
Yeah, yeah, another long break. I’ve got things going on, okay!
We cold-open in sickbay where Nurse Ogawa is treating Riker for injuries he received while making out with a subordinate in arboretum and he rolled over onto an alien cactus that skewered his back. Ouch! And, jeeze, Riker! Take that stuff to the holodeck!
We slip past that and watch as Barclay neuroses his way with Crusher complete with his own diagnosis he got from WebMD:24c Edition, I ask again why this guy isn’t medicated or something. People with various personality and nervous/social orders today can get help and be put on medication that allows them to lead a regular life. Now, sure, depending on the healthcare status of the area you live in it may be hard to get that treatment, or psychological disorders may not be treated as seriously; but here we’re in the 24th century. Put the guy on some Valium or something.
It appears to be a busy day in the sickbay as Ogawa switches between dealing with Riker and another patient, a background staff person deals with yet another patient and while Crusher deals with Barclay Data comes in carrying his cat, Spot.
It seems at some point in the last few episodes/seasons/whatever Spot had a gender-identity crisis that was identified and treated including giving spot a uterus implant to allow him to be completely female. Because, you see, Data’s cat previously referred to with male pronouns is pregnant. Data has come in to have Spot given a check-up because he, ahem, SHE seems to be showing early signs of getting ready to give birth. Crusher, whose job duties extend into the veterinary field, confirms that Spot will be giving birth soon, Nurse Ogawa also chooses this moment to reveal she is also pregnant and Data offers to give advice to Ogawa because watching over a pregnant transgendered cat Is the same thing as offering help to a pregnant female human or offering insights to her human(oid) husband.
A diagnostic test Crusher set-up for Barclay completes and she looks over the results still WebMDing his concerns (Valium, seriously. And maybe block some websites on the guy’s log-in) and she diagnoses him with having some alien form of the flu. This form most humans are immune to but that gene in Barclay is dormant so she gives him a hypospray shot that should activate that dormant gene and allow his own immune system to fight off the virus naturally. Which…. Isn’t how viruses work, exactly, people can and DO die from the flu without some form of treatment and is generally why vaccinations are suggested and seeing a doctor early when you have symptoms. But, whatever, futuristic T-Cells.
Sometime later the Enterprise is conducting tests on some upgraded weapons systems in an asteroid field, they launch a volley of torpedoes and while two of them strike their targets one of them veers off course. They attempt to remotely detonate the torpedo but cannot make contact with it, it goes out of range precluding them from tracking it or hitting it with phasers so it’s decided to chase after it.
Data warns that the asteroid field is unusually dense (well, unusually dense for an asteroid field in a sci-fi setting) so the Enterprise cannot go after it herself. Picard decides he and Data will take a shuttle to chase down the torpedo; before leaving he admonishes Worf for the torpedo’s failure.
Before leaving, Data checks in with Spot leaving her in the trust of Barclay as other crew members have had poor encounters with Spot, Barclay is surprised and honored by Data’s request and seems to be one of the few Spot takes kindly too, and Barclay reciprocates showing himself to be a true cat lover, even being able to deduce where Spot has picked to give birth. (The Spot Spot, if you will.) It’s actually a nice little scene with Barclay. I give the character a hard time but Dwight Shultz does do a good job with him and the character is enjoyable.
Data and Picard depart the ship via shuttle.
As soon as they are away things appear to already go wrong on the ship, Worf is going over the torpedo system and having bursts of frustration and anger causing him to be relieved by Riker. We next see Worf in Ten-Forward tearing into a plate of food filled with various greenery, turkey legs and octopus tentacles. He’s eating into the dish savagely like, well, a Klingon but usually Worf tends to have table manners more on par with humans. Troi wanders up to him upset that they’d agreed to have lunch together, Worf yells that he is hungry. Troi carries with her a glass of water which she soon empties, and for lunch she orders a double-order of caviar. Worf questions this, and Troi says she’s in the mood for something salty and then questions if the environmental system is faulty because the air in the ship feels dry. As the caviar arrives Worf, in an almost animalistic way, leers at the chest of the server and then leers at Troi as she eats her caviar with a spoon like it’s ice cream.
She thinks Worf is under stress and recommends he takes it easy, he agrees and storms off. “Not now,” Troi muses to herself as she continues into the caviar and a server brings her a fresh glass of water, which Troi eagerly drinks from.
That night Worf rouses from a slumber with a roar, the soundtrack takes on a great eerie tone with drum beats in it to represent the pounding of Worf’s heart. He climbs out of bed and darts around his quarters seemingly exploring it like an animal in a cage, he collects a few items and spills them on the floor; he then goes to his mattress, rips it open and pulls out some of the padding inside of it dumps it on the floor in a pile; he curls up almost like a fetus in his improvised “nest.”
The next day in Engineering Geordi, Riker and Barclay are going over the weapon system problems, or something or another, and Barclay is rambling on about his diagnosis of the problem like Neil deGrasse Tyson on crack; he speaks so fast Geordi has trouble keeping up with him but Riker shows much more of a struggle as he shakes his head in confusion looking over the problem on PADD and tells them to just get to work. An alert comes up which Barclay quick identifies and runs off with equipment to work on it, Geordi follows.
On the Bridge, the helmsman seems to struggle at his console as Troi rocks and, twitches, and stirs in the captain’s chair, rubbing her arms as if she’s cold. She gives the computer an order to raise the temperature on the bridge, as well as the humidity. Worf circumvents the order and tells the computer to return everything to normal. You’d think the computer would know who is in charge and who to listen to. Deanna orders the computer to reinstate her orders, she sits there for another moment before disgustedly saying she feels she needs a bath; she leaves the bridge to Worf and walks off.
