I've got a complete draft from April, 1981 that has McGivers in it as a character. I haven't had a chance to actually read it beyond a quick skim, so I can't provide further details yet.As above, I've never seen a script for this film that featured McGivers. Are you sure you don't mean a treatment or a summary?
Well of course. Anything is possible and surely his mental state is the result of everything that happened to him and his group after being left on the planet, but for me what really pushes Khan over the edge is his wife dying.What? Khan could have been just as batshit crazy with McGivers alive, especially if a bunch of his people had died as described.
I seem to remember somebody recently suggesting having Marla in the movie just at the very beginning, on her death bed. So then we actually get to witness the source of Khan's grief and madness for vengeance.
Kor
Huh. Written by?Star Trek: The Genesis Project
Final Draft, April 10, 1981
Jack B. Sowards and Harve BennettHuh. Written by?
TERRELL
Fourteen years ago. And
obviously, the exiles have not
survived.
CHEKOV
No sir. There have been no
life signs on the planet for
many years.
INT. A CAVE OF LAVA ROCK - CLOSE ON MARLA McGIVER
She is in her forties now, watching intently as we
PULL BACK.
KHAN'S VOICE
Yes, Mr. Chekov, Khan. Khan
Noonien Singh, your old friend.
The ANGLE WIDENS to reveal a large cavern, central room
of Khan's underground life space. Khan sits beside Marla
in a large chair. There is an ease and charm about the
man that belies his menace. Khan is not an evil man,
but a genuinely superior one, confidant of his own worth
and set on this earth to fulfill his potential. Marla,
disgruntled by hardship has become his Lady MacBeth.
In the room are a dozen other survivors of his group,
10 MEN, 2 WOMEN, all dressed in rag tag unusual
clothing, all, like Khan, large of size. There is some
evidence of home built scientific equipment about,
most noticeably two clear TUBES about six feet high,
and ominous looking. In mid-room, Terrell and Chekov
stand, surrounded by the group.
KHAN
And of course you remember my
wife, Marla McGiver.
Chekov and Marla exchange stiff nods. Khan rises now,
crosses to the prisoners in an expansive mood.
SPOCK
Thank you, Admiral... Doctor
are you coming back to the ship
with me?
McCOY
I'll meet you at the shuttle.
Spock nods and exits into the distance as Kirk turns
to McCoy in some surprise as they begin walking.
KIRK
"Back to the ship" ... ?
McCOY
I've been meaning to tell you.
I signed on for this shakedown
cruise.
A sadness, or envy comes over Kirk. He covers it.
KIRK
Can't get space out of your bones
Bones?
McCoy shakes his head at this. Then, gently:
McCOY
What about you?
KIRK
Oh, I have my hands full. Running
the Training Command is a
full-time -- sea of papers.
McCOY
Um-hum. Makes a man restless,
irritable and old before his
time.
KIRK
You think I'm getting old, Doctor?
McCOY
Aging, Symptoms of: one,
excessive impatience with young
people, perhaps because of envy
of all they have in front of them:
two, corresponding denial of
one's own vitality and dreams;
three, self induced isolation from
friends and rejection of intimate
relationships; four, pushing papers.
They stop walking. Kirk has no argument.
KIRK
All right. What can I do about
it?
McCOY
Chuck it. Chuck it all and
get yourself a Space Command.
Or resign and start yourself a
new life.
KIRK
What about the good of the service?
McCOY
Tell hell with the service,
Admiral. Long live Jim Kirk.
(moment, then: )
I'll see you when we cast off.
Kirk nods and McCoy exits down the corridor. We HOLD
LONG on Kirk's thoughtful face.
Not really. Her part in the script is pretty much what Joachim is in the final version, just more forgettable.The Lady MacBeth thing intrigues me. Does anything come of that, or is it just a throwaway?
That sorta makes sense if the idea was to introduce new characters and rotate out the other ones. Making Uhura into Yeoman Bland was a bad idea, though.Not really. Her part in the script is pretty much what Joachim is in the final version, just more forgettable.
The biggest character problem in the script is Uhura - she's relegated to being Admiral Kirk's secretary, has maybe three scenes, and is out of the film by the time the Enterprise leaves to Gamma Regula Four around page 40. O'Rourke takes over her role for the rest of the draft.
Well, that at least clarifies what Kirk's regular job in the Admiralty was intended to be.KIRK
Oh, I have my hands full. Running
the Training Command is a
full-time -- sea of papers.
oh that's good. hopefully Meyer will read it and shoot a belated pickup scene and edit in the movie for the 40th ann blu ray. funny thing tho it reminds me of a similar scene in Batman&Robin where Freeze is looking at a little ice sculpture of his wife lolThe scene where Joachim tells Khan that the power has been restored.
Khan is on the bridge just like in the movie, but we only see Khan's open hand at first. In it is a small, metal disk with a tiny hologram of a standing, cloaked figure. The figure's face cannot be seen, but we notice an infant in the figure's arms.
The hologram turn slightly; we see a face of a woman with a gentle smile. It is Marla.
Camera cuts to Joachim: "Power restored, sir."
Camera moves to Khan's face. He looks powerful, yet sad; a small tear can be seen. He wipes it away quickly so no one else on the bridge will see it. A brief look of rage and utter determination crosses his face.
Khan closes the disk with a snap, ending the projection.
"Excellent. More than a match for poor Enterprise."
I have to admit it feels a little "on the nose" to me. I just mean, by this point we know Marla's dead and that her death was probably the straw that broke the camel's back, so...do we need it punctuated?
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