Originally posted on fanfiction.net - Link.
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A Shift in Sickbay
“Hello, Doctor!” Tendi chirped entering Sickbay. Only two biobeds were currently occupied by patients. “Ensign D’Vana Tendi, reporting for duty.”
“Tendi,” T’Ana grunted working in her office. “You know, you don’t have to say that every time you arrive for your shift.”
“Oh, I don’t mind,” Tendi smiled. “It’s my duty to display a degree of professionalism and show proper respect towards senior officers…”
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” T’Ana brusquely cut her off. “Start running an immunogenicity analysis on Batch Six-E of the collected tissue samples from yesterday.”
“Yes, sir!” Tendi beamed happily moving to a laboratory station. “Okay you little cell clusters. Let’s see what kind of fun tests I get to run on you today.” She began humming to herself.
“Oooh, is there a doctor in the house?” Jet lurched into Sickbay with his face all red and puffy. “My mucus membranes are working overtime.”
“They aren’t the only ones,” T’Ana growled working a padd. “I’ll see to you in a second. Right after I finish updating this electroencephalography scan.”
“Don’t worry, doctor. I’ll run a preliminary check on him,” Tendi quickly volunteered and approached Jet. “Wow, what happened to you?”
“Dunno,” Jet wheezed as Tendi gently led him to a biobed. “I was perfectly fine yesterday. Woke up this morning feeling all itchy and puffy.”
“Hmmm. That’s odd,” Tendi commented examining him. “Have you eaten or been exposed to anything new or unusual recently?”
“Well, I did go on a date with Ensign Ramga last night,” Jet thought for a moment.
“The Phylosian in Tactical?” Tendi inquired.
“Yep,” Jet nodded. “We went back to her place afterwards where we enjoyed spreading her petals and blooming her blossom if you get my drift.”
“Oooh! Way to go, Jet!” An unseen medical technician cheered.
“Aw, that’s nice,” Tendi commented casually while scanning him. “Wait, did she spray any of her spores or pollen on you?”
“Well, yeah,” Jet coughed as T’Ana joined them. “Among other things…”
“Aha, that’s it!” Tendi exclaimed showing T’Ana her tricorder. “Looks like he’s allergic to Phylosian pollen.”
“I agree,” T’Ana studied the readings and sniffed Jet in confirmation. “Your Defensive Denobulan impression is due to a severe sinus infection.”
“Huh, imagine that,” Jet rasped. “So, what’s the treatment, Doc? DNA therapy? Nasal surgery?”
“No, nothing that drastic,” T’Ana instructed Tendi to prepare a hypospray. “A few doses of antihistamines and numinol tetraminothen will have you back to normal. Just stay away from Phylosian pollen from now on.”
“Gee, guess that means I won’t be going out with Ramga again. Too bad. She’s such a nice person,” Jet sighed as Tendi hypoed him. The redness and swelling immediately began to fade. “Ahhh, that’s great! I feel better already. Thanks, Doc. D’Vana.”
“Happy to help,” Tendi beamed as Jet hopped off the biobed and exited Sickbay. “Ah, that was fun! My first independent Cerritos medical diagnosis.”
“Good job, Tendi,” T’Ana said absently. “Now get back to work.”
“Right,” Tendi nodded heading back towards the lab station.
“Hi there!” A Jefferies tube hatch popped open allowing Rutherford to stick his head into Sickbay. “Don’t mind me. Just stopping in for a visit.”
“Not again!” T’Ana snapped stepping out of the way. “How many times have I told you not to do that anymore, Ensign? Come in through the doors like a normal person!”
“Sorry,” Rutherford apologized. “I’ll try to do so in the future,”
“Hi, Rutherford!” Tendi greeted. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh, I was just in the area resynching live power couplings,” Rutherford said emerging from the tube. “One of them suffered a brief overload and my arm got kind of fried.”
“Oh my gosh!” Tendi gasped at Rutherford’s scorched and charred arm. “We’ve got to treat that right away!”
“Oh, there’s no hurry,” Rutherford assured her as Tendi hauled him onto a biobed. “I’m already ahead of schedule and I wouldn’t want to cut in line ahead of any other patients.”
“There aren’t any other patients ahead of you right now,” T’Ana growled as she and Tendi began to quickly treat Rutherford’s burns.
“Doesn’t it hurt?” Tendi winced at the burned skin.
