TAS Caption Contest #29: Just for Laughs

[Isis]

Spock: "Captain, do you have to sound the Red Alert just as I start applying my facial mask?"

Annoyed crewman: "Thanks a lot! When I said I could really use some grass, this wasn't what I meant!"

Kirk: "Not again. I think it's fair to say that we're all sick of 'Galaxy Quest' as the in-flight movie."

 

[T'Girl]

Kirk: "Since Alex started to sit in the middle of navigation, I can't see the viewscreen anymore.

McCoy: "Just lean over to one side and stop belly-aching."

 

[T'Mar]

Guys! Taking an elevator through the hedge maze is CHEATING!

 

[Nerys Myk]

Sulu suddenly realised he had mistakenly put his Wrigley's Pleasure Planet vacation video on screen.

 

[Isis]

1974:

...

Announcer: "In this episode, the part of Captain Kirk is played by Jack Lord's toupee."
SULU: I think I'm going to be sick...

2010:

Announcer: "In this episode, the part of Captain Kirk is played by Rod Blagojevich's toupee."

 

[LeadHead]

Scotty: Well at least the gravity didn't go offline when I was in the shower, that would be embarrassing.

Archer: Shut up!

Spock: Doctor McCoy, You have no given my Vulcan Logic a Black Eye, oh.

McCoy: Excuse me, I planning a romantic moment.

Security: I know, you're under arrest.

Announcer: In this episode the part of Captain Kirk will be played by old sound clips found on the internet.


Sulu: Captain, we're detecting an alien ship, should we investigate it?

Kirk: RISK IS OUR BUSINESS!

Uhura: Captain, starfleet wants to know who we found on the Botany Bay.

Kirk: KHAAAAAAAN!

 

[WRStone]

This week in Unnecessary Censorship: September 21, 1974 edition.

 

[TigerOfDarkness]

Kirk (off-screen): Mr Spock, please give us your weather report which will be 100% accurate as usual...

(Thanks to DakataSmith for the inspiration)

Kirk: What is it, Bones?
McCoy: Some strange virus I've never seen before - it's playing havoc with the crew's eyebrows!

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk (off camera): "I warned you not to go mixing Romulan ale and Aldeberran whiskey."

Hung-Over Spock: "Fuck you."

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: Oh, goody! Scotty is dry humping the ceiling girders again. Somebody get my squirt bottle.

 

[mirandafave]

Whilst there was little to be thankful about on the day the artificial gravity mucked up, one thing everyone was grateful for was the fact Scotty wasn't wearing his kilt.

 

[TigerOfDarkness]

Ceiling Scotty was surprised to find that no-one was masturbating.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SCOTTY: Repairs complete Captain, artificial gravity is back on..... shite!