TOS Caption Contest #145: The Waiting Is The Hardest Part
- Thread starter Shatmandu
- Start date
Female voice, filtered: Will the owner of a class F shuttlecraft with the registry NCC-1701/7 please report to the hanger deck, your lights are on.
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Kirk, filtered: "Red light! Green light! Green light! RED LIGHT!"
Arms Crossed Guy: "Man, fuck this."
Kirk, filtered: "I heard that."
Spock: "... and Simon didn't say, cross your arms."
Kirk <over intercom>: Attention crew. Umm... for the next few days, in the spirit of Halloween, I'll be... dressed as a witch, on my broomstick, as I walk about the ship.
McCoy <in background>: Ooomph! Finally got it! Damn that was lodged up there deep.
Kirk: Attention crew. Belay that last announcement.
Spock: "What's this? "
Radar: "Two weekend passes for the raffle. "
Spock: "When did he sign these? "
Radar: "When he thought he was ordering a ton of ice cream. Fudge Ripple."
SPOCK:"Am I the only one who notices the zipper running up the back of the costume?
Anyone?
Fine."
CHEKOV:"Can you sign dees, sir?
Its a petition to get me a better and more natural looking vig."
The waterbug and silverfish epidemics on the ship were getting to the point where SOMETHING had to be done.
KIRK:"You'll thank me for this later, gentlemen..."
McCOY:"JIM!!
Did you SEE how far she wedged that up in there?!"
KIRK:"You'll thank me for this later, gentlemen..."
McCOY:"JIM!!
Did you SEE how far she wedged that up in there?!"
SCOTT: "Aye, make that 101 uses for a phaser. "
COMMSYSTEM:"Today's movie will be MY DARLING CLEMENTINE. Also...Dr. McCoy will he holding a raffle tomorrow at 1400 hours to support the Captain's upcoming hair transplant procedure..."
KIRK:"You'll thank me for this later, gentlemen..."
McCOY:"JIM!!
Did you SEE how far she wedged that up in there?!"
SCOTT: "Aye, make that 101 uses for a phaser. "
SPOCK:"Curious, though self-explanatory. No WONDER she walks so crookedly."
The 2267 Kinsey Intersteller Sexuallity Study:
Sulu: "I also have certain ... rare abilities. From a completely flaccid start, I can become erect and ejaculate in 10 seconds flat."
McCoy: "I'd say that's pretty much physiologically impossible. Why, the rush of blood alone would--"
Sulu whips it out and...
KIRK:"You'll thank me for this later, gentlemen..."
McCOY:"JIM!!
Did you SEE how far she wedged that up in there?!"
SCOTT: "Aye, make that 101 uses for a phaser. "
SPOCK:"Curious, though self-explanatory. No WONDER she walks so crookedly."
MCCOY: "I wasn't even aware phasers had a "vibrate" setting."
KIRK:"OR that Starfleet-issue duty skivvies could leak so profusely."
KIRK: "This reminds me, have we done a phaser inventory lately?"
SPOCK: "Mister Sulu did on last week."
KIRK: "Better have someone double check."
McCOY:"JIM...are you SEEING this?!"
KIRK: "Ouch, that wasn't the stun setting was it?"