“Na, the electrical discharge from the power overload zapped all the nerves in my arm rendering it completely numb,” Rutherford explained cheerfully. “The surge protectors in my implant protected it from getting fried. Oh, and they protected the rest of my brain too.”
“What’s left of it,” T’Ana muttered.
“I see,” Tendi handed T’Ana a dermal regenerator. “Glad you’re putting your recent Sickbay experience to good use.”
“Yep, I figure my nerves will start regaining their normal function any second now…AAAHHHHHH!” Rutherford yelped. “Oh man, that hurts! The pain! The pain! Yeeeooowww!”
“Oops! Sorry!” Tendi quickly gave him a hypo of anesthetic. “Better?”
“Much,” Rutherford sighed in relief. “Thanks.”
“You were darn lucky this time, Ensign,” T’Ana grunted as she finished healing Rutherford’s arm. “Most of your wounds were superficial. Another few milliamps and that power coupling would have cooked you like a badly replicated pot roast. Be more careful in the future.”
“Okey-dokey,” Rutherford nodded inspecting his burned sleeve. “Better go change my uniform before getting back to work.” He glanced at Tendi. “Wanna meet up for lunch later?”
“You bet,” Tendi grinned.
“Great. See ya!” Rutherford smiled heading back towards the Jefferies tube hatch.
“Use the doors!” T’Ana snapped at him. “And go easy on that arm!”
“Oh. Right,” Rutherford sheepishly closed the hatch before exiting Sickbay through said doors.
“Gee, I hope Rutherford will be okay,” Tendi fretted putting medical instruments away. “He really needs to take better care of himself. Last time he got hurt in the Jefferies tubes he waited until the end of his shift before getting all his cuts and blisters treated. Then he had to climb back in and clean up all the blood and puss he left all over the ship.”
“Accckkk! Help!” Lieutenant Levy ran into Sickbay with a panicked look on his face. “Somebody help me!”
“Oh great. What is it this time?” T’Ana growled irritably.
“Doc! Something weird is happening to me!” Levy shouted clutching his temples. “I’m hearing strange voices in my head and they’re speaking an unknown alien language!”
“Really?” Tendi blinked. “Oooo, how exciting!”
“They’re broadcasting messages directly into my brain!” Levy yelped looking paranoid. “They’re trying to drive me crazy!”
“You’re already crazy!” T’Ana snapped pushing him onto a biobed. “And you need to already have a brain in order for something to mess with it.”
“It’s a conspiracy I tell you!” Levy babbled as T’Ana began scanning him with a tricorder. “It could be a new form of telepathic attack or subliminal messages being conveyed via an implanted neural transponder!”
“Or a simple case of tinnitus,” T’Ana grunted diagnosing the problem. “Just like it was the last three times this month!”
“THAT’S JUST WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK!” Levy yelled. “IT’S A CONSPIRACY I TELL YOU! TINNITUS IS A MEDICAL HOAX! A SECRET ORGANIZATION INSIDE STARFLEET IS USING IT TO COVER UP THE TRUTH! BEWARE! BEWARE!”
“Be quiet and hold still so I can treat you!” T’Ana snapped and signaled Tendi as she ran a sonic modulator over Levy’s ear. “Call Security and have them escort this nut out of my Sickbay.”
“Uh, right,” Tendi blinked doing so.
“YOU CAN’T STOP ME! THE TRUTH MUST BE TOLD!” Levy howled as a security team quickly arrived and dragged him out the doors. “SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES ARE AN INSIDE JOB! LITERALLY!”
“I swear, the only thing worse than paperwork is dealing with the lunatics I have to serve with,” T’Ana grumbled heading back to her office. “Now I have to update Levy’s medical profile to include paranoid delusions.”
“That’s one way to put it,” Tendi commented shaking her head. “Huh, a secret organization operating inside Starfleet. What are the chances of that?”
“Wow, what was all that about?” Boimler asked entering Sickbay. “Did Levy have another one of his crazy conspiracy attacks?”
“Sorry. Doctor-patient confidentiality prevents me from saying,” Tendi replied diplomatically. “So, what brings you here?”
“I’ve been feeling kinda funny lately,” Boimler said taking a seat on a biobed. “Dizziness, palpitations, sweaty palms, blurred vision. At first I thought Mariner had just put Garanian bolites in my bed again, but…”
“Well, do you look a little greener than usual,” Tendi smiled scanning him. “It looks on you…uh oh.”
“Uh oh?” Boimler gulped. “What’s ‘uh oh’?”
