TAS Caption Contest #19: Freaky

[Rat Boy]

Hi again. With Shatmandu still sorting out his bag of cats, I've decided to help out again and keep the contest going. First up, let's celebrate...

For explaining why Scotty would later have a bias against shafts, our winner is...

Kirk: "Where'd this come from?"

Scotty: "Oh, that, it was delivered by the Neptune Boon Corporation as a replacement for the one they gave us a few years back."

Kirk: "So, what you're saying is that we've been shafted by NBC again."

Scotty: "Aye, Sir."

For proving that proper punctuation and spacing is key, our winner is...

Spock: "It appears to be a message from one of Mr. Scott's ancestors, Captain. "You can not touch this". Signed, McHammer..."

And our Photoshop winner and by "winner" I mean "only entry..."

THE DOCTOR: Martha, in the future I'd prefer all changes to the TARDIS and any new companions come through me.

Congrats, folks. This week, we feature a couple of stills that could only have happened in an animated production...or at least until the advent of CGI. First, it looks like the humans on the Planet of the Apes got unionized. Second, Kirk is about to discover that once you go squid, you don't go back. Have fun:

 

[Rat Boy]

Human Foreman: "Well, I guess we can just leave that Statue of Liberty replica on the beach. Not like anyone's going to raise a stink about it."

Kirk: "I wouldn't mind this so much unless you stop using your Super Friends announcer voice."

 

[Nerys Myk]

Even Kirk had to draw the line somewhere.

 

[Captain Crow]

The Man with the Yellow Hat: Get the fuck out of here or I'll get Curious George and Marvin the Paranoid Monkey-Dog Man Thing here to kick your ass!

The Man with the Yellow Hat: Do you have any idea what it's like to be stuck in a cramped three seater shuttlecraft for two weeks with the smell of wet dog hair!

 

[Rat Boy]

Human Foreman: "Really, who puts an A-Bomb in a church?"

Fake Carter Winston: "And did you ever notice that Anne has almost the exact same voice as Uhura?"

 

[Mysterion]

KIRK: Note to self - change profile on e-Harmony ASAP!

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Hentai monster: No need to cry. I promise to be gentle with my tentacles, captain.

 

[Nerys Myk]

YELLOW HAT:I'm adopted???!!!

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Guy in hardhat: "'Nice headlight'? Is that some kind of crack about my tits?!"

Kirk (presses intercom button): "Mr. Spock, concerning this Argelian floor lamp you gave me for my birthday...I'm usually all in favor of user-friendly appliances, but this is just too much..."

 

[Deranged Nasat]

Visitors arrive at the mining outpost...

Guy in hardhat: "It looks like one of them there woman things. Well, I'll be damned.

Ursinoid: "We told you boys they are no myth".

...and so, due to being found guilty as charged of grade-one theft, espionage and violation of the Neutral Zone during the so-called "Enterprise Incident", Captain James T. Kirk receives the merciless tyranny of Romulan justice....

Judge: "We hereby sentence Kirk to toupee reconfiguration. For as long as the rest of your natural life, you shall wear nought but a heavy, ugly black bowel cut wig".

Kirk: *nearly breaks down*

Vendorian agent: "There there. There there."

 

[milo bloom]

Hentai monster: No need to cry. I promise to be gentle with my tentacles, captain.

Kirk: And you'd better watch it with that potty-tentacle too!

 

[Mr. Adventure]

"Haha, put a drop of crazy glue on my hat and leave me stuck hanging on a girder all night? Well, me and my boys are here to get a little payback."

"Hey, it happens to all guys at some point."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Hardhat: "What do you mean, you didn't want your Wookiees shaved?"

Ventusian Ambassador os: "Good grief man! What are you doing with my pet?!"
Kirk: "Pet!? Aw crap! I thought this was your wife!"

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Ventusian: "See, you're a real <hic> buddy 'n, 'n, I just wanted to <hic> say I love you."
Kirk: "ggggnnnng... <snore>"

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Apes: [in unison] Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
Oh... Dr. Zaius
Ape: Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius.


YELLOW HAT: "You'll never make a monkey out of meDr. Zaius!"

 

[Rat Boy]

Non sequiter post!

I want to thank my parents for making my transition into my 30s as smooth and as fun as possible. You guys rock!!!!!

 

[Isis]

Police lineup on Planet of the Retards

 

[Rat Boy]

Foreman: "Good God, never let Rat Boy have Jack Daniel's and Nyquil at the same time."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: Bones is right; I need sex rehab.

 

[Rat Boy]

Foreman: "Man, Star Trek can't even catch a break with the new expanded best picture category."