TNG Caption This #163 - 'Not of the canon'

[cultcross]

That's it for contest #162, and creating a paradox with predictions from time travellers that [highlight]THE WINNERS![/highlight] would never surface, here they are:

For the first image,

LaForge: "Oh, great, thanks, Commander! Where did you find it?"

Riker: "In a Jeffries tube, right next to the ventilation grill to Counselor Troi's quarters."

LaForge: *embarrassed silence*

Riker: "Do I need to say anything more, or do we understand each other?"

For the second,

DATA: We don't take canon violations lightly around here.

And the photoshop winner this week goes to more of a continuing story: Quantum Trek: The Next Leap as a combined effort

The Scott Bakula inter-TREK crossover nobody expected.

"Oh boy!"

For this contest, we have a guest entry from our very own Shatmandu, who was just tuning in to a Night With Worf on pay-per-view, when he happened to capture this. Picard and Troi knew how he felt.

 

[Triskelion]

So son, have they made you a meme yet? That Grignak is a meme, Convay Tvitty is a meme, and, who is that -
Uncontrollable Diarrhea McCoy, Lastochka.
Even that unpleasant little orphan boy Vomit.
Ve don't know he's an orphan Lastochka -
Go on, tell me he has a mother. And you, Worf? You can't have some quirk or sexy habit like the assless chaps?
I AM NOT WEARING ASSLESS CHAPS.
Come on, Worf, let Mama embroider you a nice pair of assless chaps.
I have all the specs and diagrams at home!

Youtube, Counselor?
Mm hm.
Fearless warrior my assless chaps.

 

[scottydog]

Worf: "I do NOT understand. I should NOT be able to see your reflections in the mirror."

Picard: "So Commander Riker did use Geordi's visor to scratch his taint."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Worf: "I do NOT understand. I was raised by Russian jews, but I do not have the accent, nor do I exhibit the same cultural idiosyncracies."

Troi: "That's you checking out my ass, that's you slapping it on the way out of the briefing room. That's where you said, in front of the Admiralty no less, 'Nice caboose, toots', that's where..."
Picard: "Your point being..."
Troi: "It's a clear case of sexual harrassment!"
Picard: "In the future, we've evolved beyond the need for sexual harrassment lawsuits."
Troi: "Don't make me slap you upside the head."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Picard: I'm curious to see this video you say you made with Dr. Crusher--"Two Girls, One Cup."

 

[scottydog]

Worf: "I do NOT need you to cut my meat ANY LONGER."

Helena Rozhenko: "Oh Worf. You are breaking your mother's heart!"

Worf: "In that case... you may continue to change my diaper."

Troi: "So you'll do something about this?"

Picard: "Indeed I will. Picard to Wesley Crusher. Please find a better place to hide the video camera in Counselor Troi's quarters."

 

[Nerys Myk]

HELENA: All I'm saying is that you should wear bangs*

PICARD: How did they put our faces on those bodies?

* My mother said something similar the first time she saw Worf

 

[Rat Boy]

Worf: "Do you two mind?"

Sergei: "It's okay, son. We know you like singing Michael Jackson's 'Man in the Mirror' when you think no one's looking."

Picard: "Is that Worf singing...?"

Troi: "'Man in the Mirror,' I know. Why do you think I dumped his loony ass?"

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Worf: Get out! I wasn't doing anything!
Helena: It's okay, Worf. It's natural for a young warrior to polish his bat'leth every once in a while.
Sergi: In fact, I did it this morning in the sonic shower.

Troi: You see, those bastards at TrekBBS keep making caption contest jokes about my driving.
Picard: Well, counselor, you have to admit that your track record isn't exactly superb.

 

[Rat Boy]

Worf: Get out! I wasn't doing anything!
Helena: It's okay, Worf. It's natural for a young warrior to polish his bat'leth every once in a while.
Sergi: In fact, I did it this morning in the sonic shower.

Worf: "My sonic shower?!"

 

[Finn]

A cut scene from Parallels where Tasha wasn't killed off...

Helena: Tasha seems like a nice girl.
Sergei: She reminds me of your mother at that age.
Worf: I know. But Data is my superior officer.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Helena: Ve have bad news for you, Vorf. You aren't Russian.
Sergi: It's true ve found you in a rocketship that crashed landed just outside the farm.
Worf: So my head isn't a birth defect?!

 

[scottydog]

Worf: "YOU are an EMBARRASSMENT to me."

Sergey: "Vie? Becuss I haff a Bride off Frankenstein beard?"

Worf: "No. Because you arranged my hair like scottydog's avatar!"

Picard: "But how can this be?"

Troi: "Oh it be. Somehow, in some way, flat screen monitors were better in the early 21st century than they are today."

 

[Nerf22]

Picard: *quickly closes window* Oh, counselor, I was just... going over the daily reports.

Troi: Uh huh.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Worf: "Stop it! Stop with the goofy faces! A Klingon warrior does not giggle!"

Picard: "My apologies for doubting your word, Commander. I concede, that definitely is you in a topless whip fight with Faye Dunaway! But...how...when...WHY?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Worf: "I was checking it. For lint."
Worf's Father: "And you hoped to burn the lint away with friction?"

Picard: "... Yes, I can see how you would interpret that video as being me backing away after installing a camera in your toilet."

Dorn: "Look, I didn't write the episode, dude."

Picard: "So it's true: Worf does weep after sex."
Troi: "Creeps me the hell out."

 

[SRFX]

Worf is shocked to find his parents are imprisoned in the Phantom Zone

Picard: "But I don't want to forward my ports! I just want to play BORDERLANDS online!"
Troi: "You'll also need to create a GameSpy account..."
Picard: "F#$%"

 

[Tom Riley]

TROI: You're right, that does look like Wesley sniffing your assless chaps...

 

[Captain Crow]

(gunshot)

Female voice: What happened?

Male voice: I just shot my foot by accident.

(Cheesy music being played on a cheap Casio keyboard)

Picard: And people in the twenty-first century found this shit funny?

Troi: Afraid so.

Worf: By Kahless! The "came with the frame" people have been brought to life in the real world.

Guy with Beard: Thats a mirror dumbass!

 

[tharpdevenport]

Worf: Singing, "I feel prett! Oh, so pretty! Pretty, and witty, and ga--"

Dad: "Ooohhh myyy..."

Watching the view from a hidden camera in Worf's quarters, on the computer

Picard: "Counselor, do you really think Mr. Worf feels, 'Pretty, witty, and gay?'?"

Troi: "There was certainly nothing 'gay' about what happened in my quarters last night..."