TOS Caption Contest #223: Captains, Some Courageous, Some Not

[cooleddie74]

Sadly...no one would ever know just WHO got their peanut butter into the other person's chocolate.

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Sadly...no one would ever know just WHO got their peanut butter into the other person's chocolate.

Is that a euphemism of some sort? I ask as I read it and pictured Kirk the peanut butter and Kang the chocolate

 

[CorporalCaptain]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJLDF6qZUX0

 

[TiberiusMaximus]

Kang: I admit it, you are better than I am.
Kirk: Then why are you smiling?
Kang: Because I know something you don't know.
Kirk: And what is that?
Kang: I am not left-handed.

 

[Isis]

Kirk (OS): "From your appearance and... <sniff> ...aroma, Captain Tracey, I gather you're concerned about the Prime Directive. But you can feel free to introduce the shower here--we won't tell anyone."

Kang: "Not only can I outfence you, but my pearly whites make yours look like soap chips."

 

[Maurice]

KIRK: You can't win, Kang!

If you strike me down, my toupee will become more powerful than you can POSSIBLY imagine!

KANG: You're not the only toupee-bearer, Earthling!
KIRK: Sheee-it.

 

[Rat Boy]

Schneider: "That ain't Bristol Palin's original face."

 

[M'Sharak]

The others could only watch, transfixed, as Kirk finished off
the last of the Holy of Holies and moved on, half-devouring
Cloud Festus and eying Sirah as a potential garnish.

 

[jep]

Kirk: "Eb-on-neee"

Kang: "And I-vo-ree

Duet: "Live together in perfect har-mon-ee!"



.

 

[highlander]

McCoy: "Calm down Sulu he said Yangs..not wangs."

 

[cooleddie74]

SULU:

Wow.

The Captain doesn't know WHEN to shut up and leave on a high note does he?

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK: There...can...be...only...one...

HAMLANDER!!!

 

[jep]

In retrospect, as big a player as Kirk was, it should not have been a surprise: Crossing of the swords.


.

 

[cooleddie74]

KANG: Your stretchy velour and flared trousers cannot save you NOW, Earther...

Prepare to die!!

 

[cooleddie74]

MENDEZ: It appears Fleet Captain Pike is getting tired and unfocused. Perhaps we should call a recess.

That way he can be taken to the nearest Jiffy Lube outpost to have his servos and gears lubricated.

 

[Capt_Pickirk]

MENDEZ: Delta radiation turns your hair blond??
SPOCK: Apparently so
KIRK: Similar thing happened to me when I was younger. But it was my eye colour that changed...

KIRK: Dammit! I can't use that caption!
KANG: Why? What? What are you talking about?
KIRK: I was gonna use a Star Wars joke for the TOS caption contest. But someone's already used it!
KANG: Was it the one about How I can't win or something?
KIRK: Yeah. It would've been real funny too!
KANG: Erm...why don't you use another star wars quote then?
KIRK: Oh yeah! Thanks Kang!
KANG: No Problem!

KIRK: I don't like sand!!! It's coarse and rough...
KANG: NOT THAT STAR WARS QUOTE!!!

 

[jep]

Pike: ".. -.. --- -. .----. - .- .-.. .-- .- -.-- ... -.. .-. .. -. -
.- -... . . .-. --..-- -... ..- - .-- .... . -. .. -.. --- --..-- .. .-
-. .-. . ..-. . .-. -.. --- ... . --.- ..- .. ..."

Kirk: "What's with Pike? That wasn't one for yes or two for no."

Spock: "Simple Morse Code, Captain. He said that he doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he prefers Dos Equis."



.

 

[Smellincoffee]

Kirk, OS: ..or it means NOTHING!
Captain Tracy: Did someone order...a large ham?

Kang: You know, Kirk, I think we're destined to do this forever.
Kirk, grunting: We only have..the budget for four more takes.

 

[ItsGreen]

Kirk: Ginger
Kang: Mary Ann!

 

[ItsGreen]

You like potato and I like potahto,
You like tomato and I like tomahto,
Potato, potahto, Tomato, tomahto,
Let's call the whole thing off ...