“Um, probably nothing,” Tendi laughed nervously. “Doctor T’Ana, can you come look at this?”
“Now what?” T’Ana grunted coming over. Tendi showed her the tricorder. “Oh great! How did that happen?”
“What?” Boimler asked anxiously. “How did what happen?”
“Looks like you somehow managed to contract Terrellian Death Syndrome, Ensign,” T’Ana informed him.
“WHAT?!” Boimler yelped. “AAAHHHHHH! HELP! NO! I’M GONNA DIE!”
“You’re not going to die!” T’Ana snapped. “Not unless you keep annoying the heck out of me!”
“But Terrelian Death Syndrome is fatal!” Boimler babbled hysterically. “It causes irreversible cellular degradation! I read about in the Starfleet Medical Database!”
“That’s Terrelian Death Syndrome,” T’Ana explained. “This is Terrellian Death Syndrome. It’s completely different.”
“It is?” Boimler blinked hopefully. “But they sound so similar.”
“Only to the auditory insensitive,” T’Ana muttered sending Tendi to the supply closet. “Terrellian Death Syndrome is much rarer than Terrelian Death Syndrome. And it is far more deadly…”
“AAAGGGHHHHHH! I KNEW IT!” Boimler cried. “HELP! I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!”
“Calm down! Let me finish!” T’Ana shouted. “Terrellian Death Syndrome is far more deadly when left untreated. Fortunately, the cure can be easily synthesized and we have a few already prepared doses in stock.”
“Oh,” Boimler blushed as Tendi shot him with a hypospray. “That’s pleasantly unexpected.”
“There. Your Terrellian Death Syndrome troubles are over,” T’Ana waved him off heading back to her office. “Unlike me. I’m the one who now has to implement a ship-wide health and biofilter check to make sure there aren’t any other cases of it aboard the Cerritos.”
“Right. Thanks,” Boimler sighed heading for the doors. “See you later, Tendi.”
“Bye Boimler,” Tendi waved. “Feel free to come by again soon!”
“Ohhhh,” A young, heavily wounded Bajoran painfully limped into Sickbay. He had a black eye, torn uniform, twisted arm, obviously broken leg and was bleeding profusely from multiple lacerations. “Help me…”
“Oh my gosh!” Tendi gasped. “Doctor T’Ana, you’re needed out here, stat!”
“What is it?” T’Ana took one look at the young man and quickly sprang into action. “Get him on a biobed! Nurse Westlake, prep the surgical suite!”
“Yes, doctor!” Westlake swiftly moved to do so.
“I’m reading multiple contusions, three broken ribs, internal bleeding,” T’Ana ran a tricorder over the young man. “Ten cc’s of coranalin!”
“Yes, doctor,” Tendi quickly prepped and administered the hypo into the Bajoran’s neck. “What happened to you? Are we under attack? Have aliens boarded the ship? Did Shaxs run you through one of his intense training programs?”
“No. Food fight,” The young Bajoran moaned. “They’re serving real carnitas in the Mess Hall with homemade guacamole, but there wasn’t enough pico de gallo to go around…”
“WHAT?!” Half the medical staff yelled. “LET ME AT IT!”
“You can all stuff your faces later!” T’Ana snapped. “Right after you finish patching this idiot up. Just make sure you save some carnitas meat for me!”
“Yes, doctor!” The entire medical staff began working at record speed.
“Bridge to Sickbay! Medical emergency!” Lieutenant Shaxs’ voice boomed over the comm. “Prepare to receive casualties!”
“Understood. Standing by,” T’Ana tapped her combadge. “Everyone, drop what you’re doing, stabilize your patients and get ready to act!”
“Yes, doctor,” Tendi braced herself as the prone forms of Captain Freeman and Commander Ransom materialized inside Sickbay via transporter.
“What happened?” T’Ana immediately began scanning them with a tricorder.
“Preliminary administrative meeting gone wrong,” Lieutenant Commander Billups reported having transported in as well. “One minute we were discussing possible engineering updates with the local Rigellian council. The next thing I knew Captain Freeman and Commander Ransom had been knocked to the floor with bite marks on their necks.”
“The Rigellians attacked the captain and first officer?” Tendi gasped in shock.
“No, their pet Berengarian dragon-snake did,” Billups explained. “One of the Rigellian officials brought it along to the meeting. He said the dragon-snake was just being friendly. Its bites were signs of affection.”
