TOS Caption Contest #121 - Hands On

[cooleddie74]

"I'll hang you up by your Vulcan balls!!!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Mirror-Kirk: "Open the door. Scotty's shits smell like Satan himself had bean chili last night."
Mirror-Scotty: "Aye, ye could light a cigarette off my arsehole, ye could."

 

[cooleddie74]

MIRROR KIRK:"What's the meaning of this uniform?

Did we accidentally beam over into the Gay Theater Group universe or something?!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "Look, asshole, you can't keep putting us in here once a week 'on suspicion of being from the Mirror-Universe' just because we make racist jokes about you."
Spock: "Which is exactly what a Mirror-Universe Kirk would say."

 

[cooleddie74]

MIRROR KIRK:"Quantum profiling!

Quantum profiling!!!"

 

[Outpost4]

"You assigned Shatmandu to a new job in this department? I demand you transfer him back! He has farting contests with Scotty, made Bones do nude jumping jacks, Uhura won't move away from the wall, and he's goosed me three times, shouting, "Jewish!"

 

[26138]

Yeah, I know this is from the props thread in STXI, but I thought the folks here would appreciate the caption more than the XI crowd...

McCoy: You know what we to to the Yeoman back there? Instead of teasing her about her cottage cheese legs, we just put some pepper on them before we start!

 

[M'Sharak]

MirrorKirk: You're not letting us out? This dude's Herbert! Right, guys?
MirrorOthers: Herbert! Herbert! Herbert! Herbert! ...

 

[Nerys Myk]

MIRROR-KIRK: Its the lights! They're shrinking the material!!!

SPOCK: Riiight.

 

[Triskelion]

Spock, you've got to help me! It's Sloppy Joe Night and I'm all out of cigarettes!

 

[Outpost4]

Mudd: Thank God he's rich.

 

[Rat Boy]

Mirror Kirk: "What kind of girdle is this? Where's my personal hair piece groomer?"

 

[Swarles Barkley]

Mirror Kirk: Come on, Spock, just let me out! Scotty just told me he's got a haggis he's gotta hide!

 

[cooleddie74]

"NEW ATTICA!!!

NEW ATTICA !!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

MUDD:"One of her ancestors was Anna Nicole Smith. Explains everything."

 

[Outpost4]

Mudd: One of her ancesters was Lorena Bobbitt. Explains everything.

 

[Rat Boy]

Mudd: "I hate the ones that are into Klingon bondage."

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "I like-a de strip clubs."

 

[Maurice]

​

THE KIRKMAN OF ALCATRAZ
​

 

[Shatmandu]

Mirror-Kirk: "My Spock never calls me a 'fat bitch.'"

Mudd, thinking: "It's great for me bank account, but the fact that he kills them after sex kinda creeps me out ..."

Miner: "This one looks like my mother."
Mudd: "As ordered."

Mudd, to himself: "As long as the tape holds until I clear out of the star system, I'm happy."