Discussion in 'Star Trek Movies: Kelvin Universe' started by King Daniel Paid CBS Plant, Mar 19, 2012.
was brought back by a kiss from
T'Pau, the old crinkly version from TOS.
Chekov had a thing for older ladies
ever since he broke up with Irina
whose youthful inexperience left Chekov wanting more
experienced lovers who could rock his body.
T'Pau was just his type: cold, aloof
and obsessed with Russian history. She liked
correcting people's misconception that most inventions were
from Old Earth Russia and insisted on
playing the Soviet national anthem whenever she
presided over ritual killings of French cooks.
The lirpa was frequently used to destroy
all who stood T'Pau's path, for she
was determined to crush any and all
semblance of a good time. She hated
men, BlackSheHitler, and oranges, strangely enough.
She began her genocidal campaign by squeezing
cantaloupes on Aisle 47 while simultaneously gargling
Massengill. The spectacle confused and frightened many
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