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Nov. Challenge. Sniper: The Negotiator

captcalhoun

Admiral
Admiral
Author's Notes: Parente's name is pronounced Pah-ren-tay. The title is shamelessly stolen from General Kenobi's nickname in Revenge of the Sith.

sniper.jpg


2364
Starbase 233

Bobbi March strolled along the corridor of the space-station. Ignoring the other Starfleet personnel passing by, she wondered why she’d been summoned to Admiral Harris’ office. Peace had been established with the Cardassians, at least for the time being. The Romulans remained isolated and incommunicado. The Talarians had been no threat for several years. The Orion Syndicate had been less of a threat after Bobbi’s own top-secret mission three years previously, which had resulted in several key members being assassinated. As she approached Harris’ office, Bobbi finally decided to stop speculating and wait to see what happened.

Inside the admiral’s office, Bobbi found two other officers, beside Harris, waiting.

“Ah, March, good. This is Lieutenant Commander Luis Parente and Lieutenant Thokov, from Internal Affairs. You’ll be working with them on a new mission.”

Bobbi looked the pair over. Parente was a somewhat swarthy looking muscular man, his dark skin betraying his Portuguese origins. Thokov was a male Andorian with a much more slender build. Parente didn’t look particularly happy to see her, while Thokov looked as inscrutable as a Vulcan.

“What’s the mission?” she asked.

“Lieutenant Sophie Burns has gone AWOL. She was a research assistant at Starfleet R&D with access to classified weapons research. She stole files on a few prototype weapons. We’ve discovered evidence that suggests she may attempt to sell the files to hostile races. A deep-cover Intelligence operative has reported spotting her on Chalnoth. We believe she may be meeting potential buyers there,” Parente explained.

“Why am I involved?” Bobbi asked, not seeing the connection.

“Basically, you’re going to be back-up.”

Bobbi nodded. She done something similar once before, acting as back-up for an Intelligence officer during a meeting with a mole. It had been dull, boring and routine. A visit to the notoriously anarchic planet Chalnoth was likely to be none of those.

Chalnoth
Two weeks later

Bobbi pushed her way through the crowded market place. Although Chalnoth was regarded as an anarchic planet and lacked a central government, it did have people buying and selling foods. The ferocious looking aliens were snarling and barking in their own language as Bobbi pushed past them, trying to keep her cloak pulled close to conceal the modified pulse rifle she carried. After nearly a fortnight on the planet, Parente and Thokov had finally tracked down the errant Lieutenant.

Finally, Bobbi found a fairly intact, reasonably tall building and pushed her way inside. Minutes later, she was lying atop the roof, still concealed by her hooded cloak and watching Sophie Burns as she sat outside a bustling bar. Bobbi scanned the street with her rifle’s telescopic sight. Thokov and Parente approached Sophie. The human was wearing a concealed communicator, while Bobbi wore a small earpiece that enabled her to listen in.

Bobbi tried to relax as the pair closed on the Lieutenant. It wasn’t easy to do as the entire city was a free-fire zone for five different gangs trying to control the area. Running light-fights were an almost hourly occurrence. The sound of weapons fire was always audible, only the distance between it and you changed.

“Lieutenant,” Parente said as he stopped next to Sophie. Startled, the woman looked up.

“Yes?”

“My name is Lieutenant Commander Parente. I’ve been sent to negotiate with you for the files you stole.”

“You mean you’re here to arrest me, don’t you?”

“No. Internal Affairs wants to arrest you. R&D merely want the files back. So, I’m here to try to compromise with you. We’ll pay you for the files and you can leave. IA can try to find you some other time.”

“Really? High and mighty Starfleet is willing to compromise with a defector and thief?” Sophie snorted. “Hardly the behaviour you’d expect.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time,” Thokov put in quietly.

Sophie considered that. “I want a million Cardassian Leks.”

“Cardassian currency?”

“They were the ones who were buying the files. That was the offer they made. I may be prepared to negotiate the currency, but I want at least an equivalent amount.”

