TNG Caption This #151 - "Twist and Caption"

[John Picard]

Riker (imitating Picard): "What do you think we should do, Number One?"

Data (imitating Riker): "I believe I should lead an away team and have sex with the female alien leader."

Riker (imitating Picard): "Capital idea, Commander. Make it so!"

Picard (off camera): "You...bastards."

BRILLIANT! I'm almost in tears from laughing at this one.

 

[cooleddie74]

WORF:"You two are talking about me behind my back...and in front of my face, no less!

You have no HONOR."

 

[cooleddie74]

"No good, sir.

Our tricorders haven't been calibrated to detect spray-painted styrofoam and plaster-of-paris."

 

[NathanielM]

Riker: Damn I wish i had deanna here right now... My hand is getting tired.

Data: "Definitely, sir. Let me do it with you!

Worf: You assholes.

 

[NathanielM]

Ensign: Sir We found the remains of the sex doll belonging to Shat and it appears to be that of Deanna Troi!

Riker: <over intercom> DAMN him!

 

[Voyager]

Riker: Stare off...
Data: I accept, you know I wont loose...
Worf: will you two make up and fucken kiss already?!

 

[LeadHead]

Riker: Data, how long have we been sitting here, staring at each other?
Data: 18 days, 16 hours and 47 minutes.
Worf: Would one of you just win already?

 

[cooleddie74]

RIKER:"Please Data.

DON'T ask me that again.

You know I don't swing that way."

 

[Tim]

Scenes from the long-lost episode, "Stewie's Arrow, Part I."

 

[Alrik]

Riker: "You are fully functional, aren't you?"
Data: "Of course, but..."
Riker: "How fully?"
Data: "In every way, of course. I have been programmed in multiple techniques, a broad variety of pleasuring...
Riker: "You jewel!"
Worf: "Screw this....I'm outta here."

 

[cultcross]

All done folks, the new contest is up!

 

[cooleddie74]

DATA:"There is ONE human activity I have engaged in that you have not, Commander.

I had sexual relations with Lieutenant Yar before her death."

RIKER:"Oh yeah? Worf had sexual relations with her AFTER her death. Why do you think he was banned from the funeral?"

 

[NathanielM]

Riker, Worf and Data (together):

We want you, we want you
we want you for the starfleet crew!

Data:

Where can you find pleasure
Search the planets for lifeforms
Learn Starship technology
Where can you begin to make your dreams all come true
On the bridge or the Academy
Where can you learn warp drive
Play on rec dec or shore leave
Study lifeform readings
Sign of for the science club
Or sit at your station at battlestations
When your ships and enemies meet

(Worf Riker and Data together)
In Starfleet,
Yes, you can explore far galaxies
In Starfleet,
Yes, you can put your mind at ease
In Starfleet,
Come on now, people, make a stand
In Starfleet, in Starfleet
Can't you see we need a hand
In Starfleet,
Come on, protect Federation Space
In Starfleet,
Come on and join your fellow man
In Starfleet
Come on people, and make a stand
In Starfleet, In Starfleet, in Starfleet

(Crew behind Worf) in Starfleeet.

They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit

Data: If you like adventure
Don't you wait to enter
The recruiting office fast
Don't you hesitate
There is no need to wait
They're signing up new crewman fast
Maybe you are too young
To join up today
Bout don't you worry 'bout a thing
For I'm sure there will be
Always a good space fleet
Protecting the Federation and allied Territories

(Worf Riker and Data together)

In Starfleet,
Yes, you can explore far galaxies
In Starfleet,
Yes, you can put your mind at ease
In Starfleet,
Come on now, people, make a stand
In Starfleet, in Starfleet
Can't you see we need a hand
In Starfleet,
Come on, protect Federation Space
In Starfleet,
Come on and join your fellow man
In Starfleet
Come on people, and make a stand
In Starfleet, In Starfleet, in Starfleet (in Starfleet.)

They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit

Wesley crusher (off camera) Who me?

(Data Riker and Worf):

They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit

Wesley crusher: (off screen) But, but but I'm afraid of alien lifeforms!.
Wesley crusher: (Off screen) Hey, hey look Man, I get space sick even watchin' it on the viewscreen!

Riker Worf and Data: They want you, they want you in Starfleet

Wesley Cruser: (Off Camera) oh my goodness. What am I gonna do on a Starship?