TOS Caption Contest #159: Just Another Day at the Office

[Rat Boy]

That bag of cats is getting mighty frisky, but it's time for another caption contest. First, so that they can breath lets let out...

For explaining what may have become of our intrepid caption contest runners, our winner is...

Kirk: "Ok, who tuned the viewscreen into the 24 hour Sewer Planning Committee channel?"
Pike-ov: "I thought it vas the beg of kets chennel, honest..."

For explaining Kor's grin (and maybe why K'Letus the Slack-Jawed Klingon is pointing a gun), our winner is...

Fl'unkey: Captain you do know if you shake it more than twice, you're playing with it?

Kor, grits teeth: I'm not playing with it. I'm shaking it in a manly warrior way.

Fl'unkey: Looks more like you're beating it because it owes you money.

And the Photoshop winner, who looked like he was just filling in the blanks...

Congrats, everybody. I'm sure you all did Shatmandu proud. Now, on to the next contest. First, while Chapel may be a competent nurse, her culinary skills leave a little to be desired. Second, Spock finally discovers someone on his intellectual level. Lastly, we have a special extra picture as suggested by Ziz. I have no idea where it's from, but I'm sure you guys can think about it. Fire away:

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Must be his time of the month."

Nomad: "The unit called Uhura. She had vivid memories of your dual probes."

Spock: "Impressed?"

Nomad: "Not really. I have four."

"If it's not a Shat, send it back?" That would explain what's wrong with the office toilet.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Thanks for the win!

Kirk: "...'kay, not the smartest idea showing Spock The Exorcist."
McCoy: "I didn't know Vulcan heads could do that."

Nomad: "Biddy Biddy Biddy..."
Spock: "Fascinating."

Nacelle caps are also available!

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: Yeah, she's a squirter.

SPOCK: Wha'cho talkin' about Nomad?

 

[UssGlenn]

Kirk: So it's purple in Vulcans?
McCoy: Yep, Good thing Chapel got out of the way before they went off.

Never start a staring contest with a being with no eyes.

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Spock: So, Nomad, what's a nice sentient computer like you doing in a place like this?

 

[Gertch]

NOMAD: "Lap dance is illogical."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

McCoy: "Sorry, Jim, but I'm afraid your wall sculpture, 'Yellow Melkot in Cast Iron,' just isn't very popular with the crew at all."

Nomad: "I was wondering...could you introduce me to your ship's computer? And could you say something nice about me to her, too?"

McCoy: "If they were more rigid, you could fly them like Frisbees."
Kirk: "Yes, I agree. They'd be more fun if they were more firm and stiff."
Helen Noel: "Sounds like the Science Department Christmas Party. Remember, Captain?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "THE STO SERVERS ARE BUSY AGAIN?!"

 

[Gertch]

When self-sealing stem bolts malfunction, they MALFUNCTION.

 

[scottydog]

Spock: "A strange culture it is that puts its garbage disposals up on a pedestal."

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "All right, who put the Klingon in my wall-mounted blender?"

 

[KimMH]

^ Ewww!^

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: Scotty's stuck in the plumbing again.

 

[T'Girl]

Kirk: Don't worry Bones, I know these corridors like the back of my hand."
McCoy: "Then what's that thing on the wall?"
Kirk: "Where the hell that come from."
Red Shirt: "I didn't put it there."
Chaple: "It's staring at me."
Gold Shirt #1: "It goes nowhere."
Gold Shirt #2: "It does nothing."
Chaple: "It shot that purple goo all over the wall."
Spock (os):That was me ... sorry."
Red Shirt: "Maybe we should argggg "
McCoy: "He dead Jim."
Kirk: "His father ...
Gold Shirt #1: "Helped you get ...
Gold Shirt #2: "Into to the ...
Spock (os): "Academy."
Kirk: "Kirk to Scotty."
Scotty: "ya be needin tah flame thrower again?"
Kirk: "Yes we're in
Scotty: "Corridor 34h dash 37c."
Kirk: "Try to hurry
Scotty: "Standing behind yee captain."

Strange Yellow Thing: "Could someone get me a towel please,"

Kirk: "Chaple, get a towel for the thing
McCoy: "Why is anything we don't understood alway called a "thing?"

Kor: "Yes, once I deliver the Galactica into the hands of the Cylons, I will rule the colonies."

Klingon Aid: "Who's Baltar?"

 

[John Picard]

Spock: "You can make a double decaff mocha latte?"

Nomad: "Yes."

Spock: "Impressive."

 

[Rat Boy]

Nomad: "If the food slot on deck five calls, tell her I'm out of town."

 

[Gertch]

NOMAD: "Bluetooth? How quaint."

 

[Nerys Myk]

NOMAD: "...and I got a cousin who works for Old Man Flint, what a hard ass. Then there's my sisters kid, he's a cloaking device..."

Spock regretted asking for Nomad's background.

 

[Rat Boy]

Nomad: "No, I suppose my creator wasn't perfect. He kept going on and on about this television show called Jersey Shores."