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Why are members/fans? so rude to each other?

I vehemently disagree with this rule as applied. It has a great ideal, and purpose, but in actuality it is pretty woefully flawed. Especially in a very diverse crowd. There is a little known alternative called the Platinum Rule, which I firmly believe should be the way things are done. That rule is one that basically says treat others they way they want to be treated. (...) Now, sure there is really no way to know ahead of time how a person wants to be treated, which is what makes the Platinum Rule more difficult to adhere to.

This is very true. Not having much in terms of social instincts, it took me a while to figure this out when I was younger; that I was, in fact, alienating people by treating them the way I'd prefer to be treated. It seems axiomatic now, but bears repeating, that will all favour interactions of different sorts (your example about debating is a good one - I'm the type who loves a good argument, but I've seen in my classes that allowing free, unmoderated debate usually means the same handful of people participating while others sit there silently). To a degree, I'd say all social interactions are negotiations between how you want to be treated and how the other wants to be treated; too much of the former, and one comes off as selfish and off-putting; too much of the latter, and you risk being walked on all over by the more assertive.

Also, I didn't know there was a name for it. Thanks LS.

Fictitiously yours, Trent Roman
 
^ It's kind of like writing a review for a book you haven't read, isn't it?

Throw that back in my face will ya?:rolleyes:


And I apologized for that..

But how can people comment on a film that's nine months away an not one iota of footage has been shown.
Umm... EXACTLY the same way they can comment on a book where not one iota of print has been shown.

... he said in a polite, non-sarcastic and non-condescending tone.
 
When they answer with eyerolls or sarcasm ("Google is your friend"), it most certainly comes across as a condescending sense of superiority.

You know, I rarely use the eyeroll icon, but I've certainly said to people, "Google is your friend!" - but it's not been with any sarcasm at all. I love the feeling of success when a carefully-worded search gets you exactly the answer I'm seeking!

It amazes me that people don't seem to know how search engines work, or don't think to use them as their first port of call, especially when they're already online to ask questions on a bbs. As an elementary school librarian, I've been teaching people (students and their teachers) about efficient use of search engines since 1996. That some people get through school never having used one, or not knowing some standard tricks to make their online searching more successful, is... sad.

That's not to make me sound superior, but I guess it comes off that way to someone who doesn't know how to use a search engine, or who treats search engines with disdain because they can never sift through all the useless info successfully.

Why would someone ask a question if they didn't expect someone with superior knowledge to respond?

Who knows, but it happens.

However... it's not usually the original poster who does the complaining. It's often other, supposedly well-meaning (or opportunist) bystanders who decide that someone has overstepped their boundaries. (And I guess i've found myself doing that.) I maintain, I am very rarely sarcastic on this list - especially in recent years - but my enthusiastic, sometimes too-detailed responses can still be interpreted that way. Lessen the detail and someone else will leap in with more details.

I guess the other problem is when someone does get accused of rudeness and then we have the back and forth banter of two posters defending themselves. When someone unjustly accuses you of negativity or sarcasm on the board, it's very hard to just walk away from those accusations, especially if others "pile on".
 
Well, I've never been the recipient of an "X is your friend" remark where it didn't feel condescending and/or sarcastic. Without the benefit of vocal inflection or body language (or any other cues, for that matter), the words themselves carry that tone. It's like a virtual pat on the head. Just something to think about.

Useless info in the search engines is a good point. It is easier to seek the advice of someone who knows the subject matter than to search for the right combination of search terms to filter out the chaff. And I give people the benefit of that choice. If I don't want to take the time to answer, I just don't. I don't berate them for asking, as so many do.
 
Useless info in the search engines is a good point. It is easier to seek the advice of someone who knows the subject matter than to search for the right combination of search terms to filter out the chaff. And I give people the benefit of that choice. If I don't want to take the time to answer, I just don't. I don't berate them for asking, as so many do.

You know, I've often found the Trek info people needed - which I didn't know myself, or needed to Google-check a spelling or an episode title - because I realised that it should be easy to find in a savvy Google search.

Finding that answer can be exhilarating (cheap thrills?) and, unfortunately, I'd then usually add something like "Google is your friend!" because, well because it is. No condescension intended. ;)
 
... "Google is your friend!" because, well because it is. No condescension intended. ;)

I agree. I try Google (or Dogpile, my search engine of choice) before I ask somebody else. For Star Trek matters, I try Memory Alpha or Memory Beta. Usually, I half-remember my Trek facts, anyway, and the two Trek sites just confirm what I thought was right.
 
...the coloured dude...

