TREK-neck.

[Rush Limborg]

Okay, so I was hangin' in da South one day --and it hit me:

In the spirit of Foxworthy himself, why not make a Trekneck routine?

I mean, we all know how ticked off we get whenever some infidel takes a cheap shot at Star Trek. And yet...many times, when this sort of thing happens to people, they often come up with jokes to lighten the mood. Jokes that take the cheap shots --and make them funny! (i.e., the "redneck jokes of the Fox)

NOW, what say you? Let's picture in our minds the most ludicrously nerdy Trekneck jokes we can think of. I'm sure it'll make y'all feel a WHOLE lot better!

What's a "Trekneck", you ask? Well...it's a purely fictional title made up by yours truly, to re-designate the Trekkie "Get a Life" stereotype. After all, the term "Trekkie" has been used so much, it now just means "a super-Trek-fan".

Now, as I'm sure many people have before me, I've put the Trek-fan titles on a sort of "scale of obsession". You know, Trekkers are more reserved than Trekkies, and all that.

Trekneck is, quite simply, the step BEYOND the rabid Trekkie. It's the term that, once you've earned it, tells you that you've FINALLY gone too far!

Now...what are the characteristics of a Treckneck? Well, LET'S FIND OUT!

I'll start off with a few I've come up with on my own:

You might be a Trekneck... if you're intended college major...is Klingon!


You might be a Trekneck... if you're dartboard has a picture of Wesley Crusher!


You might be a Trekneck... if the earrings you bought your gal... double as combages!


You might be a Trekneck... if you've got a crush on the Borg Queen!


This is just a few of my ideas. Soooo...feeling inspired? Let's Git-R-Done!

 

[M'Sharak]

Didn't Robert Scorpio do this one already?

 

[Wonderlust King]

Didn't Robert Scorpio do this one already?

you took the words right out of my mouth.

 

[AdmiralGarak]

If you expect people to keep track of all fifty thousand threads Rob Scorpio starts each day... you might be a Trekneck.

If you spend every day discussing a movie which hasn't even released a single frame of footage... you might be a Trekneck.

If you told a census taker that your religion is "Sombrerontology"... you might be a Trekneck.

 

[Rush Limborg]

Didn't Robert Scorpio do this one already?

Huh? News to me. I seem to recall a "You might be a Trekkie", on the Official Star Trek Movie Site, but this is something I kinda made up on my own. By the time I heard of that, I had already come up with a lot of Trekneck cracks.

Now... You might be a Treckneck... if you think Shatner would make it to the finals of American Idol!


You might be a Trekneck... if you spend every midnight plotting the assasination of Rick Berman!

 

[Temis the Vorta]

If you've ever heard of Rick Berman...you might be a Trekneck.

If you saw the word "Trekneck" and instantly thought "Cardassian neck trick...?"...you ARE a Trekneck (and a Niner).

 

[Rush Limborg]

If you've ever heard of Rick Berman...you might be a Trekneck

Actually, Rick's name appears a lot in the Trek Fan world. Practically every self-respecting Trekker or Trekkie has heard of him. Let's... exaggerate a bit more. Liked the "Neck Trick" crack, though!

By the way... you think maybe the "Cardie Neck Trick" is something similar to what many lizards do?


Try this for size:

If you've ever taken out a loan to buy the first ST: Remastered DVD set... you might be a Trekneck.

If every time you encounter an IRS agent, you comment on how small his lobes look... you might be a Trekneck.

 

[Jeri]

If, when you hear "I'm Late!" you think of "Shore Leave," you might be a Trekneck.