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Should I have said something?

farmkid

Commodore
Commodore
This has been on my mind since it happened yesterday and I was wondering what others thought about it. So I was with my wife and kids at an event yesterday. As I'm walking around I walk past a lady sitting down talking to some other people. She is wearing a top that exposed her shoulders and upper back, and right there on her back was a rather large mole. It looked to me like it could be cancerous because of its size, pigmentation and shape. Now, I'm not a doctor, (well, I guess I am, but a Ph.D. not a M.D., and certainly not a dermatologist or oncologist) but I do know something about melanoma. I spent years studying pigment cells; I've been to conferences where melanoma and pigment cell biology was the main topic, and perhaps most important of all, I'm at risk for melanoma myself so I've learned what to look for. I don't know whether this woman's mole was melanoma or not, but it looked suspicious to me.

I wondered at the time if I should say something to her, but I didn't. Since then, I've wondered if I should have just somewhere found the courage to approach this woman I had never seen before and suggest she go see a doctor about the mole on her back because it just might be cancerous. Oh, and by the way, if it is cancerous, it's a rather nasty kind of cancer with a very low survival rate, not to scare you or anything. Yeah, that would have been a rather awkward and probably unpleasant conversation, but it might have saved her life if it is melanoma.

So, what do you think? Should I have said something to her? Would you have said something?
 
I understand your worry. But hopefully if it is indeed a large and unusual-looking mole, she'll get it looked at herself? I mean, I have no medical background, I personally know nothing about pigment cells and I couldn't tell you anything about actual diseases and afflictions, :lol:, but I was under the assumption that it's a basic health thing- if you have an odd, irregular, blotchy, over-sized mole, you get it looked at. Just to be safe. Make a quick appointment for a few weeks down the line, and have the GP give it a look. See what he or she thinks. So it should be okay either way, right?
 
I understand your worry. But hopefully if it is indeed a large and unusual-looking mole, she'll get it looked at herself?

If it's on the woman's back, she might not come across it in her everyday life.

I honestly don't know if I would have said anything. I'd like to think I'd have the guts to do it. The worst that can happen is she tells you to get lost. But at least she'd be aware of the danger.
 
I understand your worry. But hopefully if it is indeed a large and unusual-looking mole, she'll get it looked at herself? I mean, I have no medical background, I personally know nothing about pigment cells and I couldn't tell you anything about actual diseases and afflictions, :lol:, but I was under the assumption that it's a basic health thing- if you have an odd, irregular, blotchy, over-sized mole, you get it looked at. Just to be safe. Make a quick appointment for a few weeks down the line, and have the GP give it a look. See what he or she thinks. So it should be okay either way, right?
I hope you're right. But, as I mentioned, the mole is on her back where she can't see it, so she would have to depend on someone else to see it and tell her it's there. I have no idea if she sees a doctor regularly, or if her family and acquaintances are familiar with the signs to look for.
 
If a stranger came up to me and said, “Do you know about that funny-looking thing on your arm? I think it might be cancerous. Uh, not that I'm a doctor or anything”, I'd think he was being rude and presumptuous.

I'd just mind my own business. Someone will notice that mole pretty soon. If not the woman herself, then a family member, friend, acquaintance or co-worker.
 
No. She might have slapped you....

I wouldn't come up to a stranger, even if I was right about the mole I saw. Chances are someone she knows noticed it and told her about it if it was as big as you described.
 
Bluntly, her problem. Her doctor or nearest and dearest should tell her, not some random, not matter how well-intentioned.

I know exactly where you're coming from, but let it go. It wouldn't have worked out.
 
If you were a M.D. and had a professional opinion that it should be checked out, I'd recommend giving her your card and mentioning it. The card wouldn't be so much so that she'd come to see you necessarily, but more to establish your credentials.

But, because you're not an M.D. or a family member or friend, no, leave it alone.

Mr Awe
 
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