PROJECT: POTEMKIN
"Holding Pattern"
Ep #S-03A
Written by David Eversole
Directed by Randall Landers
There's a lot to like in this latest outing from the crew of Project: Potemkin. And while nothing's perfect, I found this latest adventure to be the most satisfying of all the shorts and episodes they've produced thus far.
Technically, there's tons of room for improvement.
Almost immediately after the main titles, the audio leaps out and calls attention to itself. It's certainly better done here than in previous shows, but there's definitely also much room for improvement. The sound mix seemed to be haphazard as well. Perhaps its just the settings on my laptop, but while some audio was indiscernible, the music cues would be blaring, particularly the Vulcan "horn" tracks.
While some of the dialogue is inaudible at times, the major crime here is really how distinctly the ADR'd lines come across, particularly in the beginning of the show. I'm not sure if later, when Grigory first appears if his voice is supposed to reverb/echo the way it does (all signs point to the actual location where Grigory, Perez and T'Noshi are being outdoors) but it doesn't stick through his scenes either, so I can't be certain if it was intended, or just a side effect of Jeffrey Green's scenes being shot against a green screen and apart from the others. The point is, I applaud the improvement in audio but also encourage and hope that the production team will continue to work to improve their sound design in these shorts. As
Maurice always says (and whole-heartedly agree with him),
"Sound trumps picture!"
Framing an composition in this episode were all over the place. Too much head room:
Not sure why there ever would be a shot like this in a Star Trek fan film:
And here, there's just so much wasted space on the right of the screen:
None of these are egregious; just noticeable and could be easily remedied with a little more planning, perhaps even storyboarding beforehand so you know what shots you want to get, and how to block out your actors to best suit what you're trying to capture with the scene.
Other minor technical nitpicks:
--The lighting is obviously mismatched between T'Noshi and Geronimo (on location) and Grigory (on the green screen). After years of watching Hidden Frontier and their various spinoffs, it's nothing new but still, something to look out for in future installments.
--I'm not altogether sure why T'Noshi and Geronimo go for their stroll in the muddy swamp/forest. Too, and perhaps more damning, the audio is really difficult to understand here.
I get that it's for all intents and purposes a dream sequence, and the rain adds to that, but the sudden jump from the hotel/apartment to the forest and then back again without any explanation or reason was a bit jarring. More so, because even though the clear intention here was to show it was raining, both T'Noshi and Geronimo are clearly dry in these scenes :
(Also worth noting the continuity error here -- T'Noshi starts on the left, then after we see Grigory, suddenly she's on the right. Easily fixed by planning ahead and having a continuity person with you to track these sorts of things)
Later, it's even more obvious when T'Noshi wakes up and converses with Grigory about what's really going on:
---...whereas Grigory looks like he's been in spin class all day when he finally has his scenes with T'Noshi:
Again, nothing major, not anything that ruins the overall parts that I liked, but these minor things, this "inattentive blindness," so to speak, to such minor detail can take you right out of the film.
--The character of Geronimo is entirely nonplussed through the entire piece. I don't know if it's just Aaron Renfroe's performance, or if he was directed this way, or if he's just not as experienced or naturally talented an actor as Woods and Green, but it sticks out like a sore thumb here. About the only real emotional response we get is when there's the slightest hint or reference to sex the night before (in the dream sequence.) The rest of the time it's hard to tell if he even really cares about what's going on.
--The "jump-cut-as-visual-effect" attempt here is admirable, but it's not edited quickly enough to not call attention to itself. It's certainly executed well enough that I get what was being attempted, but the cuts are sluggish enough that I can plainly see these shots would have benefited greatly from an edit that's just a smidge tighter.
* * *
On the complete flip side of that last point, there are several shots that hold on for a while. I'm not convinced this is a bad thing. In some cases, it's quite brilliant. Too often, I've noticed some editors and directors who just don't give their scenes and actor's performances "room to breathe" and it's frustrating because those extra moments, those little bits that aren't scripted but just the actor or actors reacting in their own way to what's going on, sometimes those moments are entirely worth keeping. Really, the only shot like this I think that went overboard was at the end, when the camera stayed on Grigory for so long before the end credits began. (Quick fix: move the "Directed by" title to the end of the guest titles after the main title sequence.)
Ok. If you've suffered through this review to this point, I have good news: the rest of the review is about what I liked:
First and foremost, we are treated to a marvelous, shiny new opening title sequence by Chris Cameron. There wasn't really anything wrong with the old one, but this new version was a pleasant surprise and quite delightful to watch. The visuals are striking and work well to set the tone of the show. More importantly, it presents a real feeling and vibe more akin to
Star Trek: The Motion Picture than the later TOS films, which I also dig. Bravo.
The production has retained Andrew Morgan Smith's main theme for Potemkin, which is also fine by me. Dammit if I haven't tried, but no matter what I do, I can't seem to get that theme out of my head sometimes. It's quite catchy (but dramatic) and memorable which is a good thing. My only gripe with it would just be that it becomes readily apparent the brass section of theme isn't a real brass performance, but like the themes from
Starship Exeter and
Star Trek: Intrepid, this one sticks with you. I like it when that happens.
The episode title credit over black before the action begins is a nice touch as well, reminiscent of the old Battlestar Galactica, Knight Rider, and Buck Rogers shows from the late '70s and early '80s I grew up watching and loving. It's a simple effect, but one that really carries a lot of weight.
Christin Woods' performance in this piece starts out as her performances usually do, but I found her ultimate choice and reaction to that choice to be quite effective
and affective. It's certainly a new experience for T'Noshi, and I'll be very interested to see how this character progresses in future episodes because of what happens here. The effortless switch in the mind meld scene from the joy she clearly feels describing the long and fruitful life Geronimo and "Tina" have together as he passes to the utter devastation she then feels is heartwrenching to behold. Well done to all for that scene; it sells the piece entirely and makes the rest of the episode worth the experience. The only way it could have been better would have been to give us a closeup of T'Noshi in that moment but as it is, it's exquisite.
Overall, as I said, I enjoyed this outing. The idea of a device that lets you recreate your perfect reality as you are dying is hardly a new one but is nevertheless used quite effectively here and more importantly, used well to advance and develop one of the main characters of the show. The strength of this piece is absolutely in the writing and while there's room for improvement on the technical side, you guys are consistently doing better with each outing on this front.
Well done all, and congrats on a successful episode!
