Trek XI Caption Contest #21: It's Not You, It's Me

[Rat Boy]

I know what you're thinking and you're right; it's time for another caption contest. See if you can read my mind and guess the names of...

For the perfect explanation for Kirk's bemused expression, our winner is...

Kirk: Who?!?
Spock: Finney, Ben Finney!!
Kirk: Finney?!?! What about him?
Spock: You just ejected him in the ion pod!
Kirk: I just wanted to listen to some music?
Spock: There are no mp3 players on the Enterprise. The I/pod label on that switch stands for 'Ion pod'.
Kirk: Really?!? Look at this bridge and tell me there are no ipods on board!!
McCoy (off-camera): He's dead Jim!!

For the crew of the Narada taking a blown line by Nero a bit too literally, our winner is...

Nero: "FIRE EVERYONE! Wait, no. Everything! I meant 'fire everything'! Damn it, the weapons guy's already gone! @#$%!"

Our Photoshop winner...

SPOCK: I ordered the vegetarian burger!!!!! Why cant you idiots get simple order right??? Where's the Manager??????

CHEKOV (in high squeeky voice): Is there a problem sir?

I don't usually give out awards for running gags with lines, but lucky for you guys, THAT WAS ANOTHER LIFE!

NERO: This image had a great caption... BUT THAT WAS ANOTHER LIFE!

Congratulations to the winners and here are your updated totals...

cooleddie74 - 6
Outpost4 - 5
middyseafort - 5
Nerys Myk - 5
Amasov - 3
Piper - 3
Herkimer Jitty - 3
SalvorHardin - 3
B.J. - 3
Skywalker - 3
M'Sharak - 2
seigezunt - 2
Woulfe - 2
Kirby - 2
Civil Shadow - 2
Hartzilla2007 - 2
The Squire of Gothos - 2
trampledamage - 2
Classic Fan - 2
26138 - 1
jptrekker - 1
Alpha_Geek - 1
Zachary_Smith - 1
Plum - 1
3 of 11 - 1
jongredic - 1
Super Grover - 1
Candlelight - 1
Gertch - 1
T'Aerwynd - 1
shivkala - 1
Jackson_Roykirk - 1
The Badger - 1
Captain Zog - 1
BriGuy - 1
J. Allen - 1
Alrik - 1
Lashmore - 1
Aragorn - 1
John Picard - 1
Samurai8472 - 1
Jimmy_C - 1
Cky - 1
S'kai - 1
Stag - 1
protocida - 1

Now, with a little over two weeks left until the film's release, we're in the final stretch. This week's sampler comes from still photos that were released about a week or two ago. The first is of Spock and Uhura arguing over who left the boarding passes back at their apartment. The second is of Scotty, still trying to figure out how to reassemble a beagle. Enjoy:

 

[Rat Boy]

Uhura: "Which shuttle are you going on?"

Spock: "The Braga."

Uhura: "You know, maybe you should take the transporter instead. Might be safer."

Scotty: "You're staring at the end of the scarf, aren't you, laddie?"

 

[Jackson_Roykirk]

"...and I told the admiral that all I needed was a teeny bit of fur or even a piece of poo for a DNA sample and I couldda brought that wee poochie back as good as new, but he wouldna listen to me..."

 

[Samurai8472]

Checklist Guy- Dead, Very Dead, oh your going to be hamburger meat

Spock- You might not want to wear red when you board this shuttle

Kirk- Scotty we have to get going

Scotty- I'm in the middle of downloading "All Along the Watchtower"

Kirk- Shouldn't that take seconds?

Scotty- Delta Vega's internet service providers sucks

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Spock: Did you pick up the eye shadow from the MAC store?
Uhura: Yes, de-- um sir. I also got the Vulcan contrast for you as well.

Scotty: Meh poor bairns are freezing on this rock!

 

[Stag]

YEAH!! After all these years I finally snagged a win...Thanks!

(With thanks to the screenwriters of 'Casablanca')
Spock: Last night we said a great many things. You said I was to do the thinking for both of us. Well, I've done a lot of it since then, and it all adds up to one thing: you're getting on that shuttle with Kirk where you belong.
Uhura: But, Spock, no, I... I...
Spock: Now, you've got to listen to me! You have any idea what you'd have to look forward to if you stayed here? Nine chances out of ten, we'd both wind up in a penal colony. Isn't that true, Louie?
Louie (with clipboard): I'm afraid Major Strasser would insist.
Uhura: You're saying this only to make me go.
Spock: I'm saying it because it's true. Inside of us, we both know you belong with Kirk. You're part of his work, the thing that keeps him going. If that shuttle leaves the ground and you're not with him, you'll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.
Uhura: But what about us?
Spock: We'll always have Risa. We didn't have, we, we lost it until you came to Starfleet Academy. We got it back last night.
Uhura: When I said I would never leave you.
Spock: And you never will. But I've got a job to do, too. Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. Uhura, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you'll understand that. Now, now... Here's looking at you kid!

Scotty: "Mirac ... Yer daft man!! What do you mean miracle worker?!? Do I look like a miracle worker!?!?"

 

[Aragorn]

UHURA: "Let me ask you something, Mr. Spock. Why do you wait here two hours every day when I've told you there's nothing I can do for you - that your new visa will not arrive until your planet is recognized by the Federation?"

SPOCK: "You... you have two stamp. One red, one green."

UHURA: "So?"

SPOCK: "So, I have chance go San Francisco, 50-50."

UHURA: [laughs] "Yes, that's a beautiful way to look at it. But Starfleet doesn't work that way. "

"I know I'm human. And if you were all these things, then you'd just attack me right now, so some of you are still human. This thing doesn't want to show itself, it wants to hide inside an imitation. It'll fight if it has to, but it's vulnerable out in the open. If it takes us over, then it has no more enemies, nobody left to kill it. And then it's won."

 

[Cakes488]

Uhura: Since we're fucking can I drop the Mr. Bit?
Spock: I shall consider it my little milk dud, however, it's imperative that it's included when we we role play our teacher/student fantasy.

 

[Cakes488]

Kirk: Jesus Scotty! They've kept you down in this hole so long that you're wearing shit from the 1990's -- not to mention you stink!

Monty: Well whaddya expect Cap'n, there's several years of my waste that you're stepping in right now.

 

[Rat Boy]

Scotty: "What do you mean there's a couple silver-eyed god people running around on this planet?"

 

[Mike Farley]

I dinna see any Romulans! I'm not made of eyes!

 

[John Picard]

Scotty: "You dinna know the Tom Baker Doctor Who is the style?"

 

[S'kai]

Intensive negotiations to get Ron Moore to do a cameo resulted in his only allowing the use of his name.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: And you did remember to pack the plaid skirt, mary janes and knee socks?

 

[M'Sharak]

"Well, this last time was not my fault."
"What happened?"
"Nothing... nothing, really. It was just a little classroom... it sort of burned down."
"Burned down?"
"Well... blew up, actually."
"Political activism?"
"Chemistry major."
"I see."​

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Spock: See you in seven years.

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"What does it mean...exact change?"

SCOTTY:"My bloody hero Zefram Cochrane once dressed like this...so I thought it would help me score all the wee lass tail I could get!


How was I supposed to bloody know?!"

 

[cooleddie74]

UHURA:"Okay...I'll spot you shuttle fare THIS ONCE.

But I want to be paid back by this coming weekend or I start charging 10% interest."

 

[Rat Boy]

Ron Moore (off camera): "You suck!"

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Zoe Saldana: If only I signed that deal for Astro Quest Redux.