VFWCC #15 - There's Captions in this Nebula!

[Koinek]

Annnnndddd we're back. Welcome to another Voyager Forum Weekly *cough* *cough* Caption Competition!

Now for the winner from VFWCC #14!

The honorable mentions go to:

EMH: Yeah, that's right, you just got your ass kicked by a hologram.

Chakotay: Quiet! Someone recently passed. Two - no, three men. The leader wore a black hat and walked with a limp.
Ensign: You can tell all that from listening?
Chakotay: No, the security playback on the monitor up there.

Congratulations Nerys Myk and Triskelion!

Rat Boy scores the Photoshop special mention with this effort:

Chakotay: "Hold it! I get the feeling we're being followed.

Nicely done!

26138 gets the I'mgoingtocrybecauseyouhurtme mention:

Chakotay: What's that? A new caption contest? Where?!

Oh cruel world...



But the winner of VFWCC #14 is:

Doctor: "I'm telling you, Mr. Kim, that a personality transplant is impossible."

Chakotay: "This is where my animal guide last attacked me"

Well played scottydog! Great combined effort! You get the Sqoimy Woimy Prize for Voyager Excellence for this week:

And now on to the next image:

Captions Away:

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Janeway: "Now is the winter of our discontent..."

EMH: "If you insist on the bad Shakespeare, I will surgically create a hunchback for you, see if I don't."

 

[Shatmandu]

Janeway: "I say we come out of warp and dedicate all of ship's resources on figuring out how Tuvok's hairline is possible."

 

[26138]

Thanks for the I'mgoingtocrybecauseyouhurtme mention!

 

[Daneel]

JANEWAY: "Hey guys, look!" >Takes an imaginary puff<. "Look, I'm smoking!" >Takes another puff< "Guys, come on! Look at me!"

CHAKOTAY: "So, which of us tells her that that joke only works in cold temperatures?"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Janeway: "To be.. or not to be..."
EMH: "Aw for the love of Christ!"

 

[John Picard]

Janeway: "What part of, It's not coffee do you *not* understand?"

The Doctor: "Well, you don't have to get snippy about it."

 

[Triskelion]

Thanks for the honorable mention!

Janeway: It's a really big shoe. Really big.
EMH: If she thinks I'm playing Topo Gigio again I'd sooner decompile myself.
Tuvok: S'okay?
Chakotay: S'alright.

 

[Rat Boy]

Janeway: "I don't care if we have to shut off lift support to three decks, I want that coffee grinder working when Grignak comes back."

 

[Mistral]

Chakotay(whispering): "You didn't tell her that was Tuvok's stool sample, did you?"

EMH(murmuring): "No. I'm content to let her keep thinking I brew a lousy cup of coffee."

 

[Alrik]

Janeway: "Oops....erm....sorry."

Tuvok: "Captain. Need I remind you that Vulcans have a hyper sensitive sense of smell."

Janeway: "Again, sorry. Janeway to Nelix. Going forward, Taco Bar Tuesday is officially cancelled."

 

[Piper]

Chakotay: Doctor, what is the Captain doing?
EMH: (hesitates) She's... talking to Frank.
Chakotay: Frank?
EMH: Yes. Frank.
Chakotay: And who, may I ask, is Frank?
EMH: He's her new best friend. (meaningfully) Her new invisible best friend.
Chakotay. Oh. I see.
Tuvok: The Captain has been under a lot of stress.
EMH: It gets worse. Frank tells the Captain... things.
Chakotay:What kind of things?

The EMH looks pale. Chakotay persists.

Chakotay: Doctor? What kind of things does Frank tell her?
EMH: He tells her that the ship is going to come to an end.
Chakotay: Come to an end? How?
EMH: He doesn't know. But he's quite specific about the time. The ship will cease to exist in 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes and 12 seconds.
Chakotay: (wryly) At least that gives us time to figure out how and stop it.
EMH: Commander! This is not the time for levity. The Captain is obviously very sick.
Chakotay: Now wait a minute. We've encountered a lot of crazy things in the Delta Quadrant. The Swarm. The Caretakers. Ed Begley Jr. Who's to say that what the Captain is saying isn't true? Frank may be some kind of extra-dimensional being who's formed an attachment to her through the isolinear monmorphic bablometer field conduit (Tuvok nods) but happens to be very shy around other people. Let's just wait and see.

Janeway comes over.

Janeway: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet Frank. Don't be alarmed by the ears.
Tuvok: Ears, Captain?
Janeway: Yes, Mr Tuvok. You could hardly fail to notice the long floppy ears.

Tuvok still looks confused.

Tuvok: Captain?
Janeway: Frank is a rabbit. Well, he's humanoid, but still basically a rabbit.

The EMH looks meaningfully at Chakotay. Long pause.

Chakotay: A rabbit? A humanoid rabbit? A humanoid rabbit who tells you the ship is going to come to an end and who only you can see?
Janeway: Yes. So?
Chakotay: (grasping at straws) You didn't find him while using my - ahem - medicine bundle did you?
Janeway: No. That would just be crazy.

Longer pause. In the distance a dog barks.

Chakotay (sadly): Take her away, Doctor. Take her away.

 

[John Picard]

Janeway: "How difficult is it to measure a few tablespoonfuls of grounds, steam the milk, add sweetener, brew it, and serve? You three couldn't find your asses with both hands and a star chart."

Tuvok: "Steam the milk? How logical."

Doctor: "I have some *grounds* I'd like to measure."

Chakotay: ........

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Janeway: "Friends, Romulans, Countrymen... Can I borrow your lugholes."
Tuvok: "She's improvising now."
EMH: I'm going to improvise a sedative."

Janeway: "Cry havoc, and let slip the dogs of war!"
EMH: "Please, I'm begging you, let me deactivate myself."
Tuvok: "Payback, for the surgical arias."
Chakotay: "And the photo essays."

 

[Triskelion]

EMH: Captain, I -
Tuvok: Doctor, do not disturb the Captain while she is practicing her coffee order.

 

[Shatmandu]

Tuvok: "But if the restrooms are filthy, it is logical that the kitchen area is the same."

 

[Voyager]

Jamesway: "Come on lets go...
EMH: "Uhhh..."
Tuvok: "Capt-"
Chakotay: "I wouldn't ask her...
Janeway: I ordered coffie black...*NOT* blue...


they all walk out as Jame way storms back to the shuttle

 

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: What the f*** are you ***holes doing! Were 'f***ing lost and you yabbos are standing around yakking like f***ing schoolgirls!!!!

 

[26138]

Janeway: I traveled 70,000 LY to get home, and I find out that they fired Grignak?

 

[John Picard]

Janeway: "Seventy Light Years from earth, and I'm stuck with Larry, Curley, and Moe! Can no one brew up a freaking pot of coffee?"