• Welcome! The TrekBBS is the number one place to chat about Star Trek with like-minded fans.
    If you are not already a member then please register an account and join in the discussion!

We are pregnant!

I am not sure if Australian men say it, they might, but it also could be a mainly American phrase. Maybe our British, Australian, Canadian etc members can tell us they have heard the phrase used.
The only time I ever heard anything similar was nearly 40 years ago, when one of my classmates ran into the music room, excitedly shouting, "Mr. Spencer had a baby!" Of course everyone knew that our science teacher's wife was the one who actually had the baby, but excitement sometimes makes people say odd things.

I have never heard a grown man claim "we're pregnant," except on some sappy American TV show.
 
No of course it is not a concern.

But if you say something a lot of people think sounds embarrassingly precious you can expect to eventually hear some negative or laughing responses. I have never said anything out loud to someone who said that (heard it a few times) because to me that's rude. But you know for every person who says something there are probably gonna be a whole lot more who think it.
 
My husband didn't carry our children for nine months, nor did he miscarry our first pregnancy. He didn't have the nausea, vomiting, exhaustion, muscle cramps, backache, piles, gestational diabetes, or the gazillion other discomforts and potentially dangerous medical conditions that can come with being pregnant and giving birth. HE was not pregnant. I was.
 
I don't think it's a problem at all unless the man actually looks pregnant which might cause some misunderstanding.
 
To me, whatever works for the couple is what matters. If a spouse's wife doesn't mind "we are pregnant," then it's really no one else's concern.
Yes, this is true.
My husband didn't carry our children for nine months, nor did he miscarry our first pregnancy. He didn't have the nausea, vomiting, exhaustion, muscle cramps, backache, piles, gestational diabetes, or the gazillion other discomforts and potentially dangerous medical conditions that can come with being pregnant and giving birth. HE was not pregnant. I was.
But, I can well understand any woman, especially one whose been through a pregnancy, feeling annoyed by the presumption inherent in 'we're having a baby'. In the Bill Cosby pilot Cliff/Bill is lecturing his son Theo on responsibility and sums it up with a funny tag about being Theo's father and he brought Theo into the world and will take him out if the kid continues to be irresponsible. It's a very funny routine but really it was the wife who did the heavy lifting.

The humor works since society gives more credit to the men than the women for the whole business. It shouldn't be surprising that such presumption is galling to some folks. So, as Macloudt says, and as another mentioned I believe about passing a watermelon or two out the male ass a few times, better men give more recognition to the women and grandstand less about their part.
 
I feel like couples that are expecting a kid can do a lot of annoying things and this is just one of them, not specifically more annoying than the rest. Doesn't bother me in particular.

Yeah, that tends to be my thought. Although I don't think I've ever heard someone say it (certainly, "we're having a baby" is more common, at least).

However, for those who are saying "if the wife's fine with it, what's the big deal," I suppose that depends on who you think Mila Kunis is speaking for. I don't think she's just saying to have sensitivity towards your wife since she's the one actually pregnant. My take is that she's saying you should have sensitivity towards pregnant women in general. But, honestly, this doesn't bother me enough to give any more thought about whether I'm right.
 
This thread has inspired me to be deeply sarcastic to the next man who says it to me :lol:

I'm thinking.. "OH that is lovely, hey did I tell you that we had a prostate exam the other day?"
 
My husband didn't carry our children for nine months, nor did he miscarry our first pregnancy. He didn't have the nausea, vomiting, exhaustion, muscle cramps, backache, piles, gestational diabetes, or the gazillion other discomforts and potentially dangerous medical conditions that can come with being pregnant and giving birth. HE was not pregnant. I was.

I think this is the reason I get a little annoyed. I had three difficult pregnancies including uncontrollable morning sickness (one pregnancy, less severe morning sickness with the other two), I had pre-eclampsia (two pregnancies), migraines, fainting, severe backache, urinary tract infections, cramps, exhaustion. I ended up spending a total of 43 days in hospital, spent over 72 hours in labour (60 hours of this was for my first birth), two c-sections because of cord prolapse and other problems, severe haemorrhaging during the third birth (I almost died) I also ended up with pneumonia as a result of having to be given an anesthesia when I had a cold.

I hated it when my then husband belittled my suffering by stating I was only pregnant. He couldn't even imagine what pregnancy was like for me.

Two of my three pregnancies were a result of failed contraception.
 
I find a lot of things said by men in monogamous heterosexual relationships to be annoying, but the "we're pregnant" thing is pretty low on the list. It's much more annoying when they say "stop fucking my wife."

On the subject of annoying pedantry: I am currently borrowing a truck from my aunt because she had an extra one and I had one less than I needed. Pretty much every time I refer to it as "my truck" someone feels the need to correct me by saying "you mean your aunt's truck." While I do not own it, it is in my possession, and therefore it is mine until I give it back. I handle this by making a mental note of who has said it and do the same thing to them when they use "my" to describe things they technically don't own. "You mean the bank's house." "You mean your landlord's apartment." "You mean your girlfriend's testicles." People should know by now that I'm much more annoying than they could ever hope to be, yet they always seem surprised.
 
