TNG's most absurd moments

[spooky spice]

Spider-Barclay! Spider-Barclay!
Does whatever a spider may!....

LOL, I remember Dwight Schultz saying [at a Con], that he couldn't understand why Reg de-evolved into an arachnid when he's a bipedal primate...

I can appreciate dermal regenerators and other devices that will heal, but I find complete DNA transformation to be utterly ridiculous.

I find the speed at which these DNA changes happen to be crazy ...

The thing that has always bugged me the most are Betazoids. I can buy telepaths, but the absurdness comes with the sheer range of their abilities. A 10-20 metre radius makes sense, but Troi can read the minds of people on ships millions of kilometers away from the Enterprise. No, just no. That's completely insane.

And the way the range changes to suit the current storyline

My favorite is when Ro, Picard and Guinan get turned into children, and their costumes shrink with them.
Apparently, their uniforms also have DNA which was damaged, consequently the uniforms never went through puberty and still fit???

(as was proven by someone else) they were wearing the adult uniforms, but I found it odd that they had kiddie sized uniforms just lying around somewhere...

P.S.- I don't see CBS airing TNG at all. I just checked both cbs.com and tvguide.com.

CBS on Sky in the UK/Ireland is showing TNG from the beginning

 

[Brikar99]

(as was proven by someone else) they were wearing the adult uniforms, but I found it odd that they had kiddie sized uniforms just lying around somewhere...

The most likely explanation is that they simply replicated properly sized clothing for themselves.

 

[Dick_Valentine]

I've been watching the first season on CBS recently so these spring immediately to mind;

The "harumphh" sound that Picard gives Beverley in The Naked Now


Worf describing the aliens in Hide & Q as "ugly animal things"

How are those absurd?

P.S.- I don't see CBS airing TNG at all. I just checked both cbs.com and tvguide.com.

I think he means CBS Action here in the UK, which has just acquired the rights to TNG...

(I'd been out of the Trek loop for so long (aside from the new movie, which I loved then came online and was surprised about all the controversy surrounding it...but that's for another topic lol) that because the only Trek shown on that channel was TOS Remastered in HD, I assumed TNG had been given the remastering treatment.
So after a year or so of watching the lovely (if slightly too retro!) TOS redone FX I was disappointed to see TNG's look more tired and dated than ever before!)

My favorite is when Ro, Picard and Guinan get turned into children

The whole episode was absurd.

My biggest problem was the fact they had Ferengi in captured Klingon Birds of Prey, for the sole reason they wanted to use the Ferengi because children outwitting Romulans or Cardassians wouldn't be too believable but they were still too cheap to film battle scenes with Ferengi ships so yet again reused battle footage from a previous episode (TNG was really bad at this....)

 

[Gary7]

"The Most Toys". Hytritium, a rare volatile element is needed to treat poisoned water? It's highly explosive? Just doesn't make much sense. Data is captured by a compulsive collector, by sending a shock through Data's hand as his fingerprint is being taken, shutting him down. Fingerprint? Voice print identification would be suitable enough. And in any case, what kind of fingerprint would Data have anyway? The shuttle is destroyed on the last shipment, blamed on the volatility of the hytritium and an "unlucky" event. It just doesn't make sense. Enterprise sensors would have detected any sufficient rise in instability to the point where they'd perform an emergency beam-out of Data. Data's positronic net has a certain signature to it. Certainly the Enterprise would scan the vicinity and detect him (there was no mention of special shielding to prevent that). And, I think we've seen before that Data can send out subspace signals. Wouldn't he have done this to alert Enterprise that he's still existing?

All of these faults make the whole episode absurd... to me, at least.

 

[brian577]

I think we've seen before that Data can send out subspace signals. Wouldn't he have done this to alert Enterprise that he's still existing?

We know he can receive subspace signals as seen in "Brothers". We've never seen him transmit signals, furthermore don't you think he would use his internal transmitter instead of a communicator if he had one?

 

[Mike Ram]

"Descent": Data and a Borg have escaped from the Enterprise in a shuttlecraft. The Enterprise gives chase and goes through a vortex that leads them to a solar system far from Federation space. They track the shuttle to a planet they can't scan, so Picard orders a search using almost the entire crew and leaves Dr. Crusher in command of the ship.

 

[Gary7]

We know he can receive subspace signals as seen in "Brothers". We've never seen him transmit signals, furthermore don't you think he would use his internal transmitter instead of a communicator if he had one?

My point was that the writer(s) had overlooked some of Data's capabilities in this episode.

"Descent": Data and a Borg have escaped from the Enterprise in a shuttlecraft. The Enterprise gives chase and goes through a vortex that leads them to a solar system far from Federation space. They track the shuttle to a planet they can't scan, so Picard orders a search using almost the entire crew and leaves Dr. Crusher in command of the ship.

