IF you represented the human race on a different planet?

[think]

What would you say/do? ,..want to explain... or Give and/or take? mention about everyone...and why?

Yes you represent everyone now... and have to give some kind of excuse for what is happening? go ahead.. Please explain the things happening in the bathroom or the eating styles or ,,, say what is the government doing and Why... why do we watch football... et, c.

So this can be short or long winded. But please Don't mess up because Humanity is counting on you...

Just consider this new planet you are on like heaven or Gods planet with citizens as God like omnipresent beings of the infinite everywhere., along the lines of a Q or worse.

so their questions may be many but starts with ,,,

Can you explain what is happening now?

 

[Amaris]

My species requires copious amounts of alcohol, nachos, and sex, as well as the need to initiate a sleep cycle spanning approximately 8-10 hours per day, every day. Mental stimulation is a must, as is physical stimulation. I will help you find the best porn.

 

[FPAlpha]

Have you seen The Big Lebowski? Perfect represenatation of humanity

 

[think]

I will "go".,,and attempt an apology as Aristotle had,..sorta,..

I apologize for us,..please accept my sincere apology we have not known what we were to do,..

I would also like to forgive you for any type of "involvement" you have had that may of caused suffering on our part or to yourselves. We need, guidance and will accept any kind of direction there is,..

There is not enough "change" right now,.. So if changes are of value then please direct us, as you can,..

If you could please give up watching porn, it will make you go blind,..

This's your friend I think?

 

[Miss Chicken]

I would simply say that though the human race often balls up, we have managed to create some really wonderful art, music and literature so are worthwhile as a species.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Oh, I'd lay down the law to the aliens right away:

I will introduce you to the glory of SKYLINE CHILI effective immediately.

However, if you fail to impress us, you may wish to remember that my species has a number of extremely sophisticated weapons, and unless you send me back to Earth *and* give me Mindy Kaling, I will order your planet reduced to a very warm object the size of a regulation softball.

 

[think]

I would simply say that though the human race often balls up, we have managed to create some really wonderful art, music and literature so are worthwhile as a species.

Sometimes I think the worthiness of a race or group of animals or even humans is measured by how the dead... are "processed" or would it be the process of respecting the dead and such.., others might measure ones "humanity" with the idea of how we treat each other while we are alive. Then of course still others don't care and are more interested in things like how to make - http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Ramen-Pizza - a ramen pizza....

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^ If the aliens ever found out about ramen noodles, they would immediately destroy the Earth, because they wouldn't believe that any sentient beings could eat something so horrible.

 

[sevenstars]

If they're that omniwhatever, THEY can explain it to ME.

Mmmm. Ramen.

 

[LordMudd]

QUARANTENE!

CCC.

 

[RandyS]

I'd convince them that George Costanza, Norm Peterson, and Homer Simpson are paragons of virtue and represent the best humanity has to offer.

It's true, after all.

 

[Leviathan]

I'd sell out the human race. Hard.

...pft, if I'm all the representation they can afford it's their own damn fault.

 

[Santaman]

All your bases are belong to us!

 

[Silvercrest]

I, for one, welcome our ... yeah, you got it.

 

[Showdown]

I'll do my best to represent Earth to the best of my ability, with honor and dignity. I'll answer their questions patiently and explain human behavior to them. I will also ask questions about their species, culture, and world.

Of coarse I would most likely, accidently offend them and start an inter-galatic war with everyone vs Earth, and doom humanity to a horrible fate. Most likely extinction. Sorry about that.

 

[Amaris]

I'll do my best to represent Earth to the best of my ability, with honor and dignity. I'll answer their questions patiently and explain human behavior to them. I will also ask questions about their species, culture, and world.

Of coarse I would most likely, accidently offend them and start an inter-galatic war with everyone vs Earth, and doom humanity to a horrible fate. Most likely extinction. Sorry about that.

See, there's your problem. If you start with the lowest common denominator, you can only go up from there. They wouldn't be offended because they'd just assume we're all backwards, self-centered assholes, and they'd be correct!

 

[USS Triumphant]

Given your description of these aliens/beings, and given that they've been polite enough not to simply invade my mind and take all the knowledge that I have that they want, I would offer them entry into my mind to do so, so long as they promised not to cause me permanent harm in the process, and they allowed me to select certain things from my mind to emphasize to them while they were in there.

In which case, I would show them the beauty of certain parts of our world that I have seen, my love for my family, and my hopes for the future.

If those would not be enough to ensure peace between our species, then humanity was going to be screwed no matter what I did.

 

[think]

Given your description of these aliens/beings, and given that they've been polite enough not to simply invade my mind and take all the knowledge that I have that they want, I would offer them entry into my mind to do so, so long as they promised not to cause me permanent harm in the process, and they allowed me to select certain things from my mind to emphasize to them while they were in there.

In which case, I would show them the beauty of certain parts of our world that I have seen, my love for my family, and my hopes for the future.

If those would not be enough to ensure peace between our species, then humanity was going to be screwed no matter what I did.

They might need those wires that get put into peoples heads for stuff like that but sure,, have you seen my wire collection? worst case scenario too much power to the wires and zap fried brains
______________________
Just remember even the man in the street might represent the average human... what if they went to this planet ,, the average Bob so to speak? Then what?
_______________