In the U.S. that's considered an impolite term. Thought you should know.
In Britain it's kind of fallen out of use too, in the more multicultural parts of the country, and I would have said the "black guy". But there are still vast swathes of the UK, mostly the Northern parts of England, where so few black people live, that the derogatory or impolite terms are still used because no one has called the users on it.


I now return you to your regularly scheduled sarcfest.
 
... "Google is your friend!" because, well because it is. No condescension intended. ;)

I agree. I try Google (or Dogpile, my search engine of choice) before I ask somebody else. For Star Trek matters, I try Memory Alpha or Memory Beta. Usually, I half-remember my Trek facts, anyway, and the two Trek sites just confirm what I thought was right.

MMMMM, what an interesting math problem you present. Ok, assuming you half-remember a Trek fact and you check with Mem Alpha OR Mem Beta and what you thought is confirmed does that mean you're left standing there still only half right? Wouldn't you need to check both sights to confirm yourself completely right?

And, while we're on it-if a starship left spacestation K-7 headed for the Beta Quadrant at Warp Five at the same time as a Klingon cruiser left...oh, nevermind. I gotta get back on my meds...;)
 
The one thing I really despise and hate about this site is how rude and demeaning members are. People give sarcastic remarks when someone asks a question that has been asked before but instead of being kind they are rude in their responses.

Yes...perhaps the question HAS been asked before and Marco HAS answered it before but do you honestly and truly think that every member reads, remembers and has the time to search through the THOUSANDS of posts here? Get real people! I am so ashamed sometimes to even be associated with you as Star Trek fans. I really don't care if a question has been asked a hundred times a rude and sarcastic response is not needed. Simply point them to where the answer can be found or just tell them kindly if you know it!

Every single day I come here and every day I see rude and demeaning remarks made to members who are just trying to get an answer. I do not see how being rude and unmannerly can sell books. That's my take as mostly a lurker and occasional contributer and I think there are a whole lot of regulars here who should be ashamed of their behavior!

Amen, amen, and A-MEN!!!

Sheesh, don't you just love it when adults act like KIDS?

Here's my $0.02 on the matter:

I think the reason all those posters get all obnoxious is the fact that their screen name gives them a sort of shield. You never know who you're talking to, unless they actually give you their name (like the Writers do).

Sometimes, it's easy to forget that there's another person on the other line. This has the results of the Psi-2000 virus on steroids!

Steroids? That didn't come out right....

Okay, I will freely admit that I have, at times, been a bit more... assertive here than I am in "real life". Now, I sincerely doubt that I'm as evil as some here have claimed (:rolleyes:), but it always seems to me that people get pissed at what I say either because 1) it stikes a sensative nerve, or 2) they just plain misinterpereted what I wrote.

For some reason, it's painfully easy to get VERY, VERY UPSET over something that someone wrote. You just wanna crack, and respond with curses, crude humor, name calling, and so on.... (In some cases, you might even wanna make fun of their spelling...eh?)

Here's some advice: DONT. My recommendation is to type out all your anger, all your frustration, all your rage. Then, when you're through, select all the text, right-click, and then click on DELETE. Then write something civil.

Trust me, you won't be sorry.
 
^ Your mama dresses you like a Klingon.









:evil:

:lol::lol:Good one, Dayton!:techman:

By the way...those Klingon suits are AWESOME! So...it's sort of a compliment. Thanks, mate!

Oh, here's one from "House":

"Hey, man: Ya muma is so faht, that when the car's lights go on, people think she's backin' up!"

Hey--try this one:

"Ya mama wears clothing!"

(Old Ferengi crack --and it probably the one that inspired the 31st Rule....)

Anyone else got a Mama crack?
 
... "Google is your friend!" because, well because it is. No condescension intended. ;)

I agree. I try Google (or Dogpile, my search engine of choice) before I ask somebody else. For Star Trek matters, I try Memory Alpha or Memory Beta. Usually, I half-remember my Trek facts, anyway, and the two Trek sites just confirm what I thought was right.

MMMMM, what an interesting math problem you present. Ok, assuming you half-remember a Trek fact and you check with Mem Alpha OR Mem Beta and what you thought is confirmed does that mean you're left standing there still only half right? Wouldn't you need to check both sights to confirm yourself completely right?

And, while we're on it-if a starship left spacestation K-7 headed for the Beta Quadrant at Warp Five at the same time as a Klingon cruiser left...oh, nevermind. I gotta get back on my meds...;)

So if I'm only half right, does that mean I only have a quarter of a brain? Have I totally left? Has Elvis left the building?Note to self: Stop trying to be philosophical after going to the county fair and gorging on corn dogs...
 
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