In a Jefferies Tube Barclay and Geordi come up on the problem, which Barclay quickly gets to work on, Geordi acts tired and exhausted but notes the problem was caused by an corrosive organic material of unknown origin. Barclay says he’ll look into it and tears off as Geordi slumps to rest in the tube.
On the bridge the helmsman reports that Starfleet wants a report on the new weapon systems, Riker doesn’t seem to understand the question. The drum beats of heart palpitations start up again as Riker thinks up an answer.
Troi is in the tub in her steamy quarters, bathing in her uniform no less, as Worf enters and orders her out of the tub. She refuses to get out and attempts to drink a glass of water when Worf attacks her, biting her on the cheek.
We cut to sickbay where Troi is being treated on a bio bed, shivering under her futuristic shimmery sheet. Ogawa notes other crewmembers have complained about temperature (in both directions), Crusher orders for Ogawa to contact the other doctors on the ship as it seems a viral infection if on the ship. Oddly, of note, she’s not healed the bite wound on Troi’s cheek. |
She goes over to deal with Worf who is being watched over by a security officer, he walks off as Crusher begins asking Worf about any symptoms he doesn’t respond to her questions, nor does he seem to even understand her. She attempts to begin the test when she notices two sacs on either side of his jaw, as she begins to inspect them closer and (quite stupidly) stands right in front of Worf and asks him to open his mouth. As he does, a spray violently erupts from his mouth and hits crusher in the face.
In a chilling performance from either McFadden or a stunt double she lets out a terrifying scream, covers her face and begins writhing violently on the floor in pain. Worf runs off as Ogawa and others rush over to treat Crusher.
A tense music sting takes us to the next scene where Ogawa briefs Riker on Crusher’s status, she was put in stasis before the paralytic effects of the venom could take effect. She needs reconstructive surgery but otherwise should be fine. Ogawa uses her fists a lot for indication and takes on a more ape-like posture.
Barclay, still speaking quickly in a higher pitched voice, reports that the venom from Worf was similar to acidic compound found in the Jefferies Tube.
Riker continues to struggle with the big words and focus his concentration as Barclay hovers over him menacingly, Ogawa thinks a serious infection is on the ship. Geordi arrives, strangely symptom free, and says the sensors struggle to track Worf and recommends a higher security alert. Riker, really struggling, goes along with it mostly by prodding Geordi into making the call.
As everyone is dismissed, Geordi walks off…. Normally. Barclay rushes out the door quickly and Ogawa pushes herself up from a seated position using her fists, pushing herself along the table a bit before walking towards the door with a slightly mannish stance.
Riker begins to ask the computer to send out the security/emergency call for Starfleet but cannot think of the security codes when the computer asks for them.
On the shuttlecraft three days have passed between now and the shuttle’s departure. Data and Picard have recovered the torpedo and headed home but the Enterprise is not at the pre-arranged coordinates. Scanning the area, they find the ship two light-years away. Which, good, given the shuttle is limited to full impulse, which means the shuttle will get there, going full impulse, in about 8 years.
Luckily they slip through a wormhole between locations because they come upon the ship shortly and find it adrift in a lateral spin. They cannot identify any specific lifeforms on the ship, though there are life signs. They match the ship’s spin and manually dock the shuttle.
(In one of those “geek moments” that bothers me we see the warp engines of the ship a glow which you’d think they’d be off if the ship’s gone several days without the warp engines being maintained; an automatic shutdown you’d think would have occurred.)
Inside the darkened, messy, shuttlebay Picard and Data try and to get information on the ship but find main power offline and need to get to the bridge to get the info they need. On their way in a corridor they hear various animal noises around them and come across a sheet of shed skin. Data notes no species on the ship sheds skin in such a manner. Later, they pass by Counselor Troi’s quarters which has condensation on the exterior of the door jamb. They go inside to find more condensation on the walls and a foggy/steamy atmosphere to the room. Picard notes the environmental changes.
They enter Troi’s bathroom and find her lying motionless in her filled tub; when Picard lifts her out she reacts strangely, not speaking or seeming to notice what’s going on around her. Data scans her and Picard notes the changes in her appearance, which is more amphibian including the ability to metabolize water and air for oxygen. Fundamentally, Data notes, she’s no longer human. Well, Data, actually…
They also note she’s been bitten and the bite wound contains Klingon DNA. They continue to the bridge to get the ship under control and to investigate.
On the bridge the helmsman is dead in his chair behind the exploded console, Data notes the helmsman also shows signs of the DNA change but appears to have been killed by an animal before any change could take hold. At his console Data finds there’s 1,011 life forms throughout the ship, that of the Enterprise population and it’s all transformed into more animalistic signs. The signs are scattered around the ship, though there’s concentrations in the arboretum and aquatics bay.
Picard regains attitude control of the ship but they still cannot regain main power, they interrupted by a series of noises coming from the Ready Room.
Inside they find Riker, looking like an early ancestor to humans, pacing around the room trying to get inside the Picard’s aquarium, now housing a jellyfish, they attempt to communicate with him on some level but the smaller brain of the proto-human cannot understand them and he begins to attack. Data knocks him out with a phaser and continues his scans.
Later, in sickbay has gone over Riker, Troi and other crewmembers and his reached a conclusion on what is happening and this is where we have to pick our boots up.
Somehow a virus on the ship is spreading which is activating dormant T-Cells in the DNA of the crew, these reactivated T-Cells are causing dormant genes in the crew to “de-evolve” into earlier forms of life related to their home worlds.
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