“More like infection,” T’Ana studied her tricorder. “I’m reading concentrated levels of a highly complex neurotoxin in both their wounds. It’s attacking their nervous systems, migrating towards their brain stems.” Both Freeman and Ransom began to convulse violently. “They’re going into neural shock! We need to perform neurosurgery on them right now!”
“Hey, what about me?” The young Bajoran yelped as Freeman and Ransom were rushed into the surgical suite.
“Don’t worry. Your condition is now stable,” Tendi reassured him. “The doctor will get to you right after she’s done with the captain and Commander Ransom.”
“Lieutenant Yuna to Sickbay,” The ships’ comm was heard once again. “Medical assistance to Cetacean Ops immediately.”
“Acknowledged. Medical is on the way,” T’Ana replied as she was helped into a surgical gown. “Tendi, get down there and provide whatever medical assistance is needed.”
“Me?” Tendi gulped. “Uh, shouldn’t you send someone with more experience like Nurse Westlake?”
“I need him here to assist with the surgeries,” T’Ana said. “Now move it!”
“Right!” Tendi quickly grabbed a medkit and ran out of Sickbay.
“Out of the way! Coming through! Medical emergency! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” Tendi shouted as she raced down the corridors of the Cerritos’ while avoiding knocking into passing crewmembers. “Whew, I knew all that anti-grav lift racing would come in handy someday!”
Tendi finally reached Cetacean Ops. “Okay, Medical is here!” She announced bursting through the doors. “What’s the emergency?”
“It is Specialist Paikea,” Lieutenant Yuna indicated her fellow cetacean slowly swimming next to her in the aquatic side of the operations center. “She just went into labor.”
“Already?” Tendi blinked at the pregnant dolphin crewperson in surprise. “I thought your last medical evaluation didn’t predict you giving birth for another few weeks.”
“Guess my progeny is impatient,” Paikea smiled as she gently surfaced for a breath. “Cetacean Ops is better equipped for allowing humanoids to operate in an aquatic environment than anywhere else on the ship. Would you mind donning the necessary gear and following me to my quarters?”
“Sure. No problem,” Tendi quickly climbed into a sleek diving suit and passed through the airlock in the transparent aluminum divide. “Good thing Starfleet makes all their medical equipment waterproof.”
“Please, this way,” Paikea gently led Tendi through a doorway adjacent to Cetacean Ops.
“Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!” An adult male dolphin greeted them in a proportionally-sized crew quarters three-quarters filled with water. He wore a plain civilian-style Taylor rig while swimming around clicking anxiously. “I am going to be a father! I am going to be a father!”
“This is my mate Kupe,” Paikea introduced. “He is very excited.”
“I can tell,” Tendi smiled taking out her tricorder. “Okay, baby monitoring is set. Mother’s biosigns are stable. How do you feel?”
“Fine. No pain at all…oh!” A sudden tremor ran the length of Paikea’s body. “I believe the baby is beginning to come out!”
“That’s it. You’re doing fine,” Tendi moved to get a better view. “Alright, here it comes. I can see the head!”
“Oh dear. That is not good,” Paikea surfaced for a breath. “Cetacean babies are usually born tail-first. If they are delivered head-first they may drown before the birthing process is complete.”
“What?!” Kupe began to fret and babble nervously. “Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!”
“Okay, don’t panic. I can handle this,” Tendi gulped thinking quickly. “Aha! Be right back!”
“Where are you going?” Kupe yelped as Tendi swam back into Cetacean Ops. “You can not leave my mate like this!”
“Stay calm and breathe deep,” Paikea counselled him gently. “The young medical officer knows what she is doing.”
“I’m back!” Tendi reappeared brandishing a large, portable oxygen supply. She surfaced and quickly fitted it with a breathing mask. “Okay, Paikea. Try to remain still.”
“Alright,” Paikea calmly hovered in the water.
Tendi dove and gently fitted the mask over the baby dolphin’s exposed blowhole just as it emerged before carefully turning on the air supply. “Alright! It works! Airway is clear of fluids and the baby is breathing normally.”
“Yay!” Kupe clicked happily. “Well done, Ensign!”
“Don’t celebrate just yet, sir,” Tendi warned checking her tricorder. “This baby still has a ways to go before being fully born.”
“As if I needed reminding,” Paikea quipped teasingly.
