What the hell do I do now?

[Kelso]

Okay, I need to vent.

My wife and I are getting divorced, and I'm no longer going to be able to afford my house... so, I met with a real estate agent today and she told me that I'm not going to be able to get what I owe from the house and I need to call BofA and get the okay to do a short-sell.

It wasn't the news I was hoping for, but it's do-able, right?

Well, after spending an hour on hold and/or being transferred from department to department at BofA, they tell me that I can't do a short-sell unless I'm 3-4 months delinquent on my payments! "Well, won't you be foreclosing on my house by then?" says I. And she mumbled something about holding off on the foreclosure until until it can be short-sold.

WTF does that mean?

When I asked if I should just stop making payments and move out, she transfered me back to the beginning of the automatic system.

So, what the hell do I do now?

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Stop paying?

 

[Mr. B]

Write a good complaint letter and launch an Executive Email Carpet Bomb

 

[trekkiedane]

Stop paying?

^Seems like the right thing to do under the circumstances.

 

[Ward Fowler]

Stop paying?

^Seems like the right thing to do under the circumstances.

I third this, unless there are complications due to your wife and the divorce agreement.

 

[Chaos Descending]

Yes, basically you can do yourself no good by continuing to pay.

Quit paying. Period. Don't send another dime.

Live there (rent free) until they start making noise about "where's the money?" and then start talking about a short sale.

Don't sweat it too hard. Also, despite what you may hear, there isn't much difference between a foreclosure and a short sale these days. They both result in you not having the house and not having the loan, and not having any extra money. The difference in credit score hit is minor these days, since EVERYONE seems to have a foreclosure on their record.

 

[Admiral Buzzkill]

My ex was telling me that she still sees divorcing couples fighting over their homes owned in common, but it used to be fighting to keep it - now there's a lot of fighting to make the spouse assume responsibility for it.

 

[Paulcpick]

If it were me I would just burn the motha fraker down

 

[Kelso]

Write a good complaint letter and launch an Executive Email Carpet Bomb

Interesting. I'll look into that.

Stop paying?

^Seems like the right thing to do under the circumstances.

Yes, basically you can do yourself no good by continuing to pay.

Quit paying. Period. Don't send another dime.

Live there (rent free) until they start making noise about "where's the money?" and then start talking about a short sale.

Don't sweat it too hard. Also, despite what you may hear, there isn't much difference between a foreclosure and a short sale these days. They both result in you not having the house and not having the loan, and not having any extra money. The difference in credit score hit is minor these days, since EVERYONE seems to have a foreclosure on their record.

Yeah, that is one of the things I've been thinking about. It really goes against the grain of my personality to just not pay the bill, but they aren't leaving me much choice. I'm going to try to talk to them a couple of more times, and look into refinancing through a different company first, but I'll keep this in mind. Though, it's hard to ignore the fact that three months of house payments would pay off my credit card.

My ex was telling me that she still sees divorcing couples fighting over their homes owned in common, but it used to be fighting to keep it - now there's a lot of fighting to make the spouse assume responsibility for it.

I don't doubt that for a second. My Dad said that when he got divorced, it was quite a coup that he was able to keep the house. But I'd love it if my old lady wanted to take it off my hands. lol

If it were me I would just burn the motha fraker down

Hmm... let's call that plan C.

Thanks for the thoughts, guys.

 

[Jan]

I deal with some aspects of this in my work and I can tell you some of the trends I've seen. First of all, the bank doesn't want your house. Believe me, they own plenty already. Plus, the courts are backed up with foreclosures in many areas so even if the bank begins proceedings immediately, it'd be a while before it goes before a judge.

One term I haven't seen mentioned is that you could offer a deed in lieu of foreclosure. I don't know how that might effect your credit.

And finally, see a lawyer. Many people think that once the property is foreclosed on or handed back, that they're free. In some cases, the bank can come back and sue for the difference in what they recoup on the property and the mortgage amount.

Jan

 

[Robert Maxwell]

That actually sounds a good idea. Pay off your credit card instead of the house, then get the bank to short-sell the house.

Keep in mind a short sale will hurt your credit, but not nearly as much as a foreclosure or bankruptcy would. Paying off the credit card should help "balance it out." This page goes into some detail about how a short sale will affect your credit.

 

[LaxScrutiny]

Your real estate laws and banking regulations may be different here, but as far as I can see, the house is worth x. You owe x+y. Any payments you make go to y.

If the house is short-sold, you will still owe y. If the house is forclosed you owe y. If you continue to make monthly payments, you still owe y-(payment).

In terms of divorce, again your jurisdiction may be different, but the debt remaining on your house should be split evenly between you and your ex. The question is your separation date or "valuation date". At what point do they calculate your financial net for equalization? If you are already past that point, then any house payments should be made equally between you. If not, it doesn't matter because the net will still be split.

If that's not clear, if you are already past v-date, then you make a house payment and you are paying her share as well as your own. Since there is no real equity in the house you won't ever see that money again.

If you haven't reached v-date yet, then making a payment will extend the time you can stay in your house, before forclosure, which might help you out.

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Kelso, I don't have a single suggestion for you, but i do want to express my "condolences" regarding your marriage and hope that you can find the best way to handle the house situation.

 

[Kelso]

Thanks for the suggestions and encouragement, guys.

I tried to call BofA again today. I was transferred four times and then sat on hold until the system hung up on me.

Awesome.

 

[Count Zero]

I'm not quite sure what BofA stands for. I assume it means Bank of America. Is it possible for you to show up personally at one of their subsidiaries? It's my experience that one usually accomplishes more that way.

 

[farmkid]

My ex was telling me that she still sees divorcing couples fighting over their homes owned in common, but it used to be fighting to keep it - now there's a lot of fighting to make the spouse assume responsibility for it.

Other couples are deciding to stay together for the same reason.

 

[Lookingglassman]

Send them the keys and say bye

 

[bigdaddy]

I love when banks get fucked over.

 

[Kelso]

I'm not quite sure what BofA stands for. I assume it means Bank of America. Is it possible for you to show up personally at one of their subsidiaries? It's my experience that one usually accomplishes more that way.

Sorry. Yeah, it's Bank of America.

The mortgage is my only account with them. Can the branch locations help with mortgage problems? I hadn't considered that.

 

[JiNX-01]

And finally, see a lawyer. Many people think that once the property is foreclosed on or handed back, that they're free. In some cases, the bank can come back and sue for the difference in what they recoup on the property and the mortgage amount.
Jan

That is exactly what happened to my goddaughter and her husband when the bank foreclosed and sold their house. I think the total they ended up having to pay was $10,000 difference -- but that was a few years ago when the sellers' market was a little better.