TOS Caption Contest #121 - Hands On

[cooleddie74]

MIRROR KIRK:"What kind of uniform is this? Where's your beard? What happened to my personal guard?

And where is the HELLO KITTY poster we keep in this cell?!"

MUDD:"Is your companion tested, Mr. Childress?

I just got these girls cleaned up from the last time a few miners got their grubby mitts on them."

 

[Nerys Myk]

MUDD ( under his breath): Enough with the foreplay Ruth, that Venus drug doesn't last forever.

 

[Nerys Myk]

"There's NO TOILET IN HERE!!!

Now which side is the barbaric one?"

SPOCK: " It 60s television, pal There are no toilets from here to Hooterville. "

 

[cooleddie74]

WORST High School Reunion Dance ever.

 

[cooleddie74]

MIRROR KIRK:"Dammit, man...

you can't just LEAVE me in here with my universe's Scotty! Haven't you heard ANY of the stories?!"

 

[Gertch]

"Do you know what these lights are going to do to my hair???"

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Shatner: It is NOT a hairpiece! It's not!

 

[Gertch]

"There's only one cot. Where's Uhura supposed to sleep?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: You call this a uniform? Where is the Starfleet Delta pattern?

 

[Mistral]

"I've been on the TrekBBS every day for a year! So I missed a day-you can't execute me for that!"

 

[Mistral]

"Poor Kirk. He missed a day on the BBS. For the same reasons you're about to. Ah, well, life is all about choices, now isn't it? Personally, I'd have chosen bigger tits. But that's just me. Hope you can still remember them at the execution."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Shatner: "Say, how long does it take to brush those things?"

 

[John Picard]

Nimoy: "Gawrsh, mister. You shor iz SUHMART!"

Shatner: "Enjoy your magic beans, lad."

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Mudd: "Damn it! Sloppy seconds again!"

Ruth: "Make that fourths, Harry. Mr. Spock is next!"

Shatner: "And what kind of excuse is 'you're dead,' anyway?"

Nimoy: "Really, Bill? I can ride my bike on the lot at Desilu?"

Shatner: "Of course, Leonard. I'm sure we can find someplace to put it."

Nimoy: "I'm going to love this gig!"

 

[highlander]

Miner: "No tits, Adam's apple........MUDD!!!!!!!......I'll take her."

 

[highlander]

Shat: "Leonard the Gilligan's Island convention is across the hall."

 

[highlander]

Kirk: "But I don't wanna be a pirate!!!"

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

Looking back at early concept shots, both Shatner and Nimoy were glad Rodenberry decided to make the ears bigger for Spock's character.

Kirk: Spock! You've got to let me out. It was all you can eat haggis day in the mess hall and I don't have to tell you what that means!

 

[highlander]

Kirk: "Come on Spock you gotta get us a toilet!! Uhura said if she doesn't get one soon, it's golden showers for every one!!!"

 

[highlander]

Lenny: "Bill does this shirt make me look stupid?"
Bill: "No Leonard..No....Your teeth do."