Relationship Status

[RAMA]

Meaning he thought he was God and you didn’t?

(Yeah, it’s old. But still funny.)

Close. Apparently marrying me would be a sin and his option of marrying someone else and still seeing me was quickly rejected. If you try to make sense of it your head might explode.

May sound strange, and I don't know the cultural/religious context behind your situation, I can say I have more or less been there. I wasn't "spiritual" enough and did not display proper deference to the gender hierarchy in the religion I was raised in; therefore I was incapable of being "reasonable and rational" (lulz I know, coming from a religious fundamentalist.) He did display an interest in keeping me as a friend he could make out with (this again being a religious fundamentalist who was terrified of actual sex) until he found a more suitable mate. When I turned that offer down, well that was just proof of how stubborn, irrational, uncompliant and unsuitable I was!

I couldn't imagine dating anyone THAT religious. I'd blow my head off first.

RAMA

 

[Myasishchev]

You forgot some:
-domestic partnership
-civil union
-separated
-It's complicated


And I highly doubt any religious organization is against reproduction.

Some gnostics, iirc. Or at least it's a logical extrapolation from the premise.

 

[Mr Silver]

Single and If i'm being honest, loving it...heres why

*Not having to spend money on gifts and crap
*Not having to pay compliments
*Not having to make the bed
*Not having to worry about not calling or texting
*Not hiding the fact I check out other girls when i'm out

And numerous other reasons, sure, I miss the sex, but being able to give yourself a good old scratch and not worry about getting stick for being so disgusting from your partner is just bliss

If you cant do any of that on your own volition because you want to then your potential mate is better off without you.

RAMA

Rawwwwr! Claws out eh?

But the post wasn't meant to be taken seriously, I've had so much grief with Relationships thus far (and i'm only early 20's) that its good to have bit of fun from time to time

 

[gojiragirl]

Meaning he thought he was God and you didn’t?

(Yeah, it’s old. But still funny.)

Close. Apparently marrying me would be a sin and his option of marrying someone else and still seeing me was quickly rejected. If you try to make sense of it your head might explode.

May sound strange, and I don't know the cultural/religious context behind your situation, I can say I have more or less been there. I wasn't "spiritual" enough and did not display proper deference to the gender hierarchy in the religion I was raised in; therefore I was incapable of being "reasonable and rational" (lulz I know, coming from a religious fundamentalist.) He did display an interest in keeping me as a friend he could make out with (this again being a religious fundamentalist who was terrified of actual sex) until he found a more suitable mate. When I turned that offer down, well that was just proof of how stubborn, irrational, uncompliant and unsuitable I was!

Wow, that sounds almost exactly like what I'm going through now. It's amazing how they are so quick to pull the religious superiority card when they feel like it. It also becomes somewhat of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I'm not sure if I even went to be friends with him now. Does that work for anyone? Being friends with an Ex?

 

[RJDiogenes]

^^ Works for me. Of course, it's a long-distance ex.

 

[Squiggy]

^ So if Astra is your iHubby, does that mean your home is an...iPad?

 

[AdAstra]

Oh and I just realized that I am a big fat liar. I actually am married... to AdAstra. He is my BBS iHusband. We were married by Holdfast in an intimate online ceremony. Sorry babe. I completely forgot...

Someone must have spiked your punch at the reception.

Our wedding night was so mind-blowing he forgot.

 

[Myasishchev]

Single and If i'm being honest, loving it...heres why

*Not having to spend money on gifts and crap
*Not having to pay compliments
*Not having to make the bed
*Not having to worry about not calling or texting
*Not hiding the fact I check out other girls when i'm out

And numerous other reasons, sure, I miss the sex, but being able to give yourself a good old scratch and not worry about getting stick for being so disgusting from your partner is just bliss

If you cant do any of that on your own volition because you want to then your potential mate is better off without you.

RAMA

Rawwwwr! Claws out eh?

It's true: a timely made bed is a lover's most important duty. (Forget that "clitoris" nonsense.)

 

[Bears Discover Fire]

Close. Apparently marrying me would be a sin and his option of marrying someone else and still seeing me was quickly rejected. If you try to make sense of it your head might explode.

May sound strange, and I don't know the cultural/religious context behind your situation, I can say I have more or less been there. I wasn't "spiritual" enough and did not display proper deference to the gender hierarchy in the religion I was raised in; therefore I was incapable of being "reasonable and rational" (lulz I know, coming from a religious fundamentalist.) He did display an interest in keeping me as a friend he could make out with (this again being a religious fundamentalist who was terrified of actual sex) until he found a more suitable mate. When I turned that offer down, well that was just proof of how stubborn, irrational, uncompliant and unsuitable I was!

