Discussion in 'Star Trek: The Next Generation' started by LeadHead, Oct 27, 2012.
Deanna was, technically, correct when she said she'd never kissed Riker with a beard before...
PICARD: I am Locutus of Borg. Resistance is futile. Your life as it has been… ah, wait a moment Number One, I'm getting a call on my bluetooth...
PICARD (distractedly): Hi... Yes, I'm telling him right now... OK, talk later... No, I can't say that here... he'll hear me, that's why!... Fine, fine... Locutie loves his Queenie-Weenie...
PICARD (back to Riker): Uh, right, where was I, again?
Troi and O'Brien discover what happens when the Calamarain Ambassador drinks too much wine...
RIKER: Geordi, it was your turn to pay the electricity bill this month.
GEORDI: Yeah, but with a VISOR, I can see in the dark, so screw you.
Military budget cuts meant that Starfleet interrogation techniques were a mere fraction of their Cardassian equivalents.
PICARD: OK, the lights are off and the Counsellor has assumed the position. Gentlemen, it's party time.
Counselor Troi, when you are free, perhaps you can help me locate the clown Commander Riker said he punched up here.
O'Brien: When I was down.
Troi: I was your clown.
Data's new blinding light alert wasn't as effective as he had hoped.
Riker: Mmmmmmmm. Oh yeah, Deanna, that feels real good! ::Opens Eyes:: WORF!!!!!!!!!!!
Riker: "Black turtleneck... tech fetish... my god. It's Steve Jobs, back from the dead."
Locutus: "Yeah, I think we're gonna pass on assimilating Acting Captain Genius over there."
O'Brien: "Poo gas! My one weakness!"
Riker: "-and furthermore, the Jilraxiun Ambassad- you're watching porno on that thing, aren't you?"
Data: "Are you aware you were doing Warp 6 in a 25 mile an hour zone? License and registration."
Picard: "Will, I know you're thinking of beaming Deanna's pants into space."
Riker: "What gave me away?"
Worf: "Your hand is hovering dramatically above the transporter controls."
Narrator: "Was Commander Riker truly abducted by aliens? Or was it just a figment, conjured by a stressed and fractured mind? Find out after the break, on Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction."
Worf: Captain. I have returned from the Qo'noS annual "Big Battlin' Batleth Blowout" only to find the entire crew thinks they are - kittens!
Locutus: And as part of my assimilation of Picard's skills and knowledge I have taken the Borg Drone most prone to just standing and drooling with a vacant expression on his face, stood him on my right and called him Number One.
Troi (OS): "I'm not trying to nitpick, but think you might be a bit more comfortable if you changed into pajamas?"
Thanks for the win! - Mistral
Picard: "Check the sensors, Mr. Worf. I want to know who farted!"
Riker(thinking): "The next time I flop back onto my bed, I have got to remember to take the phaser off of my belt..."
Riker: Locutus of Borg, you say the Borg represent perfection but they still couldn't cure your baldness!
Troi's karaoke attempt at Child in Time did not go well, the crew always called her the screaming banshee afterwards...
LaForge: They call it the stairway to heaven.
Data: Behold! My stroboscopic orgasm inducer!
Picard: What is that brown thing down there to my left numba one?
Riker: Just Troi's ass sir.
Riker: (screaming) No! You are not putting my manhood under the cold examination of a laboratory!
Did I leave the polarity reverser on?
O'Brien:"Ohh Bloody Hell...." (Braaaappppppp)
Troi: "Oh dear god that has some hang time"
O'Brien: "Klingon Tacos., Sorry about that Counselor"
PICARD: To hell with their harmony being off. I'm not even sure they're singing the same song!
Pavel Chekov impression night was always a hit.
Thanks for the 'shop win
Riker: I don't remember leaving Miles O'Brien's bachelor's party last night
Geordi: Why is Data's head bolted to the ceiling?
Worf: Transporter room, one to beam to Borg vessel.
Locutus: Where is Worf going Number One?
Wesley <snickering to Ro>: "Going Number One."
Riker: He's gone to transmit a weaponized code into your Collective.
Locutus: What is it, an algorithm?
Riker: Let's just say we're never gonna give you up.
Borg: NEVER GONNA GIVE NEVER GONNA GIVE NEVER GONNA GIVE....
Riker: Mrs Troi? Are you still here? I'm not changing out of my uniform, you know!
Voice in Riker's head: <tee hee>
Beam up youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuooo....
Riker: Ready to try your Bigfoot call again, LaForge?
Data: I do not believe the Bigfeet are convinced.
Worf: Sh! I hear them! Cunning coyote mimicry.
Riker: We're...working on a rescue plan, sir. We'll be in touch.
DATA: Data to Worf. We have got a 10-82 in Riker's quarters.
WORF (over comm): Unauthorized personnel?
DATA: No, that is a 10-07.
WORF: Then what's a 10-82?
DATA: Disappearing a dead hooker from the Commander's quarters.
Winston Worf: That's thirty minutes away. I'll be there in ten.
Data: "Captain, are you sure it's a good idea to 'hot wire' the ship?"
Picard: "I tried calling Triple-A, but apparently I forgot to renew our membership."
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