Machete Order for TNG Films

Discussion in 'Star Trek Movies I-X' started by Lord Garth, Jan 1, 2018.

  1. Lord Garth

    Lord Garth Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    I can watch the TOS Films straight through. One through six.

    The TNG Films not so much. The Star Wars films have a Machete Order (4, 5, 2, 3, 6) So, I decided "Why not try the same thing with TNG?" and figured out a way to watch them, if I want to go through them all.... and it worked. Does anyone else try this?

    I go:

    Nemesis (get the one I think is the worst out of the way first)
    Insurrection (it's harmless fun and gets out the taste of NEM)
    Generations (Kirk's death still almost makes me tear up. Yeah, yeah, whatever, shut up... )
    First Contact (Save the best for last!)
     
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  2. Desert Kris

    Desert Kris Commander Red Shirt

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    Machete order is based on the flashback order (flashback from the end of Empire to witness Anakin's story, starting with The Phantom Menace and doing the whole prequel trilogy); IIRC it's called machete order because it chops out a film that is one of the worst and unnecessary (TPM), arguably.

    So, by that argument, you finish watching the TOS films, and then flashback to, uh, Star Trek (2009). Skip Into Darkness and pick up with Beyond.

    No, wait. Sorry. Okay, so you go from TUC, straight into First Contact, then watch forward from there. And then flashback to Generations, except...skip it, chop it out. So, you're done after Nemesis. Generations with it's unnecessary torch passing is skipped, you don't have to see the shoddy directing and the Enterprise get taken out in a tragically underwhelming way, no weirdness with the uniforms, and none of Data being a basketcase.
     
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  3. Tosk

    Tosk Vice Admiral Admiral

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    The machete order for the TNG films is to just hack them all to death and bury the pieces in a shallow unmarked grave. ;)
     
  4. Takeru

    Takeru Space Police Premium Member

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    Germany, EU, Earth
    Actually it's called machete order because it originated on nomachetejuggling.com.

    I suggest the Takeru order for Star Wars: 4, 5, 6, 7, 8
    The prequels add nothing to the story.

    Takeru order for the TNG movies: Generations, First Contact
    Generations isn't great but at least watchable, First Contact is entertaining even if it doesn't feel like TNG. The others might as well not exist.