TOS Caption Contest #68 - Feet Don't Fail Me Now

[Outpost4]

Let's see if this computer will work well enough to post this.

Last week's winners are The Laughing Vulcan and Bad Atom.

The Giggling Elf said:

"Aye, she's a slut!"

Bad Atom said:

"Fortunately, Spock's inner nipple protected him..."

This week we'll prove it's the clothes that make the man and that feet are funny. Always are; always have been.

TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

A Beaker Full Of Death (2x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
ancient
Bad Atom

Plus one this time for a total of 2!
Battrekker
cakes516
CaptainJon
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (10x)
cultcross
DeafPoet
DrBob (5x)
DS9Sega
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gertch (9x)
goldbug
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
Kahloke
KJM
Mallory
MGagen
Mojochi
M'Sharak (4x)
NathanielM (2x)
Nerys Myk (10x)
Noname Given
Outpost4 (12x)
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (15x)
Redfern
SciFi75 (2x)
scottydog (10x)
Shatmandu (4x)
Sir Rhosis
SpiderMonkeeDolenz
T'Bonz (5x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
The Castellan
The Laughing Vulcan (6x)

Plus one this time for a total of 7!
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (4x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness
Tim M (3x)
Tristan
Turbo
vassa
Woulfe (2x)

 

[Outpost4]

When you wear pajamas to work, you dress up for fishing.

Athlete's Foot had gotten totally out of control by the 23rd century.

 

[Vassa]

"Captain, that would be a direct violation of the Prime Directive!"
"I know Spock, but I swear if I have to fill out one more form in "Triplicate and counter-signed" I think I'm gonna have to use the phaser!"

Early Transporter users' worse nightmare, Potato Toe Syndrome.

 

[scottydog]

Thanks to Gilligan, the fearless crew never got off that island.

Typical 23rd century out-of-control toenail fungus.

 

[Outpost4]

Self polishing boots!

 

[Outpost4]

Roddenberry secretly thought if he couldn't sell Gary Seven, maybe he could make a cop show.

 

[Woulfe]

Rumors of Hats being in the new Star Trek film are compounded by this behind the scenes photo from the soundstages at Paramount.

Tribbles find thier way into the new film in this one transporter scene, JJ says that fans would "get a little chuckle" from this nod.

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "What do we want? Just the facts."

Spock: "Logical ones, too."

Scotty: "Laddies, if I told ya once, I told ya a thousand times, wipe yer feet before you transport! Gah, the smell reminds me of me grandfather's pig farm."

 

[Outpost4]

Star Trek: Extreme Makeover was a flop.

 

[Outpost4]

The tribble that ran up his pant leg gave Captain Kirk warm fuzzies all day.

 

[Rat Boy]

Scotty: "Aye, the shit's hit the pattern buffer now."

 

[tharpdevenport]

Jim: "Okay Spock, we're back in time to find Sulu and keep him from mating at Chip N. Dales; just act natural."

Carl Spock: "Bitch, please."

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "You distract Jack Lord, I'll grab his hair."

 

[Rat Boy]

Lefty: "May I interest youse gentlemen in this fine piece of merchandise right here? It'll only cost a nickel."

Kirk: "Thanks, but we've got plenty."

 

[A beaker full of death]

Morning, moron.
Morning, putz.

 

[Gertch]

Static cling is worse in the cold dryness of space.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Kyle: "Will someone tell Uhura to stop shedding her merkins all over the transporter room!"

 

[Redfern]

"...Yes, our new military footwear has all the comfort of fuzzy bedroom slippers!"

...Alternatively...

"D*mnit! M'Ress is wharfing up hairballs again!"

Sincerely,

Bill

 

[Outpost4]

For every tribble squished, two more pop up.

 

[Kegek]

Kirk: Spock, that's an awful hat.
Spock: Indeed. Remember when we were wearing fedoras?

Kirk: That was pretty cool.
Spock: Slick and stylish. A fine aesthetic choice for blending into a planet inhabitated entirely by Chicagoan gangsters.
Kirk: What were the odds? - No, don't answer that.

Kirk: But the point is, that hat is the worst ever.

Spock: There have been worse, Herr Kaptain...