Good movie reviews aren't like that. Roger Ebert probably wouldn't have a Pulitzer Prize if movie criticism were completely worthless. A good film review is more like a book report than a verdict on whether, or not, to see it. A good movie review is an analysis of the film. It analyzes the film's place within the context of film history, within the context of its genre, within the context of its expected audience, etc. Good movie criticism serves as literature in its own right.Movie reviews are disease and danger wrapped in smugness and elitism.
It's not so much smugness and elitism, but an articulation of the way a film stimulates the writer intellectually and emotionally.
I have to admit I love reading a well-written and thoughtful movie review. And, a consensus or consistent theme among reviews by serious reviewers of a film probably should not be ignored. Like the critiques of the plot in ST09. Luckily, another consensus so far seems to be the movie overcomes this fault and is still very good and entertaining.