“Considering the Cardassians have sealed their borders lately, I doubt you’ll be able to spend the leks.”

“As I said, the currency is open to negotiation. Klingon Darseks, say…”

Parente said nothing for a moment. “I’ll have to get back to you,” he finally said. “That’s a rather large amount of money.”

“I should hurry,” Sophie replied. “My Cardassian contacts are meeting me soon.”

Parente didn’t reply as he stood up, glanced back to where Bobbi was watching, then left, Thokov trailing behind.

Bobbi stayed put. Her job now was to wait for Sophie to leave, then track her to wherever she was staying.

Bobbi spent an hour watching Sophie through her sniper scope. Unable to figure out what the traitor was up to, Bobbi had no choice but to remain in place and wait for her to leave.

Finally, two Cardassians, dressed in civilian clothes, arrived and sat down in front of Sophie. Bobbi continued to watch. Since the Cardassians had their backs to her, she had to rely on lip-reading what Sophie was saying. She was clearly negotiating for the sale of the files.

After several minutes of back-and-forth, the taller Cardassian handed Sophie a PADD. She pulled a smaller datapad from her jacket. She started to hand it over.

Bobbi didn’t hesitate, she fired her rifle. The energy pulse shattered the pad and hit Sophie in the chest. The woman slumped forward, a large burn decorating the front of her shirt.

The Cardassian scooped up the PADD he’d handed to Sophie whilst his companion looked around, trying to spot the shooter. Bobbi remained absolutely still, barely breathing. Finally, she watched the spoon-heads hurry off, leaving the dead woman behind. Bobbi scrambled to her feet, hid her rifle under the cloak and scurried from the building.

Swiftly crossing the street, she approached the body. She hadn’t intended to kill Sophie, merely to destroy the datapad. Bobbi looked at the dead woman, then as she saw a group of Chalnoth approaching, she hurried into the crowds thronging the streets.

It took Bobbi another two hours to finally make it to the city’s spaceport and the non-descript battered shuttle that the three Starfleet officers had flown in on.

Bobbi entered the cockpit to see Parente looking expectant.

“Sophie’s dead,” she told him.

“What the hell happened?” Parente demanded. “You were supposed to follow her, not kill her!”

“She met the Cardassians,” Bobbi snarled. “An hour after you left, two of them showed up. They haggled over her fee and then she started to hand over a datapad. I shot the pad to stop the Cardies getting it, but the pulse hit Sophie and killed her. The Cardies took back the PADD they gave her and booked. I got out and spent the last two hours trying to get back here.”

“Why would she meet the Cardassians?” Parente asked.

“Because she wasn’t being straight with you!” Bobbi shouted. “She probably told you what she wanted to see how much Starfleet would pay to get the files back, then use it as leverage with the Cardassians. She was negotiating with you in bad faith, she strung you along!”

Parente sighed. After several moments of silence, he turned to the controls. “Strap in, Lieutenant, we’re leaving.”

Moments later, the shuttle took off and climbed for space.

Bobbi sat in the back of the cockpit, contemplating the fact that she’d never killed a human before and wondering if she’d do it again.

Bobbi March will return…
 
This is a good story as it stands, but I'm disappointed because I was expecting more to fit with the challenge.

I guess the original theft of the files counts as bad faith on the Lieutenant's part but that's not really part of this story, that's just a framing device - the supposed bad faith negotiation with the Federation didn't happen for long enough to count, in fact the Lieutenant was perfectly upfront with Parente and Thokov - she had arranged the meeting with the Cardassians and they needed to come back with as good or better offer before then. They didn't, so she went ahead and dealt with the Cardassians.

I was waiting for the deception within this story - either that one of the negotiators would make their own deal, or that they would betray the Lieutenant as she was surrendering, or that Bobbi would think she was capable of the firefight when she wasn't.


(as a nitpicking aside - there's no way Bobbi would have been able to follow the Lieutenant from where she was on the rooftop with a rifle. If you want a person in position to follow a suspect, they need to be at street-level.)
 