“Don’t worry. Just relax and take as long as you need,” Tendi smiled as she continued to monitor the birthing process. “I’ll stay right here with you the entire time. Well, at least until I need a new supply of oxygen…”
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A Shift in Sickbay
“Hello, Doctor!” Tendi chirped entering Sickbay. Only two biobeds were currently occupied by patients. “Ensign D’Vana Tendi, reporting for duty.”
“Tendi,” T’Ana grunted working in her office. “You know, you don’t have to say that every time you arrive for your shift.”
“Oh, I don’t mind,” Tendi smiled. “It’s my duty to display a degree of professionalism and show proper respect towards senior officers…”
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” T’Ana brusquely cut her off. “Start running an immunogenicity analysis on Batch Six-E of the collected tissue samples from yesterday.”
“Yes, sir!” Tendi beamed happily moving to a laboratory station. “Okay you little cell clusters. Let’s see what kind of fun tests I get to run on you today.” She began humming to herself.
“Oooh, is there a doctor in the house?” Jet lurched into Sickbay with his face all red and puffy. “My mucus membranes are working overtime.”
“They aren’t the only ones,” T’Ana growled working a padd. “I’ll see to you in a second. Right after I finish updating this electroencephalography scan.”
“Don’t worry, doctor. I’ll run a preliminary check on him,” Tendi quickly volunteered and approached Jet. “Wow, what happened to you?”
“Dunno,” Jet wheezed as Tendi gently led him to a biobed. “I was perfectly fine yesterday. Woke up this morning feeling all itchy and puffy.”
“Hmmm. That’s odd,” Tendi commented examining him. “Have you eaten or been exposed to anything new or unusual recently?”
“Well, I did go on a date with Ensign Ramga last night,” Jet thought for a moment.
“The Phylosian in Tactical?” Tendi inquired.
“Yep,” Jet nodded. “We went back to her place afterwards where we enjoyed spreading her petals and blooming her blossom if you get my drift.”
“Oooh! Way to go, Jet!” An unseen medical technician cheered.
“Aw, that’s nice,” Tendi commented casually while scanning him. “Wait, did she spray any of her spores or pollen on you?”
“Well, yeah,” Jet coughed as T’Ana joined them. “Among other things…”
“Aha, that’s it!” Tendi exclaimed showing T’Ana her tricorder. “Looks like he’s allergic to Phylosian pollen.”
“I agree,” T’Ana studied the readings and sniffed Jet in confirmation. “Your Defensive Denobulan impression is due to a severe sinus infection.”
“Huh, imagine that,” Jet rasped. “So, what’s the treatment, Doc? DNA therapy? Nasal surgery?”
“No, nothing that drastic,” T’Ana instructed Tendi to prepare a hypospray. “A few doses of antihistamines and numinol tetraminothen will have you back to normal. Just stay away from Phylosian pollen from now on.”
“Gee, guess that means I won’t be going out with Ramga again. Too bad. She’s such a nice person,” Jet sighed as Tendi hypoed him. The redness and swelling immediately began to fade. “Ahhh, that’s great! I feel better already. Thanks, Doc. D’Vana.”
“Happy to help,” Tendi beamed as Jet hopped off the biobed and exited Sickbay. “Ah, that was fun! My first independent Cerritos medical diagnosis.”
“Good job, Tendi,” T’Ana said absently. “Now get back to work.”
“Right,” Tendi nodded heading back towards the lab station.
“Hi there!” A Jefferies tube hatch popped open allowing Rutherford to stick his head into Sickbay. “Don’t mind me. Just stopping in for a visit.”
“Not again!” T’Ana snapped stepping out of the way. “How many times have I told you not to do that anymore, Ensign? Come in through the doors like a normal person!”
“Sorry,” Rutherford apologized. “I’ll try to do so in the future,”
“Hi, Rutherford!” Tendi greeted. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh, I was just in the area resynching live power couplings,” Rutherford said emerging from the tube. “One of them suffered a brief overload and my arm got kind of fried.”
“Oh my gosh!” Tendi gasped at Rutherford’s scorched and charred arm. “We’ve got to treat that right away!”
“Oh, there’s no hurry,” Rutherford assured her as Tendi hauled him onto a biobed. “I’m already ahead of schedule and I wouldn’t want to cut in line ahead of any other patients.”
“There aren’t any other patients ahead of you right now,” T’Ana growled as she and Tendi began to quickly treat Rutherford’s burns.
“Doesn’t it hurt?” Tendi winced at the burned skin.
