Mental Wellness Support Group

[TribbleFeeder]

I was diagnosed with low-level paranoia and ruminations about 15 years ago or so and was prescribed Risperidone. I took it for about ten years or so with mostly no issues unless I couldn't fill my prescription (thank you, American medical industry) and then I went full-on psychotic, and I mean no-holds-barred.

I've finally been able to wean myself off of it over the last year or so with a doctor's help, so I'm back to my base level, but the thing is, there is is that base level paranoia. Nothing as you experience and describe, @TribbleEater, but enough to get me into trouble...a lot.

I’m so glad to hear you’re doing better and have worked through it. It’s not an easy fight to battle, your strength is hope for me.

I’m not excited about having a steady regiment of meds. There are aspects of me, my mind, and the way I experience life that the meds take away (at least some of the more powerful ones I’ve been prescribed). I’m so afraid of losing myself again but I know it’s probably necessary at this point that I start listening to the people around me. I feel sick thinking back on how much my mental instability has burdened them.

Like @boohbarbodendron said, at least we’re talking about this kind of thing. It’s a good first step for me and hopefully for some others.

 

[Sibyl]

you got away from these meds almost all on your own? Wow! That's impressive. You must have a lot of willpower and self-control. Did you try stopping the meds all at once or did you reduce the dose gradually?

With my doctor's supervision, I gradually reduced my dosage. I would not have survived had I gone cold-turkey.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

yep, that was a wise decision. My doc trusted me enough to leave the reduction entirely to me but nevertheless I was glad that he was standing by for emergencies.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

Just need to vent a bit - shall be feeling better directly.

Neither my siblings nor I have kids and when I get old and possibly need medical care I need someone I can rely upon to make the decisions I would make myself if I could. There is a legal procedure here that enables me to name someone who acts in my name. However, my brother and sister-in-law are not reliable and my sister (who already did that for my grandaunt and uncle) reacts hysterical if I only hint at the problem.
Just now she screamed at me to leave her alone when I only asked her who might be able to advise me to sort my matters so that she has nothing at all to do with it. I am so sick and tired of her always getting a fit and everyone having to tiptoe around her lest she freaks out. She terrorizes all the family with that and doesn't [want to] realize that.
She always thinks she's the only one with worries. I'll get pensioned off in 12 years, my health is not good, my brother will systematically try to push me out of my parents' house. And the idea of being in a nursing home and ruled by some official for lack of a family is not exactly alluring.

Sometimes life stinks (still, it's better than the alternative).
Pheew, now I'm feeling better.
I'll try to contact some distant cousins and their kids. I have a decade for getting to know them and maybe one is willing to take care of an old auntie in the future.

 

[Butters]

Just need to vent a bit - shall be feeling better directly.

Neither my siblings nor I have kids and when I get old and possibly need medical care I need someone I can rely upon to make the decisions I would make myself if I could. There is a legal procedure here that enables me to name someone who acts in my name. However, my brother and sister-in-law are not reliable and my sister (who already did that for my grandaunt and uncle) reacts hysterical if I only hint at the problem.
Just now she screamed at me to leave her alone when I only asked her who might be able to advise me to sort my matters so that she has nothing at all to do with it. I am so sick and tired of her always getting a fit and everyone having to tiptoe around her lest she freaks out. She terrorizes all the family with that and doesn't [want to] realize that.
She always thinks she's the only one with worries. I'll get pensioned off in 12 years, my health is not good, my brother will systematically try to push me out of my parents' house. And the idea of being in a nursing home and ruled by some official for lack of a family is not exactly alluring.

Sometimes life stinks (still, it's better than the alternative).
Pheew, now I'm feeling better.
I'll try to contact some distant cousins and their kids. I have a decade for getting to know them and maybe one is willing to take care of an old auntie in the future.

Reliable siblings are rare as rocking horse shit. I’m lucky to have kids and I hope they’re in a position to support us in our frailty. But the siblings are no use. One died, not her fault and I miss her dearly. The other one resides in a reality so alien to my experience that she might as well live on planet Bong. We don’t speak to the brother in law because he’s a cunt, sorry no, he’s an absolute utter cunt.

Some people seem to have these huge support networks of siblings and inlaws that look out for each other, but it’s a lie. When splitting the spoils of bereavement they fly their true colours.

I am a firm believer in the welfare state and social care, no one should have to rely on family.

Anyway. I’m off my meds. They were the minimum prescribable dose and caused insomnia, but not without weird dreams. Since stopping, I’ve been woken by the alarm, first time in a month. But the strange and frustrating dreams persist.

