TOS Caption Contest #63 - Captains Courageous

[Outpost4]

It's snowing this morning in the Upper Midwest. It won't stick and this is about the right time for our first snow anyway. A hot cup of coffee, snowflakes and a laughing while judging a caption contest are a perfect way to start a Saturday.

Last week M'Sharak pulled out an old joke at just the right moment. For the other pic, my final cut was a choice between cooleddie74 caption #1 or cooleddie74 caption #2. TrekBBS' most prolific poster wins again.

cooleddie74 said:

"Quick, Spock!!! Jam your forefinger in there before it's too late!!!"

M´Sharak said:

It was at that moment that Leonard discovered what had become of his bicycle.

This week let's go back to The Cage and the Big Three. I also have a bonus caption pic that's not a screen cap but is all too real.

TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

A Beaker Full Of Death (2x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
ancient
Bad Atom
Battrekker
cakes516
CaptainJon
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (8x)

Plus one this time for a total of 9!
cultcross
DeafPoet
DrBob (5x)
DS9Sega
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gertch (8x)
goldbug
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
Kahloke
KJM
Mallory
MGagen
Mojochi
M'Sharak (3x)

Plus one this time for a total of 4!
NathanielM (2x)
Nerys Myk (9x)
Noname Given
Outpost4 (12x)
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (13x)
Redfern
scottydog (9x)
Shatmandu (4x)
Sir Rhosis
T'Bonz (5x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
The Castellan
The Laughing Vulcan (6x)
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (4x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness
Tim M (2x)
Tristan
Turbo
vassa
Woulfe (2x)

 

[Outpost4]

Pike: OK, Commissioner, I'll start Favre and Terrell Owens this week.

Spock: Sometimes he names his farts.

They're Warp Tenriffic!

 

[tharpdevenport]

Pike: "Yes, I know I 'Smell like strawberry in hte early morning Spring wind', now get away from me your creepy fuck."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Boyce: "So, what am I gonna get?"
Pike: "You can wait till Christmas morning like everyone else Doctor."

Spock: "Black."
McCoy: "Red."
Spock: "No Black."
McCoy: "Red I tell you."
Kirk: "A blowjob for whoever can guess the colour of your panties, eh Uhura?" thinking: Good think I remember last week's Caption compo.

Nimoy: "Well it was either this or lubricant, and Takei beat me to the punch on that one."

 

[scottydog]

Pike, thinking: Sweet Jesus, I need a doctor who will stand next to my chair with his hands behind his back.

Spock: Come now, Doctor, you must guess. Only the lieutenant knows how many fingers I am displaying behind my back.

McCoy: She also knows I'm giving you the finger behind my back.

Spock, the cereal killer.

 

[tharpdevenport]

After Jim let a big one rip and laughed in frientening laughter for five full minutes, the crew found this ... concerning...

 

[Rat Boy]

Pike: "Doc, for the last time, I'm not your nephew Murray. Do we need to send you to the old folks home?"

Boyce: "Eh? What's that, Murray?"

McCoy: "We should never have gotten him that poster. Now he just spends his day striking that idiotic pose and insisting he can't hear us."

Kirk: "What's that? I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am."

Spock: "Eating sugar-laced cereal until you're sick is very logical."

 

[Mallory]

Amanda always sewed Spock's name on all his uniforms before sending him to summer camp.

 

[Rat Boy]

Carl Spock: "Eat up, bitches!"

 

[Maurice]

Boyce: Nice hairpiece.
Pike: It's NOT a rug, "bartender"!

McCoy: It's a rug.
Spock: Captain Pike never wore a rug.
Kirk: (thinking) Transporter accident...next planet...

 

[Rat Boy]

Boyce: "I'm afraid Number One's condition has gotten worse. It's definitely multiple personality disorder."

Pike: "How bad is it?"

Boyce: "She came into sickbay and insisted that she was a nurse. Then she started coming on to Mr. Spock."

Pike: "That's odd."

Boyce: "And that's not the end of it. I had her strapped to a gurney, then she started yelling about how no daughter of the Fith House, holder of the Sacred Chalice of Rixx, and heir to the Holy Rings of Betazed would put up with this kind of treatment."

Pike: "So what'd you do?"

Boyce: "Shot her up full of anti-depressants. Now she thinks she's the ship's computer."

McCoy: "Well, I suppose that explains why he's been acting so loopy lately."

Spock: "Indeed, Doctor. On Vulcan, we have a saying: 'Never get high on your own supply.'"

 

[cooleddie74]

PIKE:"They got WHO to play me in the new movie?!"

BOYCE:"He does good work. If you hadn't seen it, CAPOTE is one very fine movie."

SPOCK:"Just ignore him, Doctor. He's looking forward to his quarterly prostate examination tomorrow morning."

A part of this emotionally-repressed and logically-balanced breakfast! Contains less than 30% replicated or synthesized ingredients!

 

[M'Sharak]

Spock: (thinking) Three... ?
McCoy: (thinking) Three?!
Uhura: (thinking) Threeeee...
Kirk: (thinking) Heh heh heh heh...

Outpost4 said:

Last week M'Sharak pulled out an old joke at just the right moment.

Sometimes it works. Thanks!

 

[cooleddie74]

PIKE:"No, Phil.

You can't borrow my I'M WITH STUPID t-shirt. Now bug off and get back to Sickbay."

McCOY:"You smell something?


Wait...AHHHHHHHHH...dammit, Jim, what the hell's the matter with you?!?"

Comes with a free IDIC medallion inside! Collect all four different colors!

 

[CaptainJon]

Doc: When's the last time we had some alone time?
Pike: Twenty minutes ago.
Doc: I need some more.

Spock: You see he's laughing now, but wait until he finds out about Trek XI.

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: If he tells the "Klingons around Uranus" joke one more time, the only logical action would be to smack him hard in the back of the head.

 

[SciFi75]

Pike: ::sighs:: No, Doctor, please tell me your story about the rubber gloves, the two Rigellian sex slaves, and the bottle of baby oil. I don't think I quite heard it the tenth time.

Boyce: You're an uptight little shit, aren't ya'? I hope we get a captain around here who likes good sex stories.

Pike: Don't count on it.

 

[SciFi75]

McCoy: Who the hell was Doctor Boyce?

Spock: He was a rather drunkly and crude individual. He enjoyed telling one story involving rubber gloves, two Rigellian sex slaves, and baby oil. He fell down a Jeffries tube after a one night stand with a Klingon prostitute.

Kirk: That sounds like my kind of doctor!

 

[blakbyrd]

Boyce: Here's those nude images of Yoeman Colt you requested...
Pike: Heh...I'll be in my quarters if needed,,,

 

[Outpost4]

Pike: I see Starfleet is ordering you to go to school to learn how to operate a laser cannon. Exactly when in your practice, Doctor, do you think you'll need to call on that skill?