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Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #481: Hello Geordi

LeadHead

Director of Comedy
Premium Member
Good evening everyone! Sorry to be so late starting this one!

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First up to the plate, we have the "One of the reasons why I prefer chocolate" Award, going to shivkala for:

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Computer: Riker, William T. do you concur?

Riker: Ah..Agwee

Computer: Response unclear. Riker, William T. do you concur?

Riker: Ah..Agwee

Computer: Response unclear. Riker, William T. do you concur?

Picard: Merde, I'm going to die because Riker had to eat those peanut butter crackers...


Next, we have the "Musical Accuracy" Award, going to Laura Cynthia Chambers for:

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RIKER: *sings* "Standing on the corner, watching all the girls go byyyy..."
WORF: "You fail on all counts. I am not a girl, and I am not going anywhere. Nor is that a corner."
RIKER: *sings* "Leaning on the doorpost, getting glared at by Mister Worf...nah, not feeling it."


Next, we have the "Time to turn the comm badge off" Award, going to The Laughing Vulcan for:

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Data on comm: "Inquiry, Commander. Snu-snu?"
Riker: "In your own time, Mr Data, in your own time. Don't contact me unless there's a red alert. Riker out."


Next, we have the "Bearded Vengeance" Award, going to inflatabledalek for:

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Riker: Geordi just showed me a picture of the time you copied my beard. NOW YOU MUST DIE.


Next, we have the "No loss really" Award, going to huskers57 for:

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Riker thinking..."Man, my life sucks... glad I forgot it!"


Lost of great Photoshops this week! We have two winners!

First, from Nerys Myk:

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PICARD: I want that boy off my ship! No beats my high score on my ship! No one!

Second, from tharpdevenport:

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Riker: "I want to un-see this."

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Our winner is Triskelion for:

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First Officer's log: I can't wait to discuss this traumatic experience in counseling.

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Our KBL goes to Finn for:

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Riker: One does not simply become a Captain


Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

And now, keeping with giving our main characters each a contest, here comes the next in the Main Title order: Geordi La Forge!

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Enjoy!
 
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Riker: One does not simply become a Captain


Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

And now, keeping with giving our main characters each a contest, here comes the next in the Main Title order: Geordi La Forge!

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Picard: Dang, I was hoping you'd come to the bridge via another malfunctioning turbolift.


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Data: Geordi, what is your fascination with that panel?

La Forge: My VISOR is picking up something strange, there's an entire corridor behind this.

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La Forge: I've got the router back online!

Picard: Good, all hands resume playing freemium games.

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La Forge: It's just a plastic sphere with a lightbulb, Commander.

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Picard: Well, our work is done here. Helm, set a course out of the system. Warp 8.

La Forge: Captain, wait!

Picard: Engage.
 
T4TW Leadhead!
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Troi: - and Brahms said it lit up when he rubbed it - oh.
Picard: What a los - oh. I mean, um, let's see if we can't get it to 40 percent, Counselor.
LaForge: Get what to 40 percent?
Picard: ...Counseling...readings.
LaForge: I KNOW YOU TALK ABOUT ME.

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LaForge: There it is again - a two percent drop in engine output. What's causing that?
Data: The only way to be certain is to dismantle the entire plasma injector assembly.
LaForge: Or we could call Wesley down here.
Data: To fix it?
LaForge: To pin it on.

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Geordi: It says here that when two redshirts both have speaking lines, the one who is closest to retirement goes with the landing party.
MacDuff: Crap.

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Riker: Only one color?
LaForge: Pakled Simon.
Riker: Even Troi could beat that.
Troi: Plex me? Plex you!
Worf: Red! Try red! Do the red one!

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Geordi: Hey from the viewscreen it looks like Max Headroom on the bridge of the Enterprise!
Rasmussen: I get that all the time.
Riker: Well now that he mentions it, you do bear a rather striking resem -
Rasmussen: THAT WAS A DYSTOPIA. THIS IS A UTOPIA.
Wesley: So?
Rasmussen: THOSE ARE TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT TOPIAS!
 
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Starfleet's new policy that the Captain had to personally perform yearly prostate exams in front of witnesses was less than popular.
 
Thanks for the win!

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Picard: Everybody, I'm Geordi, I can't get a date, I...he's right behind me, isn't he. Yup, yup he is.

Geordi: It's okay, last time I caught you mocking me, you made me Chief Engineer just to placate me. So...make me a full commander and we'll call it even?


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Geordi: Damn it! I just Windexed the control panel. There's a smudge! Ensign Gomez! Have you been eating chocolate and using the panel again?

Gomez: No sir! That's Barclay!

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LaForge: I told you! Here it is, Worf's Starfleet application. Worf Son of Mogh Sue Ellen Rozhenko.

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Riker: For the last time, Mr. LaForge, leave your sex toys in your quarters!

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Geordi: Rasmussen? Why he's just a knock-off version of The Doctor!

Picard: Geordi? Suddenly we're experiencing static!

Geordi: He's...sonic...screwdriver...jam...

Rasmussen: Sonic screwdriver? Who'd use that? These are sonic pliers!
 
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Geordi: "See Dta, when I move my fingerr up and down it makes this sound (woo-wee woo-wee), but when I move it side to side it does this (wah-coo wah-coo)."

Data: "And you called me from the bridge for this?"

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Geordi: "Properly calibrated Commander, it should be able to tell us why Doctor Crusher is on the bridge."
 
Thanks for the KBL Win :)

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Riker: There's nobody there, Geordi

Deanna: Geordi's aroused, I can feel it strongly. He seems to believe there's...a brunette sitting on his lap

Geordi: Let's blow this joint and head down to the holodeck, Leah!
 
IS IT SEASON ONE and/or TWO? IDENTIFICATION CHECK LIST:

☑ Lousy cinematography.
☑ Poor lighting.
☑ Overall 1970's cheapness feel with some good ideas.
☑ Doctor on the Bridge for no apparent reason.
☑ Counselor on the Bridge for no apparent reason.
☑ Senior officer striking awkward pose.
☑ Senior officer letting an ensign fiddle away with something instead of doing his or her duty.
☑ Some piece of filming equipment partially visible in the upper frame.

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Yup, it's probably season two.
 
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Geordi: I was told this was Spock's Brain
Riker: Where did you get it?
Geordi: Ebay
Riker: You've been had.
 
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Picard: You're just in time Mr. Laforge. We're about to check if Worf has a shadow this season to see if we'll have 6 more weeks of sweeps.
 
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LAFORGE: Don't mind them. They just wanted proof you were a real woman and not just another program I whipped up on the computer.
***TRANSMISSION TERMINATED***
LAFORGE: Uh....hello??
 
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Geordi: This is the special edition Pogo Ball.

Riker: Get the retro one from the 20th century. It's far superior before we cheapened our materials.
 
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Riker: This should help us forget all the Clues. Third time's a charm, eh Geordi?
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Geordi: Whut...?

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Geordi: Well there's your problem. This intermix ratio is outputting a phase variance of point zero zero three into the delta band causing a slight warp imbalance and putting differential torsion stress along the port nacelle strut that's overtaxing the structural integrity field. Yup.
Ro: Well one thing's for sure.
Geordi: That I'm an engineer?
Ro: No, that you and I have never hooked up.
 
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