Why didn't Geordi trust Picard in Destiny? You're cutting him slack that you're not granting to Miranda. That's a double standard.
And it remains a false premise. You can trust and respect someone and still have a profound disagreement with them. You've acknowledged that was the case with Geordi. So you're contradicting yourself by treating it as an impossibility when talking about Miranda.
Nechayev and Jellico were her commanding officers too. I say again, the issue of trust and loyalty is not exclusively about Jean-Luc Picard. Haven't you ever been torn between two choices that both required going against someone you respected or cared for? Haven't you ever been in a situation where neither alternative was desirable but you were forced to choose one or the other of the two bad options you had?
As for why she didn't try to bridge the divide -- why pin it exclusively on her? Why didn't Nechayev or Picard try harder to bridge the divide? Why didn't Worf bring his years of diplomatic experience to bear on finding a way to bridge the divide? In Greater Than the Sum, when Nechayev and Picard met a few months later, they both admitted that they'd been too confrontational, too unwilling to bend or compromise or trust one another. Nobody in that situation behaved in a particularly admirable manner. If Picard and the admirals hadn't been so intractable, Miranda would've never been put into that position in the first place. It was unfair of them to place that burden on her. She was an overworked, stressed-out junior officer put in a terrible position by the bad judgment of her superiors in the middle of a terrifying and disastrous situation. Would your judgment have been any better in such circumstances?
Nobody's saying Miranda's choice was right or perfect. Only that she's not an incompetent or hateful person just because she was forced into a situation that gave her no good options.
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