“Na, the electrical discharge from the power overload zapped all the nerves in my arm rendering it completely numb,” Rutherford explained cheerfully. “The surge protectors in my implant protected it from getting fried. Oh, and they protected the rest of my brain too.”
“What’s left of it,” T’Ana muttered.
“I see,” Tendi handed T’Ana a dermal regenerator. “Glad you’re putting your recent Sickbay experience to good use.”
“Yep, I figure my nerves will start regaining their normal function any second now…AAAHHHHHH!” Rutherford yelped. “Oh man, that hurts! The pain! The pain! Yeeeooowww!”
“Oops! Sorry!” Tendi quickly gave him a hypo of anesthetic. “Better?”
“Much,” Rutherford sighed in relief. “Thanks.”
“You were darn lucky this time, Ensign,” T’Ana grunted as she finished healing Rutherford’s arm. “Most of your wounds were superficial. Another few milliamps and that power coupling would have cooked you like a badly replicated pot roast. Be more careful in the future.”
“Okey-dokey,” Rutherford nodded inspecting his burned sleeve. “Better go change my uniform before getting back to work.” He glanced at Tendi. “Wanna meet up for lunch later?”
“You bet,” Tendi grinned.
“Great. See ya!” Rutherford smiled heading back towards the Jefferies tube hatch.
“Use the doors!” T’Ana snapped at him. “And go easy on that arm!”
“Oh. Right,” Rutherford sheepishly closed the hatch before exiting Sickbay through said doors.
“Gee, I hope Rutherford will be okay,” Tendi fretted putting medical instruments away. “He really needs to take better care of himself. Last time he got hurt in the Jefferies tubes he waited until the end of his shift before getting all his cuts and blisters treated. Then he had to climb back in and clean up all the blood and puss he left all over the ship.”
“Accckkk! Help!” Lieutenant Levy ran into Sickbay with a panicked look on his face. “Somebody help me!”
“Oh great. What is it this time?” T’Ana growled irritably.
“Doc! Something weird is happening to me!” Levy shouted clutching his temples. “I’m hearing strange voices in my head and they’re speaking an unknown alien language!”
“Really?” Tendi blinked. “Oooo, how exciting!”
“They’re broadcasting messages directly into my brain!” Levy yelped looking paranoid. “They’re trying to drive me crazy!”
“You’re already crazy!” T’Ana snapped pushing him onto a biobed. “And you need to already have a brain in order for something to mess with it.”
“It’s a conspiracy I tell you!” Levy babbled as T’Ana began scanning him with a tricorder. “It could be a new form of telepathic attack or subliminal messages being conveyed via an implanted neural transponder!”
“Or a simple case of tinnitus,” T’Ana grunted diagnosing the problem. “Just like it was the last three times this month!”
“THAT’S JUST WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK!” Levy yelled. “IT’S A CONSPIRACY I TELL YOU! TINNITUS IS A MEDICAL HOAX! A SECRET ORGANIZATION INSIDE STARFLEET IS USING IT TO COVER UP THE TRUTH! BEWARE! BEWARE!”
“Be quiet and hold still so I can treat you!” T’Ana snapped and signaled Tendi as she ran a sonic modulator over Levy’s ear. “Call Security and have them escort this nut out of my Sickbay.”
“Uh, right,” Tendi blinked doing so.
“YOU CAN’T STOP ME! THE TRUTH MUST BE TOLD!” Levy howled as a security team quickly arrived and dragged him out the doors. “SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES ARE AN INSIDE JOB! LITERALLY!”
“I swear, the only thing worse than paperwork is dealing with the lunatics I have to serve with,” T’Ana grumbled heading back to her office. “Now I have to update Levy’s medical profile to include paranoid delusions.”
“That’s one way to put it,” Tendi commented shaking her head. “Huh, a secret organization operating inside Starfleet. What are the chances of that?”
“Wow, what was all that about?” Boimler asked entering Sickbay. “Did Levy have another one of his crazy conspiracy attacks?”
“Sorry. Doctor-patient confidentiality prevents me from saying,” Tendi replied diplomatically. “So, what brings you here?”
“I’ve been feeling kinda funny lately,” Boimler said taking a seat on a biobed. “Dizziness, palpitations, sweaty palms, blurred vision. At first I thought Mariner had just put Garanian bolites in my bed again, but…”
“Well, do you look a little greener than usual,” Tendi smiled scanning him. “It looks on you…uh oh.”
“Uh oh?” Boimler gulped. “What’s ‘uh oh’?”
