We have been friends for 25 years, I think we can say our friendship is very stable.
Negative friends
- Thread starter Miss Chicken
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We have been friends for 25 years, I think we can say our friendship is very stable.
Given that I probably count as the negative/annoying friend I won't get into that - mr trampledamage is a saint for putting up with me 
However, techie point about the DVD player - many players are multi-region but only after you input a code via the remote control. You / she / someone else who's good at this needs to look up that model on the internet and find out the details.
However, techie point about the DVD player - many players are multi-region but only after you input a code via the remote control. You / she / someone else who's good at this needs to look up that model on the internet and find out the details.
Given that I probably count as the negative/annoying friend I won't get into that - mr trampledamage is a saint for putting up with me
However, techie point about the DVD player - many players are multi-region but only after you input a code via the remote control. You / she / someone else who's good at this needs to look up that model on the internet and find out the details.
It is different in Australia because the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission (ACCC) ruled the DVD region coding was anti-competitive and therefore Region Encoded DVD players are not allowed to be sold in Australia. The stores must make sure that the DVDs players are unlocked before they are sold.
I told my friend it might simply be a PAL vs NTSC problem and that she should see if she can change it from PAL to NTSC on her new player using her remote control.
Unfortunately, there are people that will just feed off you no matter what you do to try to make them happy. Some people just aren't compatible with each other. In that case, it often unfortunately means that the person just isn't worth being friends with. I think that's what Being Erica was trying to show in that one episode, Jenny on the Block. Things like this might be cruel to do, but sometimes they have to happen.
Given that I probably count as the negative/annoying friend I won't get into that - mr trampledamage is a saint for putting up with me
However, techie point about the DVD player - many players are multi-region but only after you input a code via the remote control. You / she / someone else who's good at this needs to look up that model on the internet and find out the details.
It is different in Australia because the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission (ACCC) ruled the DVD region coding was anti-competitive and therefore Region Encoded DVD players are not allowed to be sold in Australia. The stores must make sure that the DVDs players are unlocked before they are sold.
I told my friend it might simply be a PAL vs NTSC problem and that she should see if she can change it from PAL to NTSC on her new player using her remote control.
If it is a PAL/NTSC issue then Region 2 (UK) DVDs should work.
I'm not friends with people I don't like.
If you enjoy some aspects of them, but not others, apply firm, open and consistent boundaries around the behaviour you don't like, and decide in advance for yourself how much leeway you wish to give them around those limits.
If they can't fit in within them to your satisfaction, I refer you back to my very first sentence...
Oddly, I'm one of the more positive among my friends. Which amuses me greatly.
You must have some really depressing friends!
Oddly enough for me, I used to be one of the single happiest, optimistic people in the world. In junior high, I was voted "Happiest Boy" in the entire 400 person class.
I used to have friends like that, Miss Chicken. I was so desperate for friends that I put up with whatever they dished out. Then, one day, it dawned on me that I always felt worse after being with them than I was before. As I am prone to depression anyway, I decided it was better to be alone and happy than with a group and miserable.
There's nothing wrong with being in a bad mood, being a cynic, being sarcastic, being jaded, needing a shoulder to cry on, or even generally having low expectations---but being a fucking MISERY to be around? I don't think so. Friends are supposed to make you feel better when you're around them. If you flipping dread every phone call from that person, if that person makes everything less pleasant, then stop going out with that person. If that person demands a reason, then give it to them. Maybe she might learn something from it. Either way, this person hardly sounds like a friend. Selfish, miserable wet blanket? Yes. Friend? Not so much.
There's nothing wrong with being in a bad mood, being a cynic, being sarcastic, being jaded, needing a shoulder to cry on, or even generally having low expectations---but being a fucking MISERY to be around? I don't think so. Friends are supposed to make you feel better when you're around them. If you flipping dread every phone call from that person, if that person makes everything less pleasant, then stop going out with that person. If that person demands a reason, then give it to them. Maybe she might learn something from it. Either way, this person hardly sounds like a friend. Selfish, miserable wet blanket? Yes. Friend? Not so much.
Given that I probably count as the negative/annoying friend I won't get into that - mr trampledamage is a saint for putting up with me
However, techie point about the DVD player - many players are multi-region but only after you input a code via the remote control. You / she / someone else who's good at this needs to look up that model on the internet and find out the details.
It is different in Australia because the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission (ACCC) ruled the DVD region coding was anti-competitive and therefore Region Encoded DVD players are not allowed to be sold in Australia. The stores must make sure that the DVDs players are unlocked before they are sold.
