TNG Caption This #141 - "Lock n Load"
- Thread starter cultcross
- Start date
Not only was the common cold not cured until the 24th century, but Charlie Horses remained a problem as well.
"I will hold my breath until Geordi either acknowledges he loves me...or until the cosmos implodes in on itself. Whichever comes first."
DATA:"The Admiral was exposed to his aged wife's nudity unprepared...we must get him into a decon facility IMMEDIATELY."
Rigellian Diarrhea
The Silent Killer.
"Hi. I'm TV's Brent Spiner.
Stay tuned for more STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION on the Sci-Fi Channel while I go Number Two!"
And from that day forward, Data was no longer permitted to read from the children's section of the ship's library, no matter HOW much it improved his understanding of humanity. ... Notably the selection entitled "Let's Go Number Two Together".
JAMESON:"Why'd Tasha Yar have to get killed by a talking oil slick with the Grinch's voice?!
WHY?!?!?!?!?"
Despite the lack of an emotion chip during his early years aboard the Enterprise-D, Commander Data never failed to tear and choke up whenever an overhead commsystem would play "Wind Beneath My Wings."
Despite the lack of an emotion chip during his early years aboard the Enterprise-D, Commander Data never failed to tear and choke up whenever an overhead commsystem would play "Wind Beneath My Wings."
DATA: Stay strong CeeCee!! *sniffle*
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PICARD:"Captain to Enterprise...Doctor Crusher, prepare for an emergency medical beam-in!!!
Admiral Jameson saw a picture of Ambassador Troi naked!"
(*BELCHES*)
"Sorry, sirs.
Too much marshmelon creme soda."
Picard: "Data, what happened to this man? Is he physically injured?
Data: "No, sir."
Picard: "Did one of his family member's die?
Data: "No, sir."
Picard: "Then why is he so horribly distraught?"
Data: "He has been informed that Michael Phelps cannot win a 9th gold medal."
Picard: "Mr. Data, throw him out the nearest air lock."
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Picard: I know, Admiral, that this is a stressful situation for you. Here, let me hold your hand until reinforcements arrive.
Jameson: I appreciate the thought, Captain, but those are my testicles.
Mr. Data had looked forward to the Away Mission all day so he could practice the human phenomena known as "flatulence."
Data: "One moment, captin; I am expelling a foreign contaminant from my system."
Picard: "Wait -- from whe -- EW!"
Data: "How easily humans do it."
Admiral: "A -- and -- and then Berman took me to his office and said he was going to 'Give me a raise' and that I'd 'Go where no man has gone before'!!!"
Jameson: Oh... I shouldn't have had that bowl of Gunian's chili before we beamed down.
Data: Perhaps the admiral was right, I shouldn't have had Gunian's chili either. Oh...
Jameson: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Picard: Data, why is this man screaming?
Data: Sir, I'm afraid he was just subjected to watching the first seasons of TNG, DS9, and VOY in a loop for 3 days without stopping.
Picard: Oh, dear GOD! Picard to Enterprise! Dr. Crusher, we need an emergency beam-up, stat!