Wow, that sounds almost exactly like what I'm going through now. It's amazing how they are so quick to pull the religious superiority card when they feel like it. It also becomes somewhat of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I'm not sure if I even went to be friends with him now. Does that work for anyone? Being friends with an Ex?

If you don't want to be friends with the guy, don't. In fact, I highly recommend walking away and staying away unless there's a major, MAJOR change in his beliefs & behaviors, he demonstrates that change and a willingness to admit and apologize for his extremely poor behavior toward you. What he did is misogynist and disrespectful, to say the least, and no amount of religious wool should blind you to that fact.

If you want the cherry on top, the guy in my story promptly slept with the first girl after me who offered, knowing her for less than a week when he did so. That hurt quite a bit, and when he offered to reconcile after he realized she was just horny and uninterested beyond a brief fling, I refused to speak to him for several years.

Mind you, we were both very young in years and maturity. I was still trying to figure out how to separate myself from my insular, fundamentalist family religion without losing everything in the process, and he had taken up the faith in his teens as a substitute for the stability he was not getting at home. Eventually he grew up a bit, reexamined his beliefs and his reasons for holding them, and abandoned the religion. Once he did that, acknowledged his bad behavior and offered me a sincere mea culpa and plenty of space, we eventually returned to good terms with one another. But that 'eventually' was precarious and took years.

 

[gojiragirl]

^^^ He's apologized, but says that he's made up his mind about the relationship. I'm honestly not sure if I should or shouldn't be friends with him. Unfortunately we work in the same place and I see him and his friends (who are also friends with me) on a pretty regular basis.

 

[Amaris]

^^^ He's apologized, but says that he's made up his mind about the relationship. I'm honestly not sure if I should or shouldn't be friends with him. Unfortunately we work in the same place and I see him and his friends (who are also friends with me) on a pretty regular basis.

I wholeheartedly agree with Bears. You know, having dealt with friends and family who behave in similar ways, I promise you he is not likely to change. He'll "change" for a little while, then go back to his old ways. The only way he'll learn is if you show him that he screwed up so badly that his actions and behavior caused long term repercussions. Don't let him think for a moment there is a shortcut or quick fix back to your affections. Cut him off completely. Coldly if you must, or he'll just do it to someone else.

 

[Kathrin]

Single - not seeing anyone.... and I just won't mention how long it's been since I have dated anyone since that will depress me!

However, most people when they meet me have no idea I'm a Trekkie or Sci-Fi fan... I think my lack of companionship is because I'm also a tax nerd (doing my PhD in international tax law) ... you can imagine the fun conversations I have!

 

[MANT!]

^^^ He's apologized, but says that he's made up his mind about the relationship. I'm honestly not sure if I should or shouldn't be friends with him. Unfortunately we work in the same place and I see him and his friends (who are also friends with me) on a pretty regular basis.

Hard, very hard...keep what distance you can, be polite but reserved around him so that you can learn to be yourself again...

Saves a lot of grief over the long term...

At least he didn't wait until 25 years later to decide he didn't love you anymore...(mine is a long tale, but ends rather well actually) if you want to know the details you can PM me.

 

[ancientone51]

Widowed one year now.

Had 28 great years.

 

[Satyrquaze]

^^^ He's apologized, but says that he's made up his mind about the relationship. I'm honestly not sure if I should or shouldn't be friends with him. Unfortunately we work in the same place and I see him and his friends (who are also friends with me) on a pretty regular basis.

That sucks.

I was dating a coworker for several months and felt pretty serious about her, but we drifted apart and she immediately started dating another coworker...

It would probably be in your best interests to look for another job. Thats just my unsolicited advice.

 

[gojiragirl]

^^^Believe me, it has crossed my mind. But I've got a pretty awesome job and he's got to deal with me being there just as much as I have to deal with him.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

ancientone51 I am so sorry to hear that. It must be very hard to lose someone like that

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

I just won't mention how long it's been since I have dated anyone since that will depress me!

Don't feel bad...I haven't been in a relationship since the Atlanta Braves last won the World Series.

There, I said it.

I'm also a tax nerd (doing my PhD in international tax law) ...

I hope you're not just "auditing" the board.

 

[Gepard]

Don't feel bad...I haven't been in a relationship since the Atlanta Braves last won the World Series.

There, I said it.

And for those of us who don't live, breathe and sweat baseball, that would be...?

 

[Amaris]

Don't feel bad...I haven't been in a relationship since the Atlanta Braves last won the World Series.

There, I said it.

And for those of us who don't live, breathe and sweat baseball, that would be...?

I believe that would 1995.