I told my friend it might simply be a PAL vs NTSC problem and that she should see if she can change it from PAL to NTSC on her new player using her remote control.
They should but their are things that will slip through. I bought a DVD player from HN that was sold to me as multi-region but was still locked. A simple call to the store fixed that and they told me the code. Before your friend wastes $1.90 have her call the store first.
You must have some really depressing friends!
Oddly enough for me, I used to be one of the single happiest, optimistic people in the world. In junior high, I was voted "Happiest Boy" in the entire 400 person class.
Eh, deep down I am bizarrely optimistic about a lot of things. My friends are about as cynical as I am, but without that hopeful undercurrent. It isn't really depressing, though. We find humor in the messed up state of life and the world we live in.
When my friend is in a good mood she is great to be around. If everything had gone to plan on Tuesday we would have enjoyed ourselves.
I think it is just that she can't cope with things not being the way she wants them to be.
One day, I was meant to met her in the city to go and celebrate her birthday by having lunch together. I left in plenty of time and a few stops later her sister, who was also going to have lunch with us, got the bus. Unfortunately the bus broke down and we ended up being about 20 minutes late. My friend was quite angry with us when we arrived. Now if it had been me I might have been a little worried while I waited but when the situation was explained to me I would have been pleased it was nothing serious. However my friend moaned all the way to the restaurant though she did cheer up once we got there.
I'm not friends with people I don't like.
If you enjoy some aspects of them, but not others, apply firm, open and consistent boundaries around the behaviour you don't like, and decide in advance for yourself how much leeway you wish to give them around those limits.
If they can't fit in within them to your satisfaction, I refer you back to my very first sentence...
Get out of here with your reasonable approaches! This is Misc!
I value time spent in solitude over time spent in the company of fools. There are some people who are worthy of respect, and I cherish those few. The rest do not earn a place among my friends or private associations. As a result of this, I get along well with everyone.
A lot of the advice you're getting from people here is along the lines of telling her to shut up or go.
But that's a policy that looks like it's only going to turn out one way: with you both parting your ways.
The question is, do you want that outcome?
If you want a different outcome, such as mending the relationship, then you'll need to drill into her to find the underlying problem and why she is making all these random criticisms.
If she is made to understand how her constant criticisms are making your time with her unhappy, she'll hopefully have enough trust in your friendship to open up.
I would dump her as a friend.
If this would happen frequently there would come a point where i would bring it out in the open and confront that person about their negativity.
When i go out and meet friends i want to have fun.. now being outside you have to realize that things won't always go your way. You can get stuck in traffic (it's a risk you take when using main streets), people may annoy you and all kinds of other stuff.
When i go to the movies i fully expect that there will be other people who want to see that movie too.. this is standard so bitching about there being other people is the height of.. let's call it stupidity.
Modern theaters are built that rarely, if ever, your view gets obstructed (you'd have to have a giant sitting in front of you to be affected). It's not like when i was a kid and the seating rows were on the same level as yours and having a big person in front of you was a real problem.
So i would confront her and bring it out in the open and especially mention that it affects you negatively when all she does is bitch and moan about things that are really normal or unavoidable.
As to the DVD player.. maybe the region free mode needs to be unlocked. I've had such a player ages ago and had to navigate several menues and input a code to unlock it. Google the model and see what comes up.. maybe others had the same problem.
When i go out and meet friends i want to have fun.. now being outside you have to realize that things won't always go your way. You can get stuck in traffic (it's a risk you take when using main streets), people may annoy you and all kinds of other stuff.
When i go to the movies i fully expect that there will be other people who want to see that movie too.. this is standard so bitching about there being other people is the height of.. let's call it stupidity.
Modern theaters are built that rarely, if ever, your view gets obstructed (you'd have to have a giant sitting in front of you to be affected). It's not like when i was a kid and the seating rows were on the same level as yours and having a big person in front of you was a real problem.
So i would confront her and bring it out in the open and especially mention that it affects you negatively when all she does is bitch and moan about things that are really normal or unavoidable.
As to the DVD player.. maybe the region free mode needs to be unlocked. I've had such a player ages ago and had to navigate several menues and input a code to unlock it. Google the model and see what comes up.. maybe others had the same problem.
If you've known her for 25 years, you must've had to put up with behavior like the stuff in the movie parking lot before. If she's always that difficult, then she must have some redeeming qualities as well to keep the friendship going that long. You also must also know by now that she'll probably never change.
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