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It's not my fault that you're an idiot.

All it takes is one bad customer to ruin your day, if you let them.

Instead, I focus on the good customers, like the little old lady who makes it a point to find me every time she comes into the store, just because she likes talking to me. Or the people who see me outside of work and point me out as the helpful young man at Wal-Mart. Or the look of gratitude and tears of joy when I helped a mother find the right ingredients for a special dinner for her son who was shipping off to Iraq.

So what if I deal with a bad customer? It's the good ones that I focus on.
 
Folks in retail have a unique perspective on how stupid the masses can be. I know, I used to work in retail. Never again.

I worked for Wal-Mart for ten years. I'm currently working on a book about my experiences. It's going to be fucking hilarious, and I don't care if I get sued.
Here's a sampling of some of the bizarre shit I've witnessed:

Two dead, frozen sheep in the parking lot, their intestines scattered all over the pavement.

A guy who'd come in every day and jack off into the children's shoes.

A crazy old preacher with several wives who stopped by on a fairly regular basis to chastise other "hellbound" customers. He always spoke in rhyme.

A particularly stupid manager who called a meeting and accused us all of embezzlement because someone had eaten some of his fudgesickles.

An ex-employee who was discovered living in the sewer underneath the store. He had it all decorated up like some kind of one-room apartment.

It just goes on and on...

Dude, that's a great idea, and I think it will sell. I think you can just get away with calling it "Ball-Mart" or something, no?
Actually, among my peeps, I can refer to the "Belly of the Beast", and they know I'm talking about Wal-Mart.

As for the sale thing -
I have some experience with the retail thing, though it was Conveinence Stores, which is a different animal. At least you don't get Scratch-off ticket Junkies in Wal-Mart. It's a sad sight to see. And they tie up the lines terribly.
Lotto. Making Conveinent stores Inconveinent since 1984.

You really do have to let it roll off you, though. Your Manager was right, just make 'em happy. Remember that even though money is involved, it's a game.
 
I'll also be touching on the issue of Wal-Mart's practice of harassing the shit out of pregnant, terminally ill or handicapped people so that they'll leave of their own accord, thus sparing the company the expense of unemployment pay.
This is usually done by assigning them strenous tasks which they cannot reasonably be expected to fulfill, then writing them up or otherwise punishing them for failing to finish in the allotted time. Doctor's notes be damned!
An older woman who had been working as a cashier before suffering a heart attack came back to work after a short leave of absence, and was immedately told to stock furniture. You know, computer desks, entertainment centers, bookshelves, etc.
I literally have hundreds of stories exactly like this.
There was an autistic kid who'd gotten a hernia on the job, and when he came back, they did everything in their power to ensure that he re-injured himself. He'd been a cart pusher before his accident, and when he came back they had him lifting 50lb bags of dog food as well as stacking empty pallets, which are even heavier. They weren't interested in his "excuses"(physician-ordered lifting restrictions)for "getting out of doing his job."
They actually thought it was funny that they were getting him to do all this stuff.
 
I have an issue I always considered angering -- I hope you touch upon it in the book: no overtime

I have no problem with not working overtime, but when asking me to do it and then telling me later I have to leave work early for a few days until the overtime is gone, is the same thing as not paying me while on the clock as far as I am concerned. This is ap ractice that needs to be made ILLEGAL.
 
Well, Sam's is a different animal altogether, because people have to pay membership dues to shop there. Not as many shirtless rednecks with barefoot, naked children changing their diapers on the shelves in the furniture dept, I would imagine.:rommie:
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement, you've inspired me to push even harder to finish the book.
And yes, someone did live in the sewer. Well, not really a "sewer" per say, but the water drainage area underneath the parking lot. Basically the same thing. It smells like one!

You'd imagine, but sadly you'd be wrong. The paltry $40/year fee isn't much of a deterrent. A redneck with a slightly fatter wallet is still a redneck. And believe me we got plenty of idiots who ran around barefoot (not just kids, but adults as well), changed diapers on the shelves (while also leaving the soiled diapers there on occasion- we had one woman even bury it under some shirts in the clothing section once.) and leave garbage pretty much anywhere other than in the garbage cans. Hell, about ten years back one of the managers was murdered right in the front parking lot. :eek:
 
Well, Sam's is a different animal altogether, because people have to pay membership dues to shop there. Not as many shirtless rednecks with barefoot, naked children changing their diapers on the shelves in the furniture dept, I would imagine.:rommie:
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement, you've inspired me to push even harder to finish the book.
And yes, someone did live in the sewer. Well, not really a "sewer" per say, but the water drainage area underneath the parking lot. Basically the same thing. It smells like one!

