What is the difference between love and a crush?

[Aldo]

There's been so many times where I've thought it was love but was told it was merely a crush that I've always been curious about this. If you feel strongly about someone who is to tell you it is not love right? But then again there's always that nagging suspicion that it could merely be a strong crush.

Upon posing the question to the internet, I came up with this as an answer, that I actually really like:

A crush is when you think about how happy that person would make you.

Love is when you think about how happy you can make that person.

Without making this thread about me, I'm curious what other people think about this question.

 

[6079SmithW]

I think that's a pretty concise answer you have there in the quote. I guess I would add accepting all the negative aspects of the other person as well. Well, within reason, of course.

 

[Shazam!]

Love is when you think about how happy you can make that person.

I'd say that was the definition of arrogance.

 

[Kestra]

There's been so many times where I've thought it was love but was told it was merely a crush that I've always been curious about this. If you feel strongly about someone who is to tell you it is not love right? But then again there's always that nagging suspicion that it could merely be a strong crush.

Upon posing the question to the internet, I came up with this as an answer, that I actually really like:

A crush is when you think about how happy that person would make you.

Love is when you think about how happy you can make that person.

Without making this thread about me, I'm curious what other people think about this question.

Please put my fears to rest and tell me that you're not in love with that woman you posted about recently.

 

[Gaith]

I'd say that a crush powerfully affects you whenever you're in the subject's vicinity or have specific reason to think about him/her, whereas love dominates your thought process from rising to retiring in just about any circumstance.

 

[6079SmithW]

Love is when you think about how happy you can make that person.

I'd say that was the definition of arrogance.

I don't think so. I think what that quote means to say is "How much you are willing to sacrifice to support them." Basically, love is unconditional while a crush involves your personal conditions.

 

[Aldo]

There's been so many times where I've thought it was love but was told it was merely a crush that I've always been curious about this. If you feel strongly about someone who is to tell you it is not love right? But then again there's always that nagging suspicion that it could merely be a strong crush.

Upon posing the question to the internet, I came up with this as an answer, that I actually really like:

A crush is when you think about how happy that person would make you.

Love is when you think about how happy you can make that person.

Without making this thread about me, I'm curious what other people think about this question.

Please put my fears to rest and tell me that you're not in love with that woman you posted about recently.

I'm asking a question that has been on my mind for ages. Besides, I asked that we not make this thread about me

 

[trampledamage]

I would say there's no particular way of telling whether it's a crush or love without getting into a relationship and seeing how things go.

I guess if you have a crush for long enough without doing anything about it, you're entitled to call it unrequited love but it really doesn't make that much difference to you or the other person.

 

[Spot's Meow]

If you aren't sure if it is real love or a crush, it is a crush. Also, as others have said, real love requires a great deal of personal sacrifice (and I don't mean moping about your room suffering over how much you wish you could be with the person), such as learning to live with the faults of the other person. Usually when you have a crush, you think they are perfect and are blinded to their faults, but once you get to know them more deeply you realize who they truly are, and that nobody is perfect. If you still have deep feelings of affection for the person despite this, then you love them. I would say that only a great deal of meaningful time spent within the person's company (or chatting online, on the phone, whatever) can really reveal their true self, so that just admiring someone from afar can by definition only be a crush, not love.

 

[JiNX-01]

This essay was published in, I believe, a Dear Abby column. I don't think she wrote, I think it was submitted by one of her readers:

Infatuation is instant desire. It is one set of glands calling to another.

Love is a friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.

Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and places about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.

Love is quiet understanding and the mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by his/her presence even when he/she is away. Miles do not separate you. You want him/her nearer, but near or far, you know he/she is yours and you can wait.

Infatuation says, “We must get married right away! I can’t risk losing you!”

Love says, “Be patient. Do not panic. Plan your future with confidence.”

Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. If you are honest, you can admit it is difficult to be in one another’s company unless you are sure it will end in intimacy.

Love is the maturation of friendship. You must be friends before you can be lovers.

Infatuation lacks confidence. When he/she is away you wonder if he/she is cheating. Sometimes you check.

Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. Your beloved feels that also and makes them even more trustworthy.

Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret later, but love never will.

Love is an upper. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person.
​

 

[Small White Car]

Love is when you really like the things you know about a person.

A crush is when you really like the things you imagine about a person you don't actually know all that well.

 

[Myasishchev]

Love is a strong emotional attachment to a person regardless of one's sexual desire for that person; a crush is a desire to have sex with someone in an mutually emotionally satisfying manner.*

This is why I can say I love my dad and Christians can say they love God and a man can say he loves his girlfriend, but I would strongly hesitate ascribe the qualities of a "crush" to the former two.

Unless you're the chick in the Song of Songs, then you're a God-fucking weirdo.

The two, obviously, can coexist, but often exist separately.

*Just to clarify: In a children's context, a crush is still operating from the same impulses, although in most cases without a conscious sexual desire. It might be better called a pseudo-crush or proto-crush.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

A crush often turns to love. I don't think it's an either/or thing, at least not for me. I have known people highly prone to crushes though, who seem to really enjoy having crushes and always be in the middle of one, to phase out of it and into another. I know I tend to get intensely infatuated with certain characters, music, interests and that it will blow over quick, and my few crushes with actual people were like that as well.

Just because it's a crush doesn't mean it won't deepen into a lasting love.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

A crush is when you love someone. Love is when they return it.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

A crush is when you love someone. Love is when they return it.

No, not always. A crush is infatuation and you don't actually have to know enough about a person to love them to be infatuated with them. You can be infatuated with someone you don't know at all.

 

[Amaris]

A crush is a test drive of the car of love. /whee

 

[Kommander]

Most people think they've been in love. Some have, some haven't. When asked, very few people can explain what love is, and there's plenty of disagreement between those that claim to have known love.

Most people have had a crush, and most people can agree on exactly what it is.

 

[Myasishchev]

Alternative definition: crush is a euphemistic way of describing your creepy obsession with someone you don't know very well, and who as likely as not does not return it.

But this definition is depressing and, uh, a little too on the nose for my tastes...

 

[KJbushway]

Crush or love. If you can't tell between the two its probably lust.
When it comes the person in front of you, that your trying to see if you have certain kind of feelings for.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

You know you CAN be "in love" and have lust at the same time.