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TOS Caption Contest #93 - Up To No Good

Outpost4

Vice Admiral
Admiral
It's a beautiful Saturday morning here on the Upper Mississippi River. Time to get out the laptop and sit on the porch, listening to the birds and Bob Dylan on vinyl. My cat doesn't like his harmonica but most cats don't.

Last week's winners were Captain Kate, SciFi75 and cooleddie74. Rat Boy also scored with air guitar players everywhere through a multiple picture, photoshopped caption. Congrats to you all.

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Spock just wasn't buying Kirk's used-ship sales patter, especially the bit about 'one careful owner'.

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Pike: Let me get this straight. I give you the thermos of coffee and I get your daughter for the night?

Dr Haskins: Hey, it's been a long time since I had a cup of coffee. Toss in a donut and I'll guarantee that she'll make you scream.

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SEX TREK 69: THE SEARCH FOR SPUNK

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Kirk: "Wait for it, gentlemen..."

*guitar solo from "Bohemian Rhapsody"*

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This week we have a poignant moment between Chapel and McCoy, plus Spock up a tree.

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Have a wonderful day. I'm going to flip the record and pour myself another cup of coffee.



TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

26138
A beaker full of death (3x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
Alyssa
ancient
Bad Atom (2x)
Battrekker
cakes516
CaptainJon
Captain Kate
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Plus one this time for a total of 2!
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (13x)
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Plus one this time for a total of 14!
cultcross
DeafPoet
Defcon (2x)
Diesel Micky Dolenz (7x)
DrBob (7x)
DS9Sega (4x)
EliyahuQeoni (2x)
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gertch (17x)
goldbug
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone (2x)
Jackson_Roykirk
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
jptrekker
Kahloke
Kegek (2x)
KJM
Mallory (4x)
MGagen
Mojochi
M'Sharak (9x)
NCC-1701 (6x)
Nerys Myk (16x)
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Noname Given
Outpost4 (13x)
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (22x)
HappyBeam.gif
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Plus one this time for a total of 23!
Redfern
SciFi75 (3x)
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Plus one this time for a total of 4!
scottydog (14x)
Shatmandu (9x)
HappyBeam.gif

Sir Rhosis (2x)
T'Bonz (7x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
The Castellan
The Cutest of Borg (2x)
The Laughing Vulcan (9x)
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (9x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness (2)
Tim M (3x)
Triskelion (5x)
Tristan
Turbo
vassa
Woulfe (3x)

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Mudd Club
 
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Chapel: Talk to my lawyer.


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Kirk: When I said I wanted to roast Spock, I was thinking more Friar's Club...
 
It's raining like a bitch, here. Third round of thunderstorms in ten days.

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Chapel: "The Captain is back from shore leave. He ordered a Red Alert due to the condition of his ... area."


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Spock: "This makes all four of my balls feel great!"
 
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Sulu: "That ... is the most erotic thing I've ever seen in my life ..."


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Chapel: "This is a list of all the things they've had us all doing in these caption contests. <begins weeping, turns, runs out>"

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Miss Kolami: "First he phasered two holes through it."
 
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Majel: "I got this IMDB printout from the future. Other than this shit, you only do a movie about giant bunnies."


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Spock: "... and I nailed the blonde four times. Eight if you count both dicks."
 
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Kirk: She said she was sorry, Spock. She didn't mean to touch it.

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Doctor, kindly stow your gynecology scrapbook.
 
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Majel: "Will you sign this petition? We're telling Gene, either we get to wear trousers, or the men have to wear these skirts"
De: "I bet I know which one he'll go for"
 
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Kirk: "Come down - and enough with the cat noises Mr Spock. She's not that much of a dog."

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"I've been going through your swatches and I think you should wear red this away mission. I'll start moving my stuff into your office."

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Vulcan squirrels were becoming a nuisance.
 
Piggybacking Triskelion:

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Kirk: "Oh, come down, Spock. She's never seen a bifurcated one, is all ..."


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With the Enterprise docked at Starbase 11, Chapel commisserates as McCoy pulls Meter Maid duty.
 
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Sulu: "I've finally seen the Captain's log...."

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McCoy: "What in blazes. The Captain's log is done electronically now, nurse!"
 
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Spock: "Would you believe a race of dwarven bears carrying stone knives and spears tied me up here?"

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McCoy: "Look, you know how I hate writing checks. I'll just use the credit card."

Chapel: "But Doctor, you're maxed out again!"

McCoy: "I'm a doctor, not an accountant!"
 
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Leila: Mr. Spock, I didn't say you could look up my family tree. I said you could look up my family bush.
 
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"Spock... what th- ?"
"Y'know, Jim, he needs t' have an apple in his mouth; that'd be just perfect!
Then Daisy Mae here can crank up th' rotisserie a few R's and we can start
applyin' the sauce. A few mint juleps while we wait, and... "
"Oh... myyyy!"
 
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Chapel performed a successful walletectomy on Chief Kyle.


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SULU: And they say Vulcan's don't grow on trees...
 
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SPOCK: I have been studying the earth custom of "Foot-Ball." I am trying to determine the significance of "hanging one from the goal posts."
 
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"Here, Leonard...

You dropped your comically oversized wallet."




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SULU:"Sorry, Sir...

One minute Mister Spock was acting normally and conducting tricorder scans of this area...then he screamed something about 'a mouse' and then the next thing we knew he was hanging from the tree limb...just like that."
 
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"Here...

I wanted you to have this...in case I don't come back from the Landing Party mission. It belonged to my great-great-grandfather.

It's his old collection of unpaid 21st century parking tickets bound in leather. Take good care of it."
 
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