Movie Caption Contest #59: Just a Suggestion

[Rat Boy]

Hey, take that next exit, because it's time for another caption contest. First, we have to take care of...

First, we have the image of Kirk, Spock, and Gillian in a pickup truck. The winner decided to tell the cruelest joke possible and therefore the funniest:

Jim: Just because we're in an 'ancient Earth automobile' with a woman does not mean you should bring up Edith.

And what can be said about the winner of the second picture that hasn't been said about the Hindenburg disaster? For the image of Data and Picard with B-4's head, we find out the slowest sentient life form in the shot happens to be the smartest:

B-4:"Yes. Please. Put me away and close the lid.

The movie only gets stupider from here on out."

Our Photoshop winner is new to the honor and comes up with an interesting take on a classic joke:

A priest, a Buddhist and a cross-dressing Rabbi are driving down the road...

Atavachron

Congratulations to Gagarin, cooleddie74, and Atavachron. Here's the current totals:

Nerys Myk (Hall of Fame) 31
Year of Hell (Hall of Fame) 27
cooleddie74 (Hall of Fame) 22
Gertch 17
The Laughing Vulcan 15
Shatmandu 14
Outpost4 13
Turd Ferguson 10
scottydog 9
Nebusj 9
BriGuy 9
EliyahuQeoni 9
Diesel Micky Dolenz 9
Triskelion 9
Kegek 8
cultcross 7
zephramac 7
DS9Sega 6
Tharpdevenport 6
John_Picard 5
SciFi75 5
middyseafort 5
CaptainJon 4
Haggis and Tatties 4
Skywalker 4
The Cutest of Borg 4
NCC-1701 4
Defcon 4
Kirby 4
LeadHead 4
Finn 4
Sisu 3
David_Leese 3
archerguy1701 3
Starpaul20 3
ancient 3
chancellorjake 3
jptrekker 3
Bad Atom 3
J. Allen 2
Arthur Frelling Dent 2
SeerSGB 2
Lloyd_Dobbler 2
Peach Wookie 2
nil_jones 2
OphaClyde 2
Atavachron 2
Gagarin 2
cardinal biggles 1
Vasquez Rocks 1
Valin 1
Nathan_Heller 1
Guartho 1
Alyssa 1
A beaker full of death 1
rmkwebdesign 1
Starlock 1
Redshirts Widow 1
Admiral Garak 1
Broccoli 1
Mister.Woof 1
The Squire of Gothos 1
A Chimpanzee & 2 Trainees 1
battrekker 1
DrBob 1
Sector7 1
USS Mariner 1
hmbnimbus 1
S'Kai 1
H F Mudd 1
dukesman 1
Fire 1
Super Grover 1
Herkimer Jitty 1


This week we again have but two shots. First one is from the fifth movie, where Shatner offers a few pointers on acting to Takei while Koenig tries not to laugh at the irony of it all. The second is from that classic scene from Generations where Picard tells Riker not to scratch the paint. Oops.

 

[Rat Boy]

Chekov (thinking): The keptin never pats me on the back and tells me to meet him in his quarters.

Worf (thinking): The captain never whispers sweet nothings in my ear.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: Come on, Sulu, let's leave that smelly Russian fella here on the ship while the rest of us beam down and have a grand adventure.
Chekov: But adventure is a Russian inwention.

Picard: Commander Riker, would you join in me in a laugh?
Riker: Sure, Captain.
Picard: Mr. Worf's head looks like a fanny.
(Laughter from the bridge crew)
Worf: You can both suck my ridges!

 

[scottydog]

Kirk: "Sulu, there are men back here pointing their behinds at you."

 

[scottydog]

Picard: "Worf's station is a urinal?"

 

[Brian]

Kirk: "Sulu, for the last time, get the gay porn off the helm console! You know it makes Chekov uncomfortable!"

Picard: "He's standing right behind me, isn't he?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Picard: "Worf's station is a urinal?"

Worf: "And since you gave me this chair, now it's a shitter."

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Kirk: Is that velour? I love velour.

Chekov: Keptain never feels my jacket...

Picard: -and furthermore, he's supposed to be a big, tough Klingon, but he basically gets beat up by every Joe Bumpface and Johnny Pointy-ears that comes aboard.

Riker: Uhh, sir-

Picard: What?

Worf: Grrr...

Picard: Oh.

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "You've had our turn signal on since we left Earth, Asian."

Picard: "After Movie Night last week, the crew keep looking at the shape of my head and then pretending that a life form is bursting from their chests, Numbah One ..."

 

[scottydog]

Kirk: "...and ah-one, and ah-two, and ah-three...."

Chekov: "I hate the Keptin's Richard Simmons tape."

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"You're it!!

GAY Crew Tag!!!"

PICARD:"...and then according to Captain Kirk's logs from the Nimbus III rescue mission, the Enterprise-A senior officers celebrated afterwards with a most disturbing game of Gay Crew Tag.

The results of which were rapidly classified by Starfleet Command to this very day."

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"Can you relieve the crewmen standing at the Monitor Situation station back there? All their lazy asses are doing is huddling around that new Playstation game they brought aboard."

 

[Nerys Myk]

WORF: I wish the Captain would a little move to the right. I need to check my make up

 

[Turd Ferguson]

Koenig: *Sigh* So we go from the revered Robert Wise to Nicholas Meyer to Leonard Nimoy to Shatner. Jesus. I wonder who the hell they'll get next?

"And, if anything should happen, it's very important that you remember that outdated Klingon Birds of Prey are not covered in standard Federation insurance policies."

 

[cooleddie74]

SHATNER:"You're fired, George, the next time you badmouth my toupee or directing skills."

TAKEI:"Sorry, Bill. SHEEESH. Can't you take a joke?"

KOENIG:"I thought your toupee and directing skills were the same thing."

"Say, Number One...if I say Mister Worf's head looks like a fanny, do you think you can..."

WORF:"NO!!!

I am not enduring that AGAIN!! Enough is enough, sirs!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

KOENIG:"Please, God.

Kill me now."

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: There, I'm still straight. It's not contagious Chekov!

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"Hey.

You holdin'?"

CHEKOV:"Sheeet.

And de one day I forgot to bring my lighter."

 

[Rat Boy]

Chekov (thinking): Vhat's that sound? It sounds almost like a girdle about to burst open.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Kirk's pre-mission superstitions included touching the helmsman. Originally it was a yeoman, but a lawsuit ended that one.