Good one. You certainly figure that senior bridge staff aren't really needed in a search mission. Many capable trained people on board could do this without risking senior officers. I'll bet all cadets are trained on how to fully utilize a tricorder.

 

[brian577]

We know he can receive subspace signals as seen in "Brothers". We've never seen him transmit signals, furthermore don't you think he would use his internal transmitter instead of a communicator if he had one?

My point was that the writer(s) had overlooked some of Data's capabilities in this episode.

Capabilities that he's never been confirmed to have and more than likely doesn't have. Further more The Most Toys came before Brothers you can't fault the writers for not giving Data an ability they hadn't even made up yet.

 

[Tiberius]

"Descent": Data and a Borg have escaped from the Enterprise in a shuttlecraft. The Enterprise gives chase and goes through a vortex that leads them to a solar system far from Federation space. They track the shuttle to a planet they can't scan, so Picard orders a search using almost the entire crew and leaves Dr. Crusher in command of the ship.

Would have made far more sense to send down a few shuttles to conduct searches rather than people on foot.

 

[Cakemixo]

"The Most Toys". Hytritium, a rare volatile element is needed to treat poisoned water? It's highly explosive?

I'll buy that. I work at a water treatment plant where we use sodium chlorite to disinfect the water. It's not a rare molecule. But when it comes in contact with, say oil, it will explode.

Just doesn't make much sense. Data is captured by a compulsive collector, by sending a shock through Data's hand as his fingerprint is being taken, shutting him down. Fingerprint? Voice print identification would be suitable enough. And in any case, what kind of fingerprint would Data have anyway?.

A unique one?

Data's positronic net has a certain signature to it. Certainly the Enterprise would scan the vicinity and detect him (there was no mention of special shielding to prevent that). And, I think we've seen before that Data can send out subspace signals. Wouldn't he have done this to alert Enterprise that he's still existing?

That I totally agree. Sometimes they can detect positronic signatures ("ST nemisis") sometimes they can't (like in "brothers"). Even if he couldn't send a signal, if I remember right, he leaves signatures on the warp core so the Enterprise really dropped the ball when they didn't check that on Fajo's ship.


My most absurd moment on TNG was when Tasha was having a flashback and telling her cat to run away from the rape gangs.

 

[Tiberius]

Even if he couldn't send a signal, if I remember right, he leaves signatures on the warp core so the Enterprise really dropped the ball when they didn't check that on Fajo's ship.

Other way around, wasn't it, the warp core left a signal on him?

 

[spooky spice]

(as was proven by someone else) they were wearing the adult uniforms, but I found it odd that they had kiddie sized uniforms just lying around somewhere...

The most likely explanation is that they simply replicated properly sized clothing for themselves.

damn you and you logic! I was enjoying LOLing at the fact they'd a kiddie sized wardrobe on the ship

You ruined it for me! *sobs hysterically*

 

[Shazam!]

My favorite is when Ro, Picard and Guinan get turned into children, and their costumes shrink with them.
Apparently, their uniforms also have DNA which was damaged, consequently the uniforms never went through puberty and still fit???

And then Riker check's out Picard's cock.

 

[Cakemixo]

Even if he couldn't send a signal, if I remember right, he leaves signatures on the warp core so the Enterprise really dropped the ball when they didn't check that on Fajo's ship.

Other way around, wasn't it, the warp core left a signal on him?

Really? My bad.

 

[Brikar99]

"Descent": Data and a Borg have escaped from the Enterprise in a shuttlecraft. The Enterprise gives chase and goes through a vortex that leads them to a solar system far from Federation space. They track the shuttle to a planet they can't scan, so Picard orders a search using almost the entire crew and leaves Dr. Crusher in command of the ship.

Good one. You certainly figure that senior bridge staff aren't really needed in a search mission. Many capable trained people on board could do this without risking senior officers. I'll bet all cadets are trained on how to fully utilize a tricorder.

I could understand Riker and Worf or even Geordi being involved in surface operations, but I never really got why Picard and Troi went down themselves.

 

[MikeS]

My most absurd moment on TNG was when Tasha was having a flashback and telling her cat to run away from the rape gangs.

 

[Saxman1]

"Genesis" and "Descent." 'Nuff said.

 

[Mr Silver]

The whole joke about Picard being really into horse riding and how any experienced horse rider should own their own saddle. Absurd but still pretty funny.

 

[Brikar99]

The whole joke about Picard being really into horse riding and how any experienced horse rider should own their own saddle. Absurd but still pretty funny.

I'm not sure what's absurd about it. I know several people who own their own saddles... and their own horses.

 

[MasuPu'a]

Genesis. A mutated virus messing around with DNA, zany evolution shenanigans ensue with the crew devolving into various monsters. And Spot turns into a lizard, because 'mutated genetics' are a magical, mystical force that can turn people into cavemen or X-men. Classic Braga.