Jeez - you don't need to act so injured, I haven't just eaten your cat!

Of course I'm not an FBI surveillance expert. It's common sense. If the Lieutenant leaves the table and walks away, Bobbi has got to pack away the rifle and then head down to the ground floor of the building and out onto the street. How is she now going to be able to find the Lieutenant in a crowded marketplace where you've described running light-fights between gangs (great phrase btw). Short answer is she isn't. Not unless Parente and Thokov have planted a tracking device on the Lieutenant.

I don't have a problem with Bobbi being on the roof with a scoped rifle. It makes perfect sense on such a chaotic planet to have armed back up to make sure no-one stages an ambush. So all that needs to change in your story is that any references to Bobbi being there to follow the Lieutenant are changed to Bobbi being there to prevent an ambush or something like that.

Or you can leave it as it is - I did say it was just a nit-picking point.
 
but, they're on a planet where 99.999% of the population are Chalnoth and she's one human woman who's not particularly hiding. Bobbi could easily watch her leave, stand up, shove the rifle back under her cloak and dash down out of the building into the street and then follow her at a distance.

and i stole 'light-fight' from Michael Stackpole's 'X-Wing' novels
 
I liked it, and it was nice to see Bobbi make a mistake in killing Sophie (well perhaps nice is the wrong word).

I do kinda agree with Trampledamage though I'm afraid (sorry). Nobody expects you to be an FBI survelliance expert, but it doesn't hurt to do some reading up on the kinds of techniques used by MI5, the FBI FSB etc.

Irrespective of Sophie being the only human there's still a lot of places she could hide in the time it takes Bobbi to get down to street level. It's also unlikely Starfleet would just have one operative following, standard practice would call for up to three (The ABC techniqe) with A following the subject, B following A, and C somewhere ahead of the subject (the 3 then alter positions regularly so the subject doesn't constantly notice the same person behind them. Also if Sophie stands out like a sore thumb then so would Bobbi following her.

I also thought it could have been explained better when they didn't just arrest her. They outnumber her three to one?

You're a good writer, closing up little plot holes would make you a better one.

I hope that comes across as constructive, I did like this!!
 
the fact is though, they were negotiating with her in bad faith...and no-one's even noticed that!

Bobbi gets huffy about her being a bad-faith negotiator, yet the 'fleet was doing it!
 
I think he means that Bobbi thought they were there to take her down, not make a deal with her.

I could be wrong however!
 
the IA peeps were telling Sophie that they were making a deal, but were planning to arrest her. thus they were negotiating in bad faith. Bobbi gets strident about Sophie dealing with the Cardies, but doesn't consider what the IA peeps were doing. i thought it was obvious, but apparently i've fallen victim to what i said in Tim's thread.
 
Oh right okay. I took Parente at his word when he said that he was there to compromise. I see now that he does say IA want to arrest her, and we know - but Sophie doesn't - that he's IA. I didn't make that connection.

You should have pointed this out earlier when I said I could see no bad faith in the story - you would have got yourself another vote!


ETA: Just seen that you're winning now anyway!
 
i was actually waiting for a)someone else to notice and comment and b)the chance that i'd wind up winning as sole entrant again.
 
Interesting story. Like Starkers, I was surprised (and a little pleased) to see that Bobbi is human, and makes mistakes on occasion.

The element of bad faith is certainly there, though it's a fairly minor point in the story.

Here's a scenario you might not have considered, which would also explain the one-woman surveillance that others have complained about.

Parente decided (for some reason) that it was too risky to try to arrest the traitor, so he and his partner left--leaving only the sniper to cover the deal from a distance, knowing that, if the deal with the Cardassians went down, Bobbi would likely do what she does best.

That way, Parente would be able to report "mission accomplished," and shift any blame for the mission's bloody end onto Bobbi's shoulders.

"You were supposed to arrest her, not terminate her!"

"That wasn't my fault! The sniper acted without orders, on her own initiative!"

Similarly, had Bobbi missed, he could have blamed her for not stopping the deal.

Just a thought. Like I said: good story.
 
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