MISCELLANEOUS FLASHBACK: "What if TrekBBS was an Actual Bulletin Board?"

Heigh ho friends, I am a longtime member who has not posted anything on TrekBBS for well over a decade, so it will be no surprise to find that few if any of you know (or care) who I am. Back in the day though, young'ns, I would post approximately 40-500 times a day (or so it seemed) and very often I would post some homemade, off-the-wall zaniness. I have returned today because I was digging through some old image files and found one of my old favorites, an exercise I called "What if TrekBBS was an Actual Bulletin Board?" I'm guessing I dreamed up this lunatic thing somewhere around 2003-2004, so if much of the content seems confusing (what the hell was "The Briar Patch?") I don't blame you. However, it was deemed pretty funny for its day and I thought I would share, if for no other reason than for auld lang syne. Maybe one of you whippersnappers can create your own updated version.

Attached with this post is the entire "bulletin board", and subsequent posts will feature each section close up so you can make out what the hell it all says, as if that would make it more comprehensible. In any case, enjoy! Or don't! But it's nice to share some classic TBBS with you.

- Image removed by moderator

 

John! awesome to see you, how are you doing?

 

- Image removed by moderator

 

SANTAMAN!!!!! LOVE YOU BABY!

 

Oh yeah and I also found this

 

^^ I remember that one..

 

No, no, no, you wouldn't be able to read the bulletin board, because every time you come in there is some douchebag standing there placing a giant descending Orange Crush soda ad over the other ads. Then some dipshit named UGO is flying dragons cut-outs over it and his friend is saying "Electrical superstorms?!".

 

None of the images are visible for me.

 

Hey I remember you! And yeah, what IS all this crap???

 

Well shoot. Sorry about that

 

I remember you, too.

All that was the horror days of UGO ads. the Orange Crush ad descended down and took up like 80% of the page. The "electrical superstorms?!" line was a trailer for that film I can't recall the name of that Christopher Young scored; the ad played live with sound. The dragon flew across the screen and would slow or even freeze it (probably for some film advertisement).
I actually have a screen grab of the Orange Crush ad, somewhere (not handy).

Of course, UGO has been replaced with the new horror of Google AdSense which causes the people in charge to have to be worried about what might offend the Asshole Google Gods. That's why we can't have nice things like the penisrock.

LOL, I remember when I found out about it by accident after returning to the board after a long absence and had no idea it would be a no-no. I entered a D.S.9. Caption This! contest with Kira sitting in the Defiant command chair with her legs spread, so I put a penisrock there. I think I saved the picture.

 

I remember you @Shatna !

As for these bulletin boards... holy shit.

I can only take so many classic TrekBBS moments. Excuse me while I process ...

Meanwhile, I found this. A screenshot from some point in 2002 just before Big Blue turned in to Big Grey. And I was a mod! Such power. Oh and it actually ran on software that claimed to be a 'bulletin board'.

 

I feel like I missed it -- I didn't even see what was not allowed; I didn't explore the image in full.

 

T'Bonz in a bottle.. NEW! fiery red for the stylish Romulan! Suply limited, not sold in California.