I have no problem with it. If the couple in question are saying it, are happy about it, and have no issues with it then, so what. Who are we to judge?

Now, if the man starts saying things like, "Our cervix is fully effaced!" that might get a little weird.

Now that was funny.
 
I think it sounds dumb. Saying we are expecting is fine, but saying "We're pregnant"? :rolleyes:
 
Does a man use it for any other medical condition his wife might have? i.e we had a heart attack, we had a nose job, we have piles?

:) Probably not. But unfortunately I have heard spouses say things like "we're having surgery" and "our neurosurgeon".
 
I can see why it bugs people. But really i don't see it as that big of a deal. It's not exactly the most accurate but there are definitely worse things being said nowadays. If the couple is fine with it then let them say it. Better to shrug it off and be happy for them as opposed to getting all irritable at poor phrasing.
 
This thread has inspired me to be deeply sarcastic to the next man who says it to me :lol:

I'm thinking.. "OH that is lovely, hey did I tell you that we had a prostate exam the other day?"

I am so stealing this. :lol:
 
It just doesn't sound right to me.

Does a man use it for any other medical condition his wife might have? i.e we had a heart attack, we had a nose job, we have piles?

I am not sure if Australian men say it, they might, but it also could be a mainly American phrase. Maybe our British, Australian, Canadian etc members can tell us they have heard the phrase used.

Thing is you are not pregnant if you are the man. You are having a baby and if you say "we're having a baby!" it's not going to make people roll their eyes.
Now I'm starting to see the difference in how people see it. Those who oppose it think of pregnancy as a medical condition and nothing else. The statement doesn't make sense because the man isn't the one with the medical condition. Those who don't mind it or like it see the statement not as a ridiculous statement that the man is also carrying a child inside, but as a statement more akin to "We're about to add a child to our family and we're both excited about it."

I'm also getting a certain sense of man-hating or at least a belief that the sexes are in competition with one another from those who don't like it.
But, I can well understand any woman, especially one whose been through a pregnancy, feeling annoyed by the presumption inherent in 'we're having a baby'. In the Bill Cosby pilot Cliff/Bill is lecturing his son Theo on responsibility and sums it up with a funny tag about being Theo's father and he brought Theo into the world and will take him out if the kid continues to be irresponsible. It's a very funny routine but really it was the wife who did the heavy lifting.
Cliff was a obstetrician. Maybe he really did deliver Theo.
The humor works since society gives more credit to the men than the women for the whole business. It shouldn't be surprising that such presumption is galling to some folks. So, as Macloudt says, and as another mentioned I believe about passing a watermelon or two out the male ass a few times, better men give more recognition to the women and grandstand less about their part.
Oh, please.:rolleyes: I don't know a single person who gives the man anywhere near as much credit for bringing children into the world. I've lived in two countries and three states, everywhere from way out in the country miles from town to cities of several million, very religious/conservative to practically communist communities, so I've met a wide range of people. Among all of those, I can't think of a single one who gives the man more credit.
 
No need to be so serious. This is a fairly light conversation we're having. Plus, you'll have to believe me when I say that while I know Miss Chicken doesn't hate men, I can absolutely vouch for the fact that teacake does not hate men, and may in fact love them too much. :ouch:
 
My husband didn't carry our children for nine months, nor did he miscarry our first pregnancy. He didn't have the nausea, vomiting, exhaustion, muscle cramps, backache, piles, gestational diabetes, or the gazillion other discomforts and potentially dangerous medical conditions that can come with being pregnant and giving birth. HE was not pregnant. I was.
You make it sound as if bringing a child into the world is only challenging for the mother and for the father it's no more difficult than eating a chocolate chip cookie. Of course the father doesn't experience all of the physical stuff the mother does, but it's no walk in the park for him either. It's not easy for a man to watch the woman he loves go through all the things you describe and be powerless to do anything about it, and know that there's a possibility she could be gone forever because of it. It's the hardest and most emotionally draining thing I've ever done, and I've done it six times. The thing is, every time we started down that road, we were in it together. It was a partnership, with each of us giving all we could to the endeavor. We each had our roles: her role was the stuff you described; mine was holding her hand and supporting her through it all--being the strength and support she needed. I didn't just get her pregnant, tell her to let me know when the baby was ready to go to college, roll over and go back to sleep. No, I was there by her side every step of the way. I was there for the ultrasounds, all through every delivery and C-section and recovery. I was there when the AFP test came back positive and we had to wait for an agonizing week for more tests to find out whether our child was okay. I got her antacids when she needed them for heartburn. I was there holding her hand in the ER during her one miscarriage and comforted her (and I didn't get drugs to block my memory of it like she did). I took time off work to go to prenatal checkups with her or to watch the other kids so she could go. I was there and involved as any man worth his salt would be. Please don't discount the role fathers (should) play in bringing children into the world. If your husband wasn't there for you during your pregnancy, you have my sincerest sympathy.
 
If you are not already a member then please register an account and join in the discussion!

Sign up / Register


Back
Top