Remembering people

[Miss Chicken]

Do you find it harder to remember someone's face or to remember their name?

I often have trouble with face recognition. One day a neighbour I only spoke to once in a while said "Hello" to me in the street and I didn't recognised him. People who I recognise in a certain setting (i.e. at work, or a friend of a friend) I don't recognise when they are in a different setting (such as in the street).

Names I seem to have less problems with. I tend to remember someone's name once I am introduced though sometimes I might get the name wrong (such as remembering one lady's name as Iris instead of Irene).

 

[Goliath]

Definitely someone's name. I'm terrible with names.

 

[RoJoHen]

I know I get weirded out whenever I see co-workers outside of work. I get so used to see these people in their uniforms that I always have to do a double-take when I see them in street clothes.

That said, I'm really good with face recognition. I remember people that I've never even formally met. If it's some random guy I saw at the gym one time, I will recognize him months later if I happen to see him at the grocery store.

 

[ManOnTheWave]

I am horrible with names. And if I see someone out of context, I probably won't recognize them.

 

[Mary Ann]

I'm bad with both, but worse with faces. It's pretty embarrassing when I come across one of our clients outside work and it takes me a while to work out who they are. I recognise the children much faster than their parents.

 

[RevDMV]

I'm a visual person, faces, streets, landmarks, whatever...

Names, forget it. I use whatever internal techniques I can to get through. But, change the road, haven't seen someone in a long time, and there it goes...

 

[Shaytan]

Names and usually only 1st names.

 

[Zulu Romeo]

Sometimes if a person I meet and talk to for the first time has a certain impression on me personality-wise, my mind creates this image based on the sort of archetype of person I imagined them to be based on my first brief meeting of them - and that said archetype also, for me has a certain characteristic facial appearance in my mind's eye. It's not until I see them again for a second or third time that I feel that they look different to how I imagined them. [You have this problem with music too, I see - someone]

But that's the only real thing I have regarding faces. Names are a bit more of a problem. However, I have found that the problem is often putting face to name, or name to face, but never a problem forgetting a name AND a face for any given person.

 

[propita]

When I was introduced to a student procter at my school's law library, I asked her to not be offended if I did not remember her name the next time we met, as I was bad at names and faces.

She said that I had said that the last FIVE TIMES we met.

Her name is Christa.

All these pretty, thin, young white girls with long straight hair look amazingly similar. "Blond girl" or "dark-haired girl."

 

[Holdfast]

Frankly I'm very poor with both.

It comes down to the general level of attention I pay to other people I randomly encounter, which is pretty damn low. Unless I make a special effort to remember their face or name (ie they're someone I think it's worth trying to remember), I can guarantee I won't recognise them next time and even if I do, I'll forget their name. You'll be amazed at the sheer number of different "covers" I've developed to socially disguise both these facts.

If I do think it's worth trying to remember them, there are various little memory tricks I use, but since I'm naturally lazy, I only use these techiniques when I feel it's worth it.

 

[Rii]

I'm worse with names than faces, and positively horrific when it comes to dates. The idiosyncrasies of human attention and memory are fascinating to explore. For example:

[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqwmnzhgB80[/yt]

 

[Holdfast]

Well, it all does come down to attention, as I mentioned in my post above. Most of the time, we don't really care about what's going on around us. Why should we? It's just irrelevant information, so we don't bother to notice it.

 

[Marten]

I'm good at actual people, mostly. People in books and movies, I never remember names of. I sort them by attributes, instead.

 

[Owain Taggart]

I usually need to see a face with the name, otherwise I have trouble remembering who they are and I often don't make the connection.

 

[iguana_tonante]

It comes down to the general level of attention I pay to other people I randomly encounter, which is pretty damn low.

This. I just don't care about people. Not enough to remember them, at any rate. I just get the feeling "I've met this person before", and then...

You'll be amazed at the sheer number of different "covers" I've developed to socially disguise both these facts.

This. I had entire conversations, entire evenings chatting with people I had no idea who they were, or where I met them the first time. That's great fun, tho.

On the other hand, people always remember me. I don't know if it's my striking features or my amazing personality (), but people recognize me years after a single encounter. I don't know if I should feel flattered, or worried.

 

[Smiley]

I just had an encounter this weekend with someone I knew pretty well in high school, and I did not recognize them. It was not until an hour later that I pieced together who they were. Like iguana, this problem is made worse by the fact that I am a distinctive type of person.

How do people improve their facial recall and name matching ability? Obviously, paying better attention during interaction helps, but what sort of mental tricks do you use to remember people? Also, is it better to just admit that the name is not coming to you, no matter how embarrassing it might be?

 

[Holdfast]

This. I had entire conversations, entire evenings chatting with people I had no idea who they were, or where I met them the first time. That's great fun, tho.

Yeah, been there, done that.

How do people improve their facial recall and name matching ability? Obviously, paying better attention during interaction helps, but what sort of mental tricks do you use to remember people?

Since I mentioned mental tricks earlier, I guess I should answer. The underlying idea is to actively memorise their face and name when you first meet them, by actually looking at them and using repetition & rehearsal to ingrain the memory. So look properly at their face, and make note of things that make them different/unique, as best you can. Then, when they tell you their name, make sure you use it several times in that initial conversation while looking at them. It's all about cementing the name, face and link between them in your memory. It's not perfect, but it helps.

As I said, it actually takes some effort to do this, so I can't say I use these techniques at all often. I guess it would become easier with more practice, but I can't be bothered to do it. Easier to just wing it when I re-encounter them...

 

[RJDiogenes]

^^ Eh, I just use a digital camera and a notebook.

I can be pretty absent minded, but I'm definitely worse with faces than names. I like to think I'd notice a different person popping up from behind a counter, but I wonder....

 

[nevermore]

I'm terrible at remembering, um, everything. Names worst of all, as they're basically meaningless signifiers. When I introduce myself to people, it always comes with a default "I won't remember your name, don't take it personally" disclaimer.

Faces I'm better with, but only to the "fuck, where do I know that guy from?" level.

 

[Holdfast]

^^ Eh, I just use a digital camera and a notebook.

I'd have thought you'd have learnt not to do this after they served you all those restraining orders.

When I introduce myself to people, it always comes with a default "I won't remember your name, don't take it personally" disclaimer.

Yeah, I'm not so sure this is a good idea. I've stopped doing it.

On one level, it's "I'm going to be self-deprecatorily polite and warn you about my amusing little foibles".

On another, it's "I don't give a fuck about you, and you know what? I'm going to tell you that, right from the off."

I now save this for when I really, really want them to know the latter.