You'd imagine, but sadly you'd be wrong. The paltry $40/year fee isn't much of a deterrent. A redneck with a slightly fatter wallet is still a redneck. And believe me we got plenty of idiots who ran around barefoot (not just kids, but adults as well), changed diapers on the shelves (while also leaving the soiled diapers there on occasion- we had one woman even bury it under some shirts in the clothing section once.) and leave garbage pretty much anywhere other than in the garbage cans. Hell, about ten years back one of the managers was murdered right in the front parking lot. :eek:
I stand corrected!
 
I have an issue I always considered angering -- I hope you touch upon it in the book: no overtime

I have no problem with not working overtime, but when asking me to do it and then telling me later I have to leave work early for a few days until the overtime is gone, is the same thing as not paying me while on the clock as far as I am concerned. This is ap ractice that needs to be made ILLEGAL.
Yeah, that sucks. Stay until it's done, but NO OVERTIME!!! it's pretty ridiculous. They aren't even allowed overtime during a store setup, which makes no sense whatsoever. They're expected to stay an extra hour every day, of course, but NO OVERTIME! :techman:
 
I'll also be touching on the issue of Wal-Mart's practice of harassing the shit out of pregnant, terminally ill or handicapped people so that they'll leave of their own accord, thus sparing the company the expense of unemployment pay.
This is usually done by assigning them strenous tasks which they cannot reasonably be expected to fulfill, then writing them up or otherwise punishing them for failing to finish in the allotted time. Doctor's notes be damned!
An older woman who had been working as a cashier before suffering a heart attack came back to work after a short leave of absence, and was immedately told to stock furniture. You know, computer desks, entertainment centers, bookshelves, etc.
I literally have hundreds of stories exactly like this.
There was an autistic kid who'd gotten a hernia on the job, and when he came back, they did everything in their power to ensure that he re-injured himself. He'd been a cart pusher before his accident, and when he came back they had him lifting 50lb bags of dog food as well as stacking empty pallets, which are even heavier. They weren't interested in his "excuses"(physician-ordered lifting restrictions)for "getting out of doing his job."
They actually thought it was funny that they were getting him to do all this stuff.

Wow. Shocking, but not shocked. Abuse of the disabled and the elderly by magagement of a Corporation. What will they think of next? This is the tradeoff America has made for all its local business-killing. From a good, neighborhood store, to this. I guess we reap what we sow. It's all about lower prices, isn't it? Got to have those lower prices. Who needs God when you've got lower prices?

Another charming policy of theirs: the social control, not allowing employees to socialize after work. People who are so afraid of 1984 with Obama right now: go work at Wal-mart.
 
Well, Sam's is a different animal altogether, because people have to pay membership dues to shop there. Not as many shirtless rednecks with barefoot, naked children changing their diapers on the shelves in the furniture dept, I would imagine.:rommie:
Thanks to everyone for the encouragement, you've inspired me to push even harder to finish the book.
And yes, someone did live in the sewer. Well, not really a "sewer" per say, but the water drainage area underneath the parking lot. Basically the same thing. It smells like one!

You'd imagine, but sadly you'd be wrong. The paltry $40/year fee isn't much of a deterrent. A redneck with a slightly fatter wallet is still a redneck. And believe me we got plenty of idiots who ran around barefoot (not just kids, but adults as well), changed diapers on the shelves (while also leaving the soiled diapers there on occasion- we had one woman even bury it under some shirts in the clothing section once.) and leave garbage pretty much anywhere other than in the garbage cans. Hell, about ten years back one of the managers was murdered right in the front parking lot. :eek:
I stand corrected!

Yeah, bottom line; if it's the spawn of Sam Walton there's little doubt that evil is aligned with it somehow. :lol: I feel kind of nasty saying that though, since I honestly don't believe Walton ever intended to create a company that's just as famous (if not more so) for their worker's rights violations and scummy business practices as they are for their low, low prices.
 
So, let me set this up:

The grocery store that I work at ran a 24 hour sale yesterday. The ad clearly stated that it was for Thursday, August 27th. Below the very large letter stating Thursday, August 27th there was smaller print stating that the sale began at midnight on the 27th. So what happens today? I have at least five people coming up to me expecting to get yesterday's sale prices becuase they thought that the sale started at midnight last night. Seriously, how stupid do you have to be? The ad clearly stated that it was for the 27th, not the 28th. Yet all of them were in a huff when I told them that the ad was over, that they had mis-read it. But the worst part of it all? One of them went to the store manager, and he told me to honor the price. I mean come on.:scream: The store essentially just rewarded people for being morons. It makes me so mad having to suffer so many fools, and them getting what they want despite being total idiots that can't read a freaking ad correctly.

Do you work for Hy-Vee? 'Cause I had this same problem this week.
 
Another charming policy of theirs: the social control, not allowing employees to socialize after work. People who are so afraid of 1984 with Obama right now: go work at Wal-mart.

In my 10 years with Wal-Mart, I have never heard that.

That would only apply to fraternization between management and hourly associate.

Ok. What about those creepy-ass chants they do in the back of the store? Gave me chills. I think they were chanting "team-work!" but it sounded Satanic to me. :rommie:
 
In my 10 years with Wal-Mart, I have never heard that.

That would only apply to fraternization between management and hourly associate.

Ok. What about those creepy-ass chants they do in the back of the store? Gave me chills. I think they were chanting "team-work!" but it sounded Satanic to me. :rommie:

:lol:

Funny story, when I worked there and they did that, I always stood close with a wall bar that jetted out from the wall enough to cover me, and lead to the hall, and kept going left to the rest of the back of the store.

When it was time to do that shit, I stood up on the side hiding me, slowly backed away, and when nobody in charge was looking, slipped the fuck out of there. I never had to chant, wave, or watch that crap. :D


(and because I got out of tere early, I got to get a loading cart with wheels that actually worked, and a pallet jack)
 
Well, Sam's is a different animal altogether, because people have to pay membership dues to shop there. Not as many shirtless rednecks with barefoot, naked children changing their diapers on the shelves in the furniture dept, I would imagine.:rommie:

I've never seen that at a Wal-Mart or Sam's Club before. I'm sure it still happens, though. That also makes me want to puke.

I'll also be touching on the issue of Wal-Mart's practice of harassing the shit out of pregnant, terminally ill or handicapped people so that they'll leave of their own accord, thus sparing the company the expense of unemployment pay.
This is usually done by assigning them strenous tasks which they cannot reasonably be expected to fulfill, then writing them up or otherwise punishing them for failing to finish in the allotted time. Doctor's notes be damned!
An older woman who had been working as a cashier before suffering a heart attack came back to work after a short leave of absence, and was immedately told to stock furniture. You know, computer desks, entertainment centers, bookshelves, etc.
I literally have hundreds of stories exactly like this.
There was an autistic kid who'd gotten a hernia on the job, and when he came back, they did everything in their power to ensure that he re-injured himself. He'd been a cart pusher before his accident, and when he came back they had him lifting 50lb bags of dog food as well as stacking empty pallets, which are even heavier. They weren't interested in his "excuses"(physician-ordered lifting restrictions)for "getting out of doing his job."
They actually thought it was funny that they were getting him to do all this stuff.

Dude, you need to check out this thread I created in TNZ. Seriously, this story would fit right in with the thread.

What about those creepy-ass chants they do in the back of the store? Gave me chills. I think they were chanting "team-work!" but it sounded Satanic to me. :rommie:

Something tells me this chant is nothing like the Soldier's or Rifleman's Creed... :shifty:
 
They've since abandoned this policy as far as I know, but they used to tell people answering the phone at night to say "Wal-Mart security." You know, in lieu of having any actual security there. Because people who were planning to rob them were going to call ahead of time, I guess. :rommie:
 
They've since abandoned this policy as far as I know, but they used to tell people answering the phone at night to say "Wal-Mart security." You know, in lieu of having any actual security there. Because people who were planning to rob them were going to call ahead of time, I guess. :rommie:

That is one of the dumbest things I've heard today.
 
I don't understand, OdoWanKenobi...do you and Trekker4747 know each other? Was Trekker's internet down, or something, and asked you to post this for him?

Retail worker rage is not exclusive to one person.


And, yes Trekker, I work at Hy-Vee.
 
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