I've been re-watching ENT and am currently a few episodes into the second season. I remembered being a little put off by T'Pol when the show was originally airing, but I'm actually finding her a very effective character very well payed by Blalock. There's a lot more depth and nuance to her performance than I recalled; her inner struggles and insecurities are conveyed as clearly and convincingly as her strengths, if not moreso. I'm loving the progression of how she is initially disdainful and standoffish toward Archer and the other human characters, as they are toward her, but gradually she becomes more at home as they all start to trust and rely on each other. By the time we get to that scene where she sticks up for them all in front of the Vulcans who want to cancel their mission at the conclusion of the "Shockwave" 2-parter, and then Archer goes to thank her afterwards, there is a wonderful sense of a strong bond of loyalty, respect, and even affection between them.
It's equally possible to interpret Spock's displays of physical intimacy toward Uhura in the rebooted films the same way you interpret Sarek's toward Amanda. Uhura's really the one who initiates the examples we do see, IIRC.
I must admit that Spock and Uhura's relationship does rub me the wrong way a bit, or at least did at first. But for me the problem was never Spock having romance in his life per se. I have no objection to that. What bothered me was him having a romantic relationship with someone who was introduced as his student and then subsequently became his junior officer aboard the Enterprise.
In "Fusion" (ENT) it seems to be suggested that at that point they did generally only mate during pon farr when driven to, given Kov's fascination with the prospect of humans mating year-round, but he also says later that they've "been developing methods to accelerate the mating cycle," which I interpreted to mean some sort of Vulcan version of Viagra. (There could also be natural variation among individuals, too, of course. Not every human has identical sex drive.)
Quite.
From "Yesteryear" (TAS):
SPOCK: Vulcans do not lack emotion. It is only that ours is controlled. Logic offers a serenity humans seldom experience in full. We have emotions but we deal with them and do not let them control us.
From "Sarek" (TNG):
TROI: Well, Vulcans have the same basic emotions we do. They've just learned to repress them.
[...]
SAREK: Vulcan emotions are extremely intense. We have learned to suppress them. No human would be able to control them. They would overwhelm you.
From "Riddles" (VGR):
NEELIX: Well, you won't call it fun. You'll call it deriving satisfaction. But it's basically the same thing. You'll still experience emotions.
TUVOK: But I won't express them.
From "Repression" (VGR):
TEERO: [to Tuvok] I'm a student of the mind. Yours is remarkable. Disciplined, orderly. On the surface, that is. Beneath...boiling emotions, repressed violence.
From "Impulse" (ENT):
HAWKINS: May I ask you a question? How is it possible that this crew could turn so violent, when Vulcans aren't supposed to have emotions?
T'POL: A common misconception. We have emotions. We simply keep them suppressed, under control.
From "Twilight" (ENT):
PHLOX: Vulcans experience the same emotions as any other species. They're simply better at hiding them.
From Star Trek (2009):
SAREK: Emotions run deep within our race. In many ways, more deeply than in humans. Logic offers a serenity humans seldom experience. The control of feelings, so that they do not control you.
(There may be still other examples, but I thought these more than sufficient.)