 

[Gary Mitchell]

Sometimes life stinks

Since stopping, I’ve been woken by the alarm, first time in a month. But the strange and frustrating dreams persist.

Sorry guys.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

thank you, Gary It was just a moment of weakness.
I just ran through my family tree and found that I must have at least three 2nd cousins of whom at least one has several children. So there are 5+x potential helpers. Conveniently, they all live just 1-2 hours by train from me.
From an orbituary I learned that I have several cousins twice removed who live only 1 hour from my parents. I've never met any of them but it could be fun to get to know them.
And in the worst case there are two class mates of mine who might perhaps be willing to fill in, in an emergency.

Butters, the dreams are pretty persistent. I made the same experience when I quit taking SSRIs and finished the psychotherapy against my panic attacks. As I used to have only nightmares, I was used to suppress all memory of my dreams completely. After the therapy and the meds I was more relaxed and let my shields down. That was when the crazy dreams started. I think it's just the brain's reaction to being free again. It's experimenting and playing with ideas while at the same time sorting away the emotional rubble. In the process, both get mixed and result in crazy dreams. (Just my theory, though)
It's about 18 months now since I stopped the meds and my dreams are getting less crazy now. There's the occasional nightmare again but that's perfectly normal, after all.
I find that sleeping with an audiobook running helps me a lot. It gives my dreams a margin within which it develops. I subconsciousely pick up elements of the audiobook and weave them into the dreams. This way there's always something familiar in my dreams and they seem less crazy or threatening.

 

[Refuge]

thank you, Gary It was just a moment of weakness.
I just ran through my family tree and found that I must have at least three 2nd cousins of whom at least one has several children. So there are 5+x potential helpers. Conveniently, they all live just 1-2 hours by train from me.
From an orbituary I learned that I have several cousins twice removed who live only 1 hour from my parents. I've never met any of them but it could be fun to get to know them.
And in the worst case there are two class mates of mine who might perhaps be willing to fill in, in an emergency.

Preparing yourself for your future is not weakness, even worrying about it isn't weakness. We all want the security of a roof over our heads and support if we are vulnerable. As a sibling I wish I had told my brother I would be there for him. He was too proud but must have agonised over his future.

Not sure how the social/healthcare systems work from country to country. We have power of attorney and living power of attorney. It IS wise to have one before you need it. Dad was on the brink of getting his second wife authority (matter of a couple of weeks) and his health took a nose dive. When Barbara (second wife) tried to sign on his behalf over inheritance from my brother's estate, my Mum challenged it. What a mess.

Maybe a trusted friend could be an option to act on your behalf? Actually even house sharing with some decent friends could be a thought later on as far as sharing costs and space. We don't have children either, if hubby kicks the bucket before me I can just imagine my nieces and nephews lining up to take care of their Aunty Tracey

 

[rhubarbodendron]

House sharing is what I had in mind. I have 2 siblings and we'll inherit the house together. Fortunately, in a moment of foresight, my dad wrote into his will that none of us can sell the house without an unanimous ok from the other heirs and that all 3 of us have a lifelong right to live there. The prob is only that my brother is a messie and keeps putting his stuff into any free space even now. There are 3 rooms in the basement which we haven't been able to enter for 30 years due to tons of rubbish! Once my parents are dead, he'll mess up the whole house and I'll be too old to stem the tide alone. My sis naively thinks her savings will enable her to live in a rented apartment as she does now. It's utterly illusionary what with inflation, higher taxes, her working part-time most of the time etc. She'll be lucky to have a roof over her head when she gets pensioned off but she refuses to plan ahead. She is even aiming at getting pensioned off prematurely which will get her a cut of about 1/5 of her pension and then she'll inevitably be forced to move in with my brother and me. None of us is wealthy enough to pay out the other two. So I'll be stuck with sharing a house with my siblings and spend my last days tidying up after my brother and walking on eggs around my sister.

Sharing a house with friends and fellow trekkies would be fun! If I win in the lottery and can buy a house I'll do just that

 

[Gryffindorian]

@boohbarbodendron, I'm a single guy with no children. I currently live with family members (parents, brother, sister, her husband and two kids) in a house here in the SF Bay Area. I have three other sisters who live in the area with their own families. We all came to the U.S. in the 1980s, and that's how we have been able to support each other. Even now, rent and home prices are so high that we figure this is the best arrangement. The rest of us pool our resources and look out for each other.

Anyway, when I think about the future, I have yet to worry about who's going to take care of me. You would think a single person like me who lives with diabetes would panic at the thought of growing old. And it has nothing to do with having five siblings and several nephews and nieces. Sure, that's a plus, but I don't see myself as being dependent on them.

