The Dating Advice and Support Thread

[Mr. Laser Beam]

I have met someone who I like a lot (and who I admit I have had a crush on from the get-go). The problem is not that she is divorced and has a kid. I think I can deal with that. The problem is that her sister is married to my brother. I'm worried about that looking 'tacky'.

She is also taller than me.

I'd find a woman taller than me fairly sexy, actually. I think I'd like that.

Oh, don't misunderstand me on that point, I like it too! I'm 6'5" so I rarely find women that tall.

 

[RoJoHen]

I have met someone who I like a lot (and who I admit I have had a crush on from the get-go). The problem is not that she is divorced and has a kid. I think I can deal with that. The problem is that her sister is married to my brother. I'm worried about that looking 'tacky'.

She is also taller than me.

I'd find a woman taller than me fairly sexy, actually. I think I'd like that.

Oh, don't misunderstand me on that point, I like it too! I'm 6'5" so I rarely find women that tall.

I think I would find a woman that tall a little frightening.

 

[Trekker4747]

Amazon Eve, tell me that wouldn't drive you wild.

 

[Finn]

I like nice guys. One guy couldn't figure out why I was into him and I told him that he was the sweetest guy I had ever met.

The Hubby?

 

[Kestra]

I like nice guys. One guy couldn't figure out why I was into him and I told him that he was the sweetest guy I had ever met.

The Hubby?

Nope. He's got other good qualities though, and can be sweet as well.

 

[Sean Aaron]

Somehow I think that "being a nice guy" has nothing to do with "never getting the girl".

I doubt there's a causality there but it's probably easier to think that than to think about what real issues one has that causes them to "never get the girl".

Being too nice probably isn't one of them.

Let me just say that there's a tendency around here to confuse "doormat with no self-esteem" with being a "nice guy." They are not the same thing.

I think you're both right; could be a pollution of the popular consciousness with popular media images of "nice guys" who are also doormats or awkward with "nice" being a "polite" label.

In my own little world, I've discovered that changing your Facebook status to "In a Relationship with..." is a modern rite of passage. I guess giving your girl your class ring is in the dustbin of cultural history now?

 

[Finn]

^I don't know anybody who has a class ring, not for the past 15 years

 

[Sean Aaron]

I had a friend that bought one - never saw the point of them myself - nice cultural reference though!

 

[SPCTRE]

Amazon Eve, tell me that wouldn't drive you wild.

Sweet Jesus, 2.03m

I'm 1.93m and tall women (i.e. +1.80m) drive me crazy already, but man, she would actually look down on me. How awesome and weird would that be!

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I never had a class ring.

But I did change my FB status once I noticed my girlfriend changed hers.

 

[Sean Aaron]

But I did change my FB status once I noticed my girlfriend changed hers.

It was a defining moment. I did mine first; she noticed and said "Wow, it's official then?"

 

[SPCTRE]

In my own little world, I've discovered that changing your Facebook status to "In a Relationship with..." is a modern rite of passage.

Urgh, don't get me started, that's how my last girlfriend broke up

 

[Robert Maxwell]

In my own little world, I've discovered that changing your Facebook status to "In a Relationship with..." is a modern rite of passage.

Urgh, don't get me started, that's how my last girlfriend broke up

Really? Here's how I see the scale of break-up methods, from "best" to "worst":

1. Face-to-face. Really, this is ideal, but sometimes not gonna happen.
2. Video chat. Don't we love this age of Interwebs? Now you can see someone's face as you dump them and then disconnect when they start to cry.
3. Phone. If you can't do it face-to-face, at least do it by voice.
4. Text message or email. Not at all classy, but hey, at least you sent it to them personally.
5. Facebook status or Twitter post. Extra points if it's public and everyone sees it. Congratulations, you're an asshole.
6. Removing relationship status from Facebook without saying anything. Wow. You must've been a joy to be with.
7. Not saying anything at all, just ignoring phone calls, texts, emails, and knocks at your door. Fuck you.

(Snail mail letters excluded because, let's face it, who does that anymore?)

 

[JoeZhang]

8. Pretending to die.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Good call, sir.

 

[Vendikarr]

In my own little world, I've discovered that changing your Facebook status to "In a Relationship with..." is a modern rite of passage.

Urgh, don't get me started, that's how my last girlfriend broke up

Really? Here's how I see the scale of break-up methods, from "best" to "worst":

1. Face-to-face. Really, this is ideal, but sometimes not gonna happen.
2. Video chat. Don't we love this age of Interwebs? Now you can see someone's face as you dump them and then disconnect when they start to cry.
3. Phone. If you can't do it face-to-face, at least do it by voice.
4. Text message or email. Not at all classy, but hey, at least you sent it to them personally.
5. Facebook status or Twitter post. Extra points if it's public and everyone sees it. Congratulations, you're an asshole.
6. Removing relationship status from Facebook without saying anything. Wow. You must've been a joy to be with.
7. Not saying anything at all, just ignoring phone calls, texts, emails, and knocks at your door. Fuck you.

(Snail mail letters excluded because, let's face it, who does that anymore?)

You forgot 3a. Leaving them a message on their answering machine/voicemail.

beep.. "Um hi, it's me. Yea, I don't think things are working out between us. I think we should see other people. bye."

 

[{ Emilia }]

9. Whacking him over the head at night with a club, then cut him into pieces, dig a hole in the garden and bury the pieces in little plastic bags.

 

[Vendikarr]

9. Whacking him over the head at night with a club, then cut him into pieces, dig a hole in the garden and bury the pieces in little plastic bags.

This method is not for me. Being willing to spend the rest of my life in prison over someone is too big of a committment.

 

[{ Emilia }]

9. Whacking him over the head at night with a club, then cut him into pieces, dig a hole in the garden and bury the pieces in little plastic bags.

This method is not for me. Being willing to spend the rest of my life in prison over someone is too big of a committment.

Well, honestly the only option in Robert Maxwell's list I can imagine using is #1.

 

[SPCTRE]

9. Whacking him over the head at night with a club, then cut him into pieces, dig a hole in the garden and bury the pieces in little plastic bags.

This method is not for me. Being willing to spend the rest of my life in prison over someone is too big of a committment.

Well, honestly the only option in Robert Maxwell's list I can imagine using is #1.

I suggest we get together and break up immediately, which would instantly make it to the #1 spot on my "least terrible break-ups" list.