"Spock does Billy Joel"

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Jayson1, May 24, 2018.

  1. Jayson1

    Jayson1 Vice Admiral Admiral

    Mar 21, 2017
    Spock looked around the Romulan cave hideout and noticed how tense and depressed the Romulans seemed to be. It was if all the air had been let out of a balloon and he was worried because it had been months since Picard had left and Pardek was exposed and their glimmer of quick hope of Unification coming fast was dashed. He knew from studying history that these kinds of movements can die without hope and to get them back on track they were going to need some kind of catharsis to get over what had happened. So he did the only logical thing a Vulcan can do and that is to jam with them. It worked with his harp playing with the space hippies years ago on the Enterprise and the break dance session he had to help Gillian Taylor feel more comfortable in the 23rd century years later at Starfleet Headquarters or the time he did the famous Turkey Dance to help the BIrdmanians feel welcome on their homeworld when they joined the Federation. Spock pondered for 3 minutes and 43 seconds and then the answer came to him. It had to be Biilly Joel. He already practiced his version of "Piano Man" for months before even coming to Romulus on the possibility something like this woyld happen. "I need a Earth PIano, D'Tan" he stated. Spock knew he was resourceful and would provide and sure enough he did within 5 hours.

    Spock sat down on the PIano and cracked his knuckles and looked at the perplexed crown and began to play and sing:

    It's nine o'clock on a Stardate
    The Romulan crowd shuffles in
    There's a old Sub-Commander sitting next to me
    Makin' love to his Romulan Ale and gin

    He says,"Son can you give me a mind meld
    I'm not really sure how it goes
    But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew them complete
    When I wore a young Centurians clothes."

    La la la,di da da
    La la,di da da da dum

    Sing us a song, you're the Vulcan man
    Sing us a song tonight
    Well,we're all in the mood for a mind meld
    And you got us feelin' alright

    Now Johnek at the bar is a friend of mine
    He gets me my pomek soup for free
    And he's quick with a joke or a Vulcan hand salute
    But there's someplace that he'd rather be
    He says,"Vulcan Man,I believe this is killing me."
    As the smile ran away from his face
    "Well I'm sure that I could be in Starfleet
    If I could just get out of this place"

    Oh,la la la,di da da
    La la,di da da da dum

    Now Paulek is a Reman novelist
    Who never had time for a wife
    And he's talkin' with Devius,who still lives on Remus
    And probably will be for life

    And the servants are practicing politics
    As the Senators slowly get stoned
    Yes,they're sharing a ale they call loneliness
    But it's better than being alone

    Sing us a song you're the Vulcan man
    Sing us a song tonight
    Well we're all in the mood for a mind meld
    And you got us feeling alright

    It's a pretty good crowd for a Stardate
    And our second in command gives me a Jolan Tru
    'Cause he knows that it's me they've been comin' to see
    To help forget Unification is long past due
    And the piano,it sounds like a carnival
    And the microphone smells like a Ale
    And they sit at the bar and put latinum in my jar
    And say, "Vulcan man, what are you doin' here?"

    Oh,la la la,di da da
    La la,di da da da dum,

    Sing us a song you're the Vulcan man
    Sing us a song tonight
    Well we're all in the mood for a mind meld
    And you got us feeling alright

    Spock looked around and noticed the mood had improved. It was something to work with. He was starting to feel tired and knew he needed to rest. Tomorrow he would sing them "Pressure" and go from there.. He didn't like gut instincts but he had come to trust them more than he did in his youth and he had a good feeling that everything was going to work out for the Romulan people.

    Last edited: May 24, 2018
    Spot261 likes this.
  2. Dashiell Mirai

    Dashiell Mirai Lieutenant Red Shirt

    Nov 20, 2017
    I am confusion
  3. Marynator

    Marynator Vice Princess Premium Member

    Mar 12, 2018
    United States
    I'm really reading your double-entendres here, right from your title. I feel you've got a very interesting concept, Spock is bringing peace to reunify his people and Romulus through an inter-stellar homosexual orgy. I'm sorry but I'm totally seeing it, I feel you picked a perfect song, and your changes just all seem to fit, I am pretty sure like "mind meld" totally has a double meaning here. You have no female characters at all mentioned, which totally fits your theme? I'm seeing suggestive double meaning everywhere, I can't be the only one? I don't normally go there, so I feel you've been very effective if you're creating this image in my mind, and I am totally seeing this vision of love and peace.
  4. Spot261

    Spot261 Vice Admiral Admiral

    Aug 16, 2013
    @Jayson I think you've found your groove!
  5. Abi Smith

    Abi Smith Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

    Jun 27, 2018
    Presumably 'Pressure' is about Vulcan nerve pinches.