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Those Stupid Tables

SonicRanger

Rear Admiral
Rear Admiral
:wtf:

What were the designers thinking when they created tables with strange, uneven surfaces? Those do-nothing grooves seem to have no function other than making it easy to set your coffee or soup on a groove and spill it all over. It isn't just the mess hall tables -- the briefing room table has the senseless grooves too. The whole centers of the tables are useless. Go to iKea or any furnature store -- you'll never see a table with an uneven surface for good reason. A table must primarily serve as a flat, stable surface. Even alien designers in the 24th century shouldn't design uneven tables, especially on a starship. What the hell?

http://www.star-trek-voyager.net/ship4/ship2pix/mortal_cam_big.jpg
http://www.ussfortuna.com/Sub/images/Voyager_messhall.jpg
http://www.star-trek-voyager.net/btshtm/bts/btsbridge/briefingrm.jpg
 
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Its just a show. And voyager has enough issues for people to quip about those tables. Just because you don't see the reason for it doesn't mean there aren't any. Besides, the briefing room table isn't for eating. The grooves doesn't interfere with what normally goes on in there.
 
Its [sic] just a show...

Well, you could give such a trite answer for almost every thread here... but you're hanging out on Trek BBS, friend.

Besides, there were real-word designers who decided this was a good idea.

Besides, the briefing room table isn't for eating.

There were still plenty of coffee cups on it over the years.
 
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I got the impression that the mess hall tables had grooves that were intended to contain things like condiments, serving bowls, a vase of flowers... just extra stuff that would otherwise tend to get in the way.

I have no answer for the briefing room table. It looks like one of the dumbest table designs I've ever seen.
 
I liked them. The grooves gave perfect spots to start building up walls so that no one could see you talk to you as you ate. Too bad no one ever used that additional piece to so we could see the wall in action.
 
Wow that last one is really phallic!

Seems like the mess hall tables are IKEA tables that probably looked too IKEA so they modded them by cutting the edges and adding the groovey groove in the center.
 
:wtf:

What were the designers thinking when they created tables with strange, uneven surfaces?

It's called a 'design aesthetic,' and the tables worked perfectly well.

I suppose you wonder why women wear makeup...

What a specious comparison! :rolleyes:

Makeup isn't detrimental to a face's function (i.e., makeup doesn't make one mispronounce words), is usually culturally determined, and does important signaling about its wearer.

A big groove down the center of a small table does hurt its function. Like I said, go to IKEA or any other store. You will see many different "design aesthetics" there -- none will have uneven surfaces, though, because that's what a table is supposed to be: flat.
 
They are not tables. They are space-breakers to prevent crew demonstrations in the common area, which as you recall, was once the Captain's mess, naturally where such demonstrations were most likely to occur. The crew actually wasn't provided a mess, let alone tables. They were to suck rations standing at their posts 12 hours a day while their waste was beamed out in regular intervals, every 6 hours whether they needed to go or not.

As for the briefing room, that's to keep the Captain from taking naps. It's ergonomically impossible to find a comfortable position when sleeping or having nooners. See, they didn't know they'd be in deep space for so long.

It was all outlined in Caretaker part 3.
 
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One nice point to the groove...if you spill your hot coffee towards the groove, most of it will be directed to either side rather than to the hot chick you were trying to get a date with.
 
As I recall the mess hall was supposed to serve as an emergency first aid centre should they have to treat large numbers of casualties, so the groove is probably a place for the blood to flow away. :(
 
As I recall the mess hall was supposed to serve as an emergency first aid centre should they have to treat large numbers of casualties, so the groove is probably a place for the blood to flow away. :(

Yes and the groove in the briefing room table is an urethra.
 
Those stupid grooves bugged me as well. I think they're used though to seperate the tables a bit. :) But that's a dumb blonde answer. :lol: Anyway, I did like how they were designed..thx for the pics too..I sure do miss those sets! :(
 
The grooves were meant for people to dump their trash. The Starfleet bus boy would come along and simply scoop the detriment into his tray. Everything in Starfleet is ergonomic, you see.

Seriously, I thought that the tables were perfect hazard for spilling stuff. As for the conference table, I had heard rumors that the circle at the end of the table was supposed to have been for a holographic device. Those, however, were just rumors and cannot be confirmed.
 
The grooves were meant for people to dump their trash. The Starfleet bus boy would come along and simply scoop the detriment into his tray. Everything in Starfleet is ergonomic, you see.

Seriously, I thought that the tables were perfect hazard for spilling stuff. As for the conference table, I had heard rumors that the circle at the end of the table was supposed to have been for a holographic device. Those, however, were just rumors and cannot be confirmed.

I also think that they were a spilling hazard as well. I also wondered what the groove in the middle of the briefing room table was used for as well??? I guess to make it look more futuristic??? *shrugs* Anyway, still loved Voyager and all of it's flaws. :D
 
^^^

It would've been hard to pass something across the conference table too.

"Paris, toss me that PADD!"
 
Of all the things to get wound up about :rommie:

If you watch the extra features on the season 1 DVDs, they explain that the tables were originally all groove. Before Genevieve Bujold walked out during filming of Caretaker, they had to quickly re-design the set using MORE metallic-painted wood on the tables to distract the cast and crew from how bad Bujold was as Janeway. In later seasons, the three dimensionality of the tables also gave a sense of depth and the metallic finish helped the set seem less wooden in any and all scenes involving Chakotay.

This was accomplished by the addition of 38% more table throughout the ship.

Also, the grooves give the tables a Sombrero-like appearance. Which I believe many people on here find aesthetically pleasing.

The reason Tuvok's and Paris's pips are changed early on is because they needed more wood to finish the briefing room table. And the lights at Ops and Tactical were changed from spotlights to fluroescent strips so the spotlights could be used as cupholders.

These cupholders were supposed to spring forth from the grooves, but were, unfortunately, canned in favour of Insurrection's Manual Steering Column and that odd laptop Chakotay hammers at next to his seat to make it look like he was doing something.
 
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Of all the things to get wound up about :rommie:

If you watch the extra features on the season 1 DVDs, they explain that the tables were originally all groove. Before Genevieve Bujold walked out during filming of Caretaker, they had to quickly re-design the set using MORE metallic-painted wood on the tables to distract the cast and crew from how bad Bujold was as Janeway. In later seasons, the three dimensionality of the tables also gave a sense of depth and the metallic finish helped the set seem less wooden in any and all scenes involving Chakotay.

This was accomplished by the addition of 38% more table throughout the ship.

Also, the grooves give the tables a Sombrero-like appearance. Which I believe many people on here find aesthetically pleasing.

The reason Tuvok's and Paris's pips are changed early on is because they needed more wood to finish the briefing room table. And the lights at Ops and Tactical were changed from spotlights to fluroescent strips so the spotlights could be used as cupholders.

These cupholders were supposed to spring forth from the grooves, but were, unfortunately, canned in favour of Insurrection's Manual Steering Column and that odd laptop Chakotay hammers at next to his seat to make it look like he was doing something.

Thanks for answering some questions that have nagged me since Caretaker 3! You know, the one with the 4h competition, where Harry's prize sheep Tinkerbell wins the blue ribbon.

The laptop on Chakotay's right was originally a CB radio, which "coincidentally" was noticed missing shortly after Ms Bujold's departure. It was replaced by a cigar box, a stock ticker, and a magazine rack before the producers finally settled on a computer interface (in order to appease the Okudas' legal team). However the cost of the interface explains the lack of hatrack in either the bridge or Captain's ready room, which was instead referenced only through dialogue; as were certain members of the cast, such as Chakotay and the irrepressible Lt Shlomo.

Ms Bujold's pilot series starring her as a sassy back-talking trucker who harbors an orangutan was alas, not picked up. But she would later find success as the Commander of a Battlestar.
 
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