That's probably because I have two older friends, both living alone, in their 70s and 80s who are still quite independent. I figure if I take care of myself well enough and be able to work or stay active for as long as I can, I'll manage just fine. One could say this is wishful thinking on my part, but nobody knows what the future - especially the distant future - has in store for all of us. So why worry?

I'm in no way trying to make light of your concerns, but I thought I'd share my own perspectives. Good luck and I wish you the best.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

thank you That was pretty uplifting.
I'm not usually that much of a worrier but when I have too little sleep and/or when I forget to take my diabetes pills I tend to get depressive. Propably a temporary imbalance in the brain's metabolism. (I'd say it's a symptom of severe chocolate deficiency - but my medicine man won't buy that, I'm afraid )

 

[Gryffindorian]

 

[Sibyl]

I'm shaking uncontrollably in my right arm, floaty (not light-headed, but I kinda feel numb-ish all over, anxious as hell, and have a micro-fuse today.

I'm not sure what's happening.

 

[Gary Mitchell]

I'm shaking uncontrollably in my right arm, floaty (not light-headed, but I kinda feel numb-ish all over, anxious as hell, and have a micro-fuse today.

I'm not sure what's happening.

I hope you feel better soon.

 

[think]

I am well today,.. I survived suffering to mostly all degrees of mind/body ailments.

Dr says my brain waves are aligned as schizoeffective
I say that the Dr’s brain waves are random he agrees
I then add that that is no way to think, as focused thoughts in random waves doesn’t last too long,. And thus his life focus appears to end in abrupt confusion..

With the patterned brain wave function evolution is the obvious result,..

With evolving being the integral of life times the change in time from birth to death.. as the change in time limits at zero...

Some can understand others won’t or don’t care,.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

I'm shaking uncontrollably in my right arm, floaty (not light-headed, but I kinda feel numb-ish all over, anxious as hell, and have a micro-fuse today.

I'm not sure what's happening.

How are you today??
If the symptoms persist I advise you see your doctor asap. It is most likely just a flashback from the meds or some other sort of temporary imbalance in the brain's metabolism but the same symptoms can also be caused by a blocked blood vessel or a badly squeezed nerve in your neck, a mini-stroke or an approaching heart attack. These are far less likely but more serious and you shouldn't take a risk. Rather see your doc once too often than once too rarely.

 

[Snaploud]

House sharing is what I had in mind. I have 2 siblings and we'll inherit the house together. Fortunately, in a moment of foresight, my dad wrote into his will that none of us can sell the house without an unanimous ok from the other heirs and that all 3 of us have a lifelong right to live there. The prob is only that my brother is a messie and keeps putting his stuff into any free space even now. There are 3 rooms in the basement which we haven't been able to enter for 30 years due to tons of rubbish! Once my parents are dead, he'll mess up the whole house and I'll be too old to stem the tide alone. My sis naively thinks her savings will enable her to live in a rented apartment as she does now. It's utterly illusionary what with inflation, higher taxes, her working part-time most of the time etc. She'll be lucky to have a roof over her head when she gets pensioned off but she refuses to plan ahead. She is even aiming at getting pensioned off prematurely which will get her a cut of about 1/5 of her pension and then she'll inevitably be forced to move in with my brother and me. None of us is wealthy enough to pay out the other two. So I'll be stuck with sharing a house with my siblings and spend my last days tidying up after my brother and walking on eggs around my sister.

I think my parents have a provision in their will saying that their house has to be sold (with the proceeds divided as part of the estate) within a 30 or 60 day time-frame unless both my brother and I agree to an extension.

 

[Twilight Phoenix]

Hey there, I'm not around anymore but I thought I'd come and see if that topic is still helping people. It seems to be the case, so I'm very glad I did something useful !
Things have been up and down here, but hubby and I started new plans to better manage my anxiety disorder. He'll also finally get external support from an association of care-givers (which goal is to support friends, relatives and partners of neuroatypical and/or mentally disabled people) ! I'm glad !

Sending you all some Latest Kate positivity

 

[TribbleFeeder]

Hey there, I'm not around anymore but I thought I'd come and see if that topic is still helping people. It seems to be the case, so I'm very glad I did something useful !
Things have been up and down here, but hubby and I started new plans to better manage my anxiety disorder. He'll also finally get external support from an association of care-givers (which goal is to support friends, relatives and partners of neuroatypical and/or mentally disabled people) ! I'm glad !

Sending you all some Latest Kate positivity

Glad to hear you’re doing well!! We miss you around here!

 

[Twilight Phoenix]

Glad to hear you’re doing well!! We miss you around here!

You can email me anytime