TOS Caption Contest #284: Journey to Caption

[Noname Given]

From the Monitor screen: "...And next on 'Uhura'; everyone watching check under and around your chair/workstation and you should find a key to your new, personal Type F Shuttlecraft! Yes, today everyone watching 'Uhura' gets a new Type F shuttlecraft! Wooooo!"

Kirk: "I never thought giving her 30 minutes a day over the ship's intercom to discuss ship board issues in an open forum would devolve into this."

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: Whoa, brain freeze!

SAREK: I was unaware it had thawed.

KIRK: Huh?

SAREK: Precisely.

 

[Triskelion]

Kirk: Aah, Andorian Arctic Blast.
Sarek: A child's drink. Besides, the Vucan Science Directorate has ruled that the logically superior flavor is Vulcan Sunburst Red.

 

[Armored Saint]

KIRK: Tell me Sarek, don't you feel we already met?
SAREK: I hope I may call you friend in this reality.
KIRK: WHAT? You're the Romulan commander?
SAREK: I was in another life. We are in a David Lynch movie.
KIRK: I need more booze!

 

[Armored Saint]

KIRK: As I see, Armored Saint is still sooooooo original!

 

[Finn]

Watley: Thank you sir. I'll take this to Dr. McCoy

Spock: *smirks* I know this little cantina on Risa. We might stop by tomorrow. McCoy can wait.

 

[T'Girl]

Kirk: "The wine is quite good, are you sure you won't have some?"

Sarek: "I never drink ... wine."

 

[Finn]

Spock: (OV) We need an expendable to join myself, McCoy and the Captain for an away mission. I don't know any of your names…. whoever has green eyes join us in Transporter Room 2

 

[Armored Saint]

REDSHIRT #1: Damn, we're now on page 2!
REDSHIRT #2: Bump manoeuver guys!

 

[Triskelion]

Scotty: Well that's it, lads. The turbolift's all fixed. Who wants to be the first to try her out?
Group: ........
Scotty: .........
Group: ........
Scotty: .........
Group: ........
Scotty: What is this, some kind of a perpetual stasis feedback loop?

 

[Armored Saint]

Redshirt #1: Security team? What are you talking about, mister the Killer?
Redshirt #2: We're nurses! You can open the door now, we will hyposray you!

 

[Nerys Myk]

SECURITY CHIEF GIOTTO: (OC) The planet is secure, tell the Nerd Patrol it's safe for them to come down, pick flowers, collect rocks and play with the bunnies.

SCIENCE LT: I really hate that guy.

 

[Armored Saint]

Security chief: Affirmative Captain, we're so ready to die that we decide to wear the Robau's blue!

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Security Guy #1 (just arriving): "What's going on?"
Security Guy #2: "Somebody stuck a red light over Janice Rand's cabin door. You wanna get in on the betting? Odds are currently six to one she's not going to find this amusing."

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Live on the USS Enterprise: THE BLUE MAN GROUP!!!

 

[Armored Saint]

KIRK: I could have been talking with the Cygnet XIV delegation instead of drinking with a depressed Vulcan...

 

[LeadHead]

New Contest!