“Um, probably nothing,” Tendi laughed nervously. “Doctor T’Ana, can you come look at this?”
“Now what?” T’Ana grunted coming over. Tendi showed her the tricorder. “Oh great! How did that happen?”
“What?” Boimler asked anxiously. “How did what happen?”
“Looks like you somehow managed to contract Terrellian Death Syndrome, Ensign,” T’Ana informed him.
“WHAT?!” Boimler yelped. “AAAHHHHHH! HELP! NO! I’M GONNA DIE!”
“You’re not going to die!” T’Ana snapped. “Not unless you keep annoying the heck out of me!”
“But Terrelian Death Syndrome is fatal!” Boimler babbled hysterically. “It causes irreversible cellular degradation! I read about in the Starfleet Medical Database!”
“That’s Terrelian Death Syndrome,” T’Ana explained. “This is Terrellian Death Syndrome. It’s completely different.”
“It is?” Boimler blinked hopefully. “But they sound so similar.”
“Only to the auditory insensitive,” T’Ana muttered sending Tendi to the supply closet. “Terrellian Death Syndrome is much rarer than Terrelian Death Syndrome. And it is far more deadly…”
“AAAGGGHHHHHH! I KNEW IT!” Boimler cried. “HELP! I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!”
“Calm down! Let me finish!” T’Ana shouted. “Terrellian Death Syndrome is far more deadly when left untreated. Fortunately, the cure can be easily synthesized and we have a few already prepared doses in stock.”
“Oh,” Boimler blushed as Tendi shot him with a hypospray. “That’s pleasantly unexpected.”
“There. Your Terrellian Death Syndrome troubles are over,” T’Ana waved him off heading back to her office. “Unlike me. I’m the one who now has to implement a ship-wide health and biofilter check to make sure there aren’t any other cases of it aboard the Cerritos.”
“Right. Thanks,” Boimler sighed heading for the doors. “See you later, Tendi.”
“Bye Boimler,” Tendi waved. “Feel free to come by again soon!”
“Ohhhh,” A young, heavily wounded Bajoran painfully limped into Sickbay. He had a black eye, torn uniform, twisted arm, obviously broken leg and was bleeding profusely from multiple lacerations. “Help me…”
“Oh my gosh!” Tendi gasped. “Doctor T’Ana, you’re needed out here, stat!”
“What is it?” T’Ana took one look at the young man and quickly sprang into action. “Get him on a biobed! Nurse Westlake, prep the surgical suite!”
“Yes, doctor!” Westlake swiftly moved to do so.
“I’m reading multiple contusions, three broken ribs, internal bleeding,” T’Ana ran a tricorder over the young man. “Ten cc’s of coranalin!”
“Yes, doctor,” Tendi quickly prepped and administered the hypo into the Bajoran’s neck. “What happened to you? Are we under attack? Have aliens boarded the ship? Did Shaxs run you through one of his intense training programs?”
“No. Food fight,” The young Bajoran moaned. “They’re serving real carnitas in the Mess Hall with homemade guacamole, but there wasn’t enough pico de gallo to go around…”
“WHAT?!” Half the medical staff yelled. “LET ME AT IT!”
“You can all stuff your faces later!” T’Ana snapped. “Right after you finish patching this idiot up. Just make sure you save some carnitas meat for me!”
“Yes, doctor!” The entire medical staff began working at record speed.
“Bridge to Sickbay! Medical emergency!” Lieutenant Shaxs’ voice boomed over the comm. “Prepare to receive casualties!”
“Understood. Standing by,” T’Ana tapped her combadge. “Everyone, drop what you’re doing, stabilize your patients and get ready to act!”
“Yes, doctor,” Tendi braced herself as the prone forms of Captain Freeman and Commander Ransom materialized inside Sickbay via transporter.
“What happened?” T’Ana immediately began scanning them with a tricorder.
“Preliminary administrative meeting gone wrong,” Lieutenant Commander Billups reported having transported in as well. “One minute we were discussing possible engineering updates with the local Rigellian council. The next thing I knew Captain Freeman and Commander Ransom had been knocked to the floor with bite marks on their necks.”
“The Rigellians attacked the captain and first officer?” Tendi gasped in shock.
“No, their pet Berengarian dragon-snake did,” Billups explained. “One of the Rigellian officials brought it along to the meeting. He said the dragon-snake was just being friendly. Its bites were signs of affection.”
“More like infection,” T’Ana studied her tricorder. “I’m reading concentrated levels of a highly complex neurotoxin in both their wounds. It’s attacking their nervous systems, migrating towards their brain stems.” Both Freeman and Ransom began to convulse violently. “They’re going into neural shock! We need to perform neurosurgery on them right now!”
“Hey, what about me?” The young Bajoran yelped as Freeman and Ransom were rushed into the surgical suite.
“Don’t worry. Your condition is now stable,” Tendi reassured him. “The doctor will get to you right after she’s done with the captain and Commander Ransom.”
“Lieutenant Yuna to Sickbay,” The ships’ comm was heard once again. “Medical assistance to Cetacean Ops immediately.”
“Acknowledged. Medical is on the way,” T’Ana replied as she was helped into a surgical gown. “Tendi, get down there and provide whatever medical assistance is needed.”
“Me?” Tendi gulped. “Uh, shouldn’t you send someone with more experience like Nurse Westlake?”
“I need him here to assist with the surgeries,” T’Ana said. “Now move it!”
“Right!” Tendi quickly grabbed a medkit and ran out of Sickbay.
“Out of the way! Coming through! Medical emergency! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” Tendi shouted as she raced down the corridors of the Cerritos’ while avoiding knocking into passing crewmembers. “Whew, I knew all that anti-grav lift racing would come in handy someday!”
Tendi finally reached Cetacean Ops. “Okay, Medical is here!” She announced bursting through the doors. “What’s the emergency?”
“It is Specialist Paikea,” Lieutenant Yuna indicated her fellow cetacean slowly swimming next to her in the aquatic side of the operations center. “She just went into labor.”
“Already?” Tendi blinked at the pregnant dolphin crewperson in surprise. “I thought your last medical evaluation didn’t predict you giving birth for another few weeks.”
“Guess my progeny is impatient,” Paikea smiled as she gently surfaced for a breath. “Cetacean Ops is better equipped for allowing humanoids to operate in an aquatic environment than anywhere else on the ship. Would you mind donning the necessary gear and following me to my quarters?”
“Sure. No problem,” Tendi quickly climbed into a sleek diving suit and passed through the airlock in the transparent aluminum divide. “Good thing Starfleet makes all their medical equipment waterproof.”
“Please, this way,” Paikea gently led Tendi through a doorway adjacent to Cetacean Ops.
“Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!” An adult male dolphin greeted them in a proportionally-sized crew quarters three-quarters filled with water. He wore a plain civilian-style Taylor rig while swimming around clicking anxiously. “I am going to be a father! I am going to be a father!”
“This is my mate Kupe,” Paikea introduced. “He is very excited.”
“I can tell,” Tendi smiled taking out her tricorder. “Okay, baby monitoring is set. Mother’s biosigns are stable. How do you feel?”
“Fine. No pain at all…oh!” A sudden tremor ran the length of Paikea’s body. “I believe the baby is beginning to come out!”
“That’s it. You’re doing fine,” Tendi moved to get a better view. “Alright, here it comes. I can see the head!”
“Oh dear. That is not good,” Paikea surfaced for a breath. “Cetacean babies are usually born tail-first. If they are delivered head-first they may drown before the birthing process is complete.”
“What?!” Kupe began to fret and babble nervously. “Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!”
“Okay, don’t panic. I can handle this,” Tendi gulped thinking quickly. “Aha! Be right back!”
“Where are you going?” Kupe yelped as Tendi swam back into Cetacean Ops. “You can not leave my mate like this!”
“Stay calm and breathe deep,” Paikea counselled him gently. “The young medical officer knows what she is doing.”
“I’m back!” Tendi reappeared brandishing a large, portable oxygen supply. She surfaced and quickly fitted it with a breathing mask. “Okay, Paikea. Try to remain still.”
“Alright,” Paikea calmly hovered in the water.
Tendi dove and gently fitted the mask over the baby dolphin’s exposed blowhole just as it emerged before carefully turning on the air supply. “Alright! It works! Airway is clear of fluids and the baby is breathing normally.”
“Yay!” Kupe clicked happily. “Well done, Ensign!”
“Don’t celebrate just yet, sir,” Tendi warned checking her tricorder. “This baby still has a ways to go before being fully born.”
“As if I needed reminding,” Paikea quipped teasingly.
“Don’t worry. Just relax and take as long as you need,” Tendi smiled as she continued to monitor the birthing process. “I’ll stay right here with you the entire time. Well, at least until I need a new supply of oxygen…”
