I Can See Why People Hate The Gazelle Speech

[tomalak301]

I've been doing an Enterprise rewatch and just finished the first season a few nights ago. I watched the Shockwave two parter and when it came to the Gazelle Speech, I remember when fans absolutely hated it. I wasn't one of those people, but after watching it again, I can see where that hate comes from. Archer was a pretty strong character against the Vulcans, yet this speech, especially when he says "...Humans aren't like that...", was not all that great. It wasn't bad, but it kind of falls apart during that part of it.

Of course having watched the series, It really is great to see how much Archer developed. He goes from a pretty weak speech here, to a pretty strong one in Terra Prime (A two parter I wish was the theme of Season 5, if they had one, prior to the Romulan War). At least in Shockwave he had T'Pol backing him up, so there's a plus.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

The utterly dumbass part is that by saying "humans aren't like that" there's an implication that Vulcans ARE like that for the analogy to work. Now okay maybe Vulcans do walk within moments of birth but this seems hardly likely.

I can imagine the Vulcans sitting there listening to this riveting biology lesson about how humans don't walk immediately like many animals and thinking "and...?" Because they don't either.

 

[Avro Arrow]

Of course having watched the series, It really is great to see how much Archer developed. He goes from a pretty weak speech here, to a pretty strong one in Terra Prime (A two parter I wish was the theme of Season 5, if they had one, prior to the Romulan War).

And his speech in TATV was just *awesome*! Or so we were led to believe anyway, since we never got to hear it.

Just as well, I guess, since "Archer's" speech would actually have been written by the TATV scriptwriters, and, well, you know.

 

[tomalak301]

Of course having watched the series, It really is great to see how much Archer developed. He goes from a pretty weak speech here, to a pretty strong one in Terra Prime (A two parter I wish was the theme of Season 5, if they had one, prior to the Romulan War).

And his speech in TATV was just *awesome*! Or so we were led to believe anyway, since we never got to hear it.

Just as well, I guess, since "Archer's" speech would actually have been written by the TATV scriptwriters, and, well, you know.

I've liked the believe that the speech he gave in Terra Prime was the one that we missed in TATV.

 

[Melakon]

The punchline on The Gazelle Speech is Soval essentially saying "What the hell are you talking about?"

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

They should have zoomed over to him rolling his eyes mid speech.

 

[Melakon]

Yes, Gary Graham plays his response as if irritated he spent 5 minutes listening to Archer not making any sense.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Soval is the most kick ass Vulcan ever.

 

[Mach5]

Soval is the most kick ass Vulcan ever.

Tuvok would like a word with you.

 

[RandyS]

Soval is the most kick ass Vulcan ever.

Tuvok would like a word with you.

Tuvok??

What about Spock??

As for the Gazelle speech, it never bothered me. Still doesn't. Seemed apt, really.

 

[Melakon]

The speech might have gone over better if he'd first explained to the Vulcans what a gazelle actually is, since they probably don't have them on their own planet.

 

[eyeresist]

^ Before I deliver this speech, I'd like you to watch this two-hour documentary about life on the African plains.

 

[Ethros]

Just on the topic of Archer speeches, I always loved his one to the crew in 'Azati Prime'


"I've always been much better at avoiding farewells than giving them, so I'm not even going to try, but I'm going to ask all of you to think back to the day when this ship was first launched. We were explorers then. When all this is over, when Earth is safe, I want you to get back to that job. There are four hundred billion stars in our galaxy. We've only explored a tiny fraction. You have a lot of work to do. Of all the Captains who will sit in this chair, I can't imagine any of them being more proud than I am right now"

 

[jespah]

/Archer hands out DVDs of Wild Kingdom before every meeting with the Vulcans/

I'd like you to study these before we talk today.

 

[eyeresist]

Just on the topic of Archer speeches, I always loved his one to the crew in 'Azati Prime'

"I've always been much better at avoiding farewells than giving them, so I'm not even going to try, but I'm going to ask all of you to think back to the day when this ship was first launched. We were explorers then. When all this is over, when Earth is safe, I want you to get back to that job. There are four hundred billion stars in our galaxy. We've only explored a tiny fraction. You have a lot of work to do. Of all the Captains who will sit in this chair, I can't imagine any of them being more proud than I am right now"

That was a good one - simple and heart-felt.

 

[Mach5]

Soval is the most kick ass Vulcan ever.

Tuvok would like a word with you.

Tuvok??

What about Spock??

Half-breeds don't count.

 

[wulfio]

The utterly dumbass part is that by saying "humans aren't like that" there's an implication that Vulcans ARE like that for the analogy to work. Now okay maybe Vulcans do walk within moments of birth but this seems hardly likely.

I can imagine the Vulcans sitting there listening to this riveting biology lesson about how humans don't walk immediately like many animals and thinking "and...?" Because they don't either.

It's a freaking metaphor.

 

[Anna Yolei]

The Gazelle speech was one of those "You had to be there" things. In 2002 (at least on this board) folks either really liked the guy, or really wanted him to go away, some to the point of cheering on his demise to be replaced with Trip. The speech is nothing to write home about, but if you are one that believes that Archer is as incompetent as Captain as I believe Fitzgerald Grant is a President on Scandal, this will just convince you even more that the guy sucks.

 

[tomalak301]

The Gazelle speech was one of those "You had to be there" things. In 2002 (at least on this board) folks either really liked the guy, or really wanted him to go away, some to the point of cheering on his demise to be replaced with Trip. The speech is nothing to write home about, but if you are one that believes that Archer is as incompetent as Captain as I believe Fitzgerald Grant is a President on Scandal, this will just convince you even more that the guy sucks.

Which, upon rewatching Season 3, Archer ended up being an excellent captain.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Great leaders can't always write great speeches, that's why they employ people to do it for them. Obviously in the case of the gazelle speech this didn't happen.