Sexy or Creepy?

[Mr. Laser Beam]

What's the big deal? Acting is acting, after all. There's thousands of different character archetypes to play. A good enough actor can play any role, regardless of orientation.

And besides, I'm sure there are as many "plain, down to earth" gay roles as there are straight ones.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

^How is it different from an actor playing a murderer, or a doctor, or a terrorist, or anyone else who is different to them? Not all gay men have a big "I'm Gay" sign on them, nor do all straight men indulge in only machismo pursuits. I've known effeminate straight men and macho gays. If a character is 3 dimensional and well-acted then that character's sexuality is either incidental or only an aspect of that character, I don't see how playing against sexual orientation should be especially difficult or surprising for an actor.

I guess it depends on the personality of the actor, too. I look at Zachary Quinto, who has played Spock and Sylar on the big and small screen, respectively, but those aren't exactly macho or "alpha male" roles, like Barney on HIMYM. But on American Horror Story, Quinto plays a flamin' gay ghost Chad, who's probably closer to his personality. The same can probably be said about Sir Ian McKellen who has played Magneto and Gandalf. I should've been more specific. If it's a plain, down-to-earth straight guy role, any actor can do that, but for the playboy or macho type, I can't help wondering if the gay actor has to put in more effort into their acting.

Jeez, when you put it that way, it sounds even worse, as if there is a certain way to "act gay" or "act straight" that comes more easily if you are of the orientation you're portraying.

Does everyone's personality revolve around their sexual preferences? I sure hope not.

 

[ares93]

The thing most people don't get that the average gay bloke doesn't look like or act like the gay bloke in your favorite show. They look like the random bloke in front of you at the ATM, or the bloke who walks past you at the supermarket. The kind of people you don't notice because you're too busy with your own shite.

One of me friends is gay, and to tell you lot the truth, i didn't know until he told me about three or four months after we met for the first time. And we'd been working side by side since he started. Never would've guessed.

 

[Gryffindorian]

The thing most people don't get that the average gay bloke doesn't look like or act like the gay bloke in your favorite show. They look like the random bloke in front of you at the ATM, or the bloke who walks past you at the supermarket. The kind of people you don't notice because you're too busy with your own shite.

Not in my area, as in the SF Bay Area. Well, I don't mean to stereotype, but a lot of gay guys I've met or seen are flamin' and just flaunting it. Like my co-worker buddy, Dick. The uber-masculine types, nah, we don't get too many of those around here.

 

[doubleohfive]

^How is it different from an actor playing a murderer, or a doctor, or a terrorist, or anyone else who is different to them? Not all gay men have a big "I'm Gay" sign on them, nor do all straight men indulge in only machismo pursuits. I've known effeminate straight men and macho gays. If a character is 3 dimensional and well-acted then that character's sexuality is either incidental or only an aspect of that character, I don't see how playing against sexual orientation should be especially difficult or surprising for an actor.

I guess it depends on the personality of the actor, too. I look at Zachary Quinto, who has played Spock and Sylar on the big and small screen, respectively, but those aren't exactly macho or "alpha male" roles, like Barney on HIMYM. But on American Horror Story, Quinto plays a flamin' gay ghost Chad, who's probably closer to his personality. The same can probably be said about Sir Ian McKellen who has played Magneto and Gandalf. I should've been more specific. If it's a plain, down-to-earth straight guy role, any actor can do that, but for the playboy or macho type, I can't help wondering if the gay actor has to put in more effort into their acting.

Jeez, when you put it that way, it sounds even worse, as if there is a certain way to "act gay" or "act straight" that comes more easily if you are of the orientation you're portraying.

Does everyone's personality revolve around their sexual preferences? I sure hope not.

More importantly: If they did, would it be sexy or creepy?

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I guess it depends on the personality of the actor, too. I look at Zachary Quinto, who has played Spock and Sylar on the big and small screen, respectively, but those aren't exactly macho or "alpha male" roles, like Barney on HIMYM. But on American Horror Story, Quinto plays a flamin' gay ghost Chad, who's probably closer to his personality. The same can probably be said about Sir Ian McKellen who has played Magneto and Gandalf. I should've been more specific. If it's a plain, down-to-earth straight guy role, any actor can do that, but for the playboy or macho type, I can't help wondering if the gay actor has to put in more effort into their acting.

Jeez, when you put it that way, it sounds even worse, as if there is a certain way to "act gay" or "act straight" that comes more easily if you are of the orientation you're portraying.

Does everyone's personality revolve around their sexual preferences? I sure hope not.

More importantly: If they did, would it be sexy or creepy?

If they're hitting on me, it's always sexy.

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

But do they think it's creepy?

 

[doubleohfive]

Jeez, when you put it that way, it sounds even worse, as if there is a certain way to "act gay" or "act straight" that comes more easily if you are of the orientation you're portraying.

Does everyone's personality revolve around their sexual preferences? I sure hope not.

More importantly: If they did, would it be sexy or creepy?

If they're hitting on me, it's always sexy.

Shameless, you've got some willing, fresh meat!

 

[ares93]

^ Here we go again...

 

[VulcanJedi]

^Not pointless. At least not for me. I think it's interesting to hear what others think and it's a fun story to share either way. That's not pointless. If you think it's pointless, why bother joining in?

Hmmm...here I think I may have come across unclearly--I'm certainly not vulnerable. I was never out of control of the situation...like I said, I could have said no to the bijou bijou, I could have stopped the kiss, I could have given him a piece of my mind had I felt so inclined. At that moment, though, I didn't. I was surprised, not overtaken.

The confliction I think isn't a sign of vulnerability. It's a sign of contemplation and strength.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but you were vulnerable, far more than you realize. The fact that he kissed you without your consent proves it beyond a shadow of a doubt.

I completely disagree. And as I'm the one whose vulnerability is in question, I'm the most qualified to make that statement. Perhaps the subtleties of such an interaction simply cannot be appropriately conveyed over the internet, or perhaps you've just never had the experience of a sort of uncertain flirtation. Or perhaps it's a gender thing. But saying that I'm vulnerable because I let someone steal a kiss is a bit insulting.
I let a stranger steal a kiss...this means that I consciously put myself in a situation where he could do so. Though it came as a surprise, and I'm still ambivalent about what to think of him, there is a difference between being taken advantage of and consciously (and safely, again, think of the time and place where this occurred) putting oneself in the position where a man can make moves on you.
If at any moment I'd felt vulnerable or out of control, I would've ended it. Believe me, I've lived in big cities all my life, and on my own in NYC since I was a teenager...I know how to take care of myself when it comes to unsavory men on the streets.

You found him attractive. That's probably all that matters. Life isn't fair. The only thing creepy is that we've been led to believe something else; that there are rules to all this romance game stuff. All is fair in love and war.