Interminably long, dull and incomprehensible, “John Carter’’ evokes pretty much every sci-fi classic from the past 50 years without having any real personality of its own.
You could say much the same about the title character, as uncharismatically played by the unfortunately named Taylor Kitsch of TV’s “Friday Night Lights.’’ Even in 3-D, he’s barely one-dimensional.
Created a century ago by Edgar Rice Burroughs of “Tarzan” fame for a pulp serial, John Carter is a Civil War veteran who somehow wakes up on Mars. He’s drawn into a romance with a warrior princess and a series of battles between two groups of humanoids nearly impossible to tell apart.
Despite the reported expenditure of as much as $300 million of Disney’s money and the live-action debut of director Andrew Stanton (Pixar’s brilliant “Wall-E”), it’s hard to care about anything going on in this shapeless would-be franchise, which lurches from scene to scene without building any real excitement.