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It's pretend to be a newbie week! I'm Scott Van Hore.

Jayson

Vice Admiral
Admiral
For one week I want everyone to asume a double identy and go with it. Anyways I guess I will give you Scott Van Hore's backstory.


I was born in 1975 to whom I am not sure. As a baby my natural parent tossed me into a dumpster where I would later be found by two homeless drifters named Scott and Van. They were a loving gay couple who lived outside of a town called VanderBeek, Colorado in a cave. I spent my entire youth living in the cave. Scott and Van would bring me food from their travels to VanderBeek. I lost both Scott and Van and my virginity on one faithful summer day when I was 12 years old.

A roaming Mountain Lion that was in heat entered are cave and ate Scott and Van. Curious about me it then made love to me and having never seen a women I thought this was what human females looked like for years. I was held hostage for 4 years by this moutain Lion. We would make love and it would bring me food it found in the forrest. Eventually i got to old for the Moutain Lion. Years later I saw it get busted on "Dateline" Still i was 16 by then and I was ready to see the world so I lfe that cave for the first time in my life.

It just happens the first thing I did when I went to see VanderBeek was a "Star Trek" convention. I was fascinated by all the bright colors and costumes and normal looking people. I knew then i wanted to become a Star Trek fan. I knew I needed a job so I turned to the one thing I knew how to do and became a prostitute.

By this time though i started to develop that disease that makes you afraid to go outdoors. I had the ubber-version of it and I was even afraid to go into rooms in my apartment that had windows. Basically nowdays I spend all my days in the bathroom. I eat,sleep and live in there. I get customers over thei internet. I do pretty good business because of my enlarged espahogus allows me to put three dicks in my mouth at once. Anyways I was looking around the internet and found this website. I thought it looked neat so I signed up.

Anyways I hope I will enjoy this place. It's nice to meet everyone.

Scott
 
Remember way back when I warned you for "mini-modding" in this way, and then did you the courtesy of rescinding it? You'd think it would mean something to you, but you continue to do this anyway. Dude, you're doing it wrong. This thread doesn't need to be closed.. even though it's apparantly what you really want.
 
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I'm not certain whether this is a certain kind of genius post, or retardation. Either way this was ... interesting.
 
I'm not certain whether this is a certain kind of genius post, or retardation. Either way this was ... interesting.


Baby I am so not retarded. I am all man and all girl depending on how much cash you give me. I guess you could say I am sort of a genious. I did make a makeshift tunnel from my bathroom to the kitchen so I could leave without having to endure seeing the windows in the rest of my apartment. I learned a few building skills from this carpenter I use to service back in the late 90's. He would show me how to build things and I would pretend to be his mom. He was a sweet guy but boy was he screwed up in the head.

Scott
 
What if I wore a monkey suit and has a mini skirt on?


Hey sweety, anything that you want to do! Scott aims to please! Not really into animals after my childhood experiences with the mountain Lion but I got to eat so i don't turn down anything!


Scott
 
I have to admit I'm really T'Bonz's dual. I've just been pretending to be an old cranky lady for years so I could get in charge of the board, then disappear and reappear when it's been nine years and promote said event. :p

In my spare time I like to microwave rollie pollies, drink stale cola, and laugh uncontrollably until I wet myself. :D
 
I have to admit I'm really T'Bonz's dual. I've just been pretending to be an old cranky lady for years so I could get in charge of the board, then disappear and reappear when it's been nine years and promote said event. :p

In my spare time I like to microwave rollie pollies, drink stale cola, and laugh uncontrollably until I wet myself. :D


I'm new here so I am not sure who T'Bonz is. Scott knows a thing about old ladies though. He knows how to please them and tease them. Baby if you want ole Scott will pretend to be your Tharpdevenport dual. Just think you could make sweet love to your dual. Perhaps i sould contact T'Bonz and tell her that I Tharpdevenport is ready to be her sex toy. Would that excite you? :)

Scott
 
You've now entered the beginning of a temporal paradox.

In the year 2066 it was revealed that this thread prompted me to ask you to go bakc in time and and steal D. B. Cooper's money, then push him out of the plane, with you disappearing too fast for anybody to see. It's already happened, obviously, but to fully complete the loop you need to go back in time. This will be your payment.


Sadly, knowingly messing with time, and stealing federal money, are both still crimes and you will be severely punished.
 
You've now entered the beginning of a temporal paradox.

In the year 2066 it was revealed that this thread prompted me to ask you to go bakc in time and and steal D. B. Cooper's money, then push him out of the plane, with you disappearing too fast for anybody to see. It's already happened, obviously, but to fully complete the loop you need to go back in time. This will be your payment.


Sadly, knowingly messing with time, and stealing federal money, are both still crimes and you will be severely punished.


No more time travel for ole Scott. He once had sex in a time machine and ended up getting Herpes. Time travel is bad for you I tell you.

Scott
 
Why isn't my avatar showing up ? Why do some of these users have different colours for their names ? I want a different colour!